sayward
Resident Freddy
- Joined
- Nov 17, 2004
- Messages
- 2,262
Hi. Don't read this if you don't want to be depressed. I'm writing on here because it is easier than talking to anyone.
As many of you know I have a very iffy relationship with my mother. She has been very selfish and thoughtless and never treated me or my children as she should. However I always hoped that when anything happened to her it would be quick and painless.
Last week she rang and spoke to my husband to say how ill she was after a holiday. I rang back the next morning and got her partner of many years who said she had fallen in the night and hit her head. She's in her 80s and on various medicines. He hadn't had a doctor or an ambulance and he said she was asleep. Alarm bells should've been ringing..... He finally got her to A n E late afternoon, so 8hrs after the fall. I got a message to say she was ok and they were keeping her in for obs. However she had got a bleed on the brain...he was keeping me informed and kept saying when she's home etc etc, he's in his mid 70s. Witless fool had no idea that Warfarin makes you bleed worse. The ward gave her Vit K to stop its effects and she was on a drip. He said she's had an MRI and all was well.
He didn't call Friday or Saturday a.m so I rang the ward to be told that the bleeding on the brain was worse and that I'd better get there! She's at least a 5hr drive away and we have to stay in a hotel. So we drove up in that thick fog to visit. OMG she is out of it. There's a huge bump on her forehead and her eyes are totally black like from a major skull fracture. She's unresponsive. no recognition nothing. we had a meeting with doctors and nurses who said basically no hope and nothing could be done and that they'd keep her on a drip and give her sedation for her seizures.
We stayed with her all day, trying to talk to her etc Turns out he's only been visiting her for an hour a day and hasn't even met with a doctor. Yet the one we saw; he plays golf with! why isn't he visiting all the time?
We went back the next day and they have taken her off the, drip and the oxygen. She is just laying there with spasmodic movements. while we were there she had a major seizure. Dear God I am dangling by a thread. they kept saying there is nothing there, they are just waiting for her to die. I feel guilty but I couldn't stay, this is a woman who was just like me only older and went in to hospital full of life. And is now dying.
She could take weeks to die. I couldn't stay. I can't get out of my brain that she knew we were there and she knows what is happening. I'd vowed that I would never shed a tear over her but this is worse than ghastly no one should have this.
As many of you know I have a very iffy relationship with my mother. She has been very selfish and thoughtless and never treated me or my children as she should. However I always hoped that when anything happened to her it would be quick and painless.
Last week she rang and spoke to my husband to say how ill she was after a holiday. I rang back the next morning and got her partner of many years who said she had fallen in the night and hit her head. She's in her 80s and on various medicines. He hadn't had a doctor or an ambulance and he said she was asleep. Alarm bells should've been ringing..... He finally got her to A n E late afternoon, so 8hrs after the fall. I got a message to say she was ok and they were keeping her in for obs. However she had got a bleed on the brain...he was keeping me informed and kept saying when she's home etc etc, he's in his mid 70s. Witless fool had no idea that Warfarin makes you bleed worse. The ward gave her Vit K to stop its effects and she was on a drip. He said she's had an MRI and all was well.
He didn't call Friday or Saturday a.m so I rang the ward to be told that the bleeding on the brain was worse and that I'd better get there! She's at least a 5hr drive away and we have to stay in a hotel. So we drove up in that thick fog to visit. OMG she is out of it. There's a huge bump on her forehead and her eyes are totally black like from a major skull fracture. She's unresponsive. no recognition nothing. we had a meeting with doctors and nurses who said basically no hope and nothing could be done and that they'd keep her on a drip and give her sedation for her seizures.
We stayed with her all day, trying to talk to her etc Turns out he's only been visiting her for an hour a day and hasn't even met with a doctor. Yet the one we saw; he plays golf with! why isn't he visiting all the time?
We went back the next day and they have taken her off the, drip and the oxygen. She is just laying there with spasmodic movements. while we were there she had a major seizure. Dear God I am dangling by a thread. they kept saying there is nothing there, they are just waiting for her to die. I feel guilty but I couldn't stay, this is a woman who was just like me only older and went in to hospital full of life. And is now dying.
She could take weeks to die. I couldn't stay. I can't get out of my brain that she knew we were there and she knows what is happening. I'd vowed that I would never shed a tear over her but this is worse than ghastly no one should have this.