Virtually and Really

[kamorrista]

Dad! Dad! At school, in computer class, they asked me tomorrow to explain the difference between 'virtually' and 'really' ...

- Well .... Ask your mother if she would make love with another man for a million pounds.

- Child follows:
- Mum ... Would you make love with another man for a million pounds?
- Of course!

- Dad! Dad! She said yes!
- Well ... now go and ask your sister ...

- Mary ... Would you make love with a man for a million pounds?
- Sure!
- Dad! Dad! She said yes!

- Okay, and also ask your older brother.

- Bob, would you make love with a man for a million dollars?
- Of course man!
- Dad, Dad, he has also said yes!

- You see ... 'Virtually' we have three million pounds, but 'really' only have a couple of whores and a fag at home.

:england:

 

[Lamp]

lmao

 

[Ezteq]

heheh good one sweetie

 

[Lamp]

Sean Connery bragged that despite being 72 years of age, he could still have sex 3 times a night. Cilla Black, looked intrigued.

Cilla says: "Sean, if I'm not bein' too forward, I'd luv to 'ave sex with yer.
Lets go back to my 'ouse, we could 'ave a lorra fun.

So they went back to her place and got comfortable. After a couple of drinks they went off to bed and had an hour of mad passionate sex together. Afterwards, Sean says, "If you think that was good, let me shleep for half an hour, and we can have better shex.

But while I'm shleeping, hold my balls in your left hand and ma willy in your right hand".
Cilla looks a bit perplexed, but says "Okay".

He sleeps for half an hour, awakens, and they have even better sex than before. Then Sean says, "Cilla, that was wonderful. But if you let me shleep for an hour, we can have the besht shex yet. You'll have to......."

"I know Sean. Yer want me to 'old onto yer bat 'n balls again. No problem hun".
Cilla complies with the routine.

The results this time are absolutely mind blowing.

Once it's all over, they have a drink, Sean lights a cigarette and Cilla asks

"Sean, tell me, dis 'oldin yer balls in one hand
and yer willy in de other - does it really stimulate yer that much?"

Sean replies, "No, not at all Cilla,

but the last time I shlept with a scouser, the bitch stole ma wallet!"

 

[Madmaxx]

hah lamp!