T.L.S.I.T.W.O.T.W. (B.S.) volume 2!

[Summo]

... and a tidy pile of small intenstines. Wij examined the heap and turned to TdC...

 

[Wij]

..."You've travelled a long way to get here young man. Here, have a length of my intestine. You see, I am indestructable, much like Captain Scarlett but without the strings."

Wij then stuck his head in a blender...

 

[Stazbumpa]

...because he had heard this was a good cure for herpes, but...

 

[Sir Frizz]

...instead, the only thing it cured was his severe case of ghonnorhea , but then it caused his body to have violent reaction as he couldnt live without it, wij screamed to tdc to help save him so tdc decided to...

 

[Summo]

... reinfect Wij immediately by...

 

[Sir Frizz]

...grabbing the nearest jar which read...

 

[PR.]

...Marmite

TDC resisted throwing it away instead injecting a large dosage into Wij's...

 

[Testin da Cable]

...left nostril and then...

 

[PR.]

... his right nostril...

 

[DAN200]

...which would in later life cause tdc much embaressment. In the meantime...

 

[Stazbumpa]

...someone was eating a jam sandwich...

 

[old.ignus]

....but then looked up as if to say "did I leave the gas on?".......

 

[Stazbumpa]

..and then thought "'course not, I'm a fucking squirrel" and carried on. Then...

 

[old.ignus]

Threw down the sandwich saying "fucking jam sandwiches, I long for a grapefruit." then suddenly...

 

[DAN200]

...he fell out of the tree, and was trod on by a...

 

[Testin da Cable]

...passing...

 

[DAN200]

...wallaby, "Hey" said the sqirrel, "What do you think you're doining knocking me out of my tree and tredding on me like that?"
"Sorry m8" said the Wallaby, "I was just going to the billabong down fosters street to meet Skippy and whadaya know I end up 'ere"
"Well that just isnt good enough" said the Squirrel "And if you dont get out of here fast i'll...

 

[Stazbumpa]

"...apply fantastic makeup and pretend I'm your bird." The Wallaby thought about this for a second, then...

 

[Testin da Cable]

..said "'ere d'you like...

 

[DAN200]

...to see my nuts?"...

 

[Stazbumpa]

...to which the reply was "Not particularly, I have a tree full of the bastard things"...

 

[Testin da Cable]

...by which he meant...

 

[Wij]

...a tree full of nuts...

 

[Summo]

... and not ...

 

[Sir Frizz]

...the things that run through your head, so...

 

[DAN200]

...that was that. The Wallaby then bounced accross the road away from the squirrels tree, before being squashed by a lorry.

However, the Squirrel now had a problem, "How to get back up onto his tree", he tried to think how he had origionally got up there when he moved in 5 months ago but he couldn't remember, so instead he..

 

[old.ignus]

.....cut down the tree to bring his home to the ground, he was afraid of heights anyway, however.....

 

[PR.]

...when the tree landed across the road with an oncoming School bus there was little the driver could do other than...

 

[Sir Frizz]

...open his window and jump out to save himself and let all the others die , but this caused the tabloid news papers to come onto the scene immediately and...

 

[DAN200]

...rescue DAN200 and all the sexy girls from the bus...