SPAM random annoying things

[Scouse]

... to shave balls, yes

Can't be arsed with a ball shave. Just trim a bit and shave owt that is encroaching on yer shaft.

 

[Moriath]

Miserable git


New job today. No laptop. No logon credentials. Hey ho.

Funny. New job today for me too. No login creds. Just a loaner laptop, no phone, no access to procurement so i can order phone etc .

Par for the course

 

[Tom]

@Tom no need for that facepalm, that's just mean - don't tell me you don't streamline your hair bits for cycling?

Facepalm was the closest icon to "holy shit where's the back button, quick quick!"

And no I don't shave anything, not even my face. I occasionally hit it with a beard trimmer though.

 

[Scouse]

Bloke reversed into my car the other day.

We were coming up to an artificially narrowed bit of road near a near-blind bend where the oncoming traffic had right of way. I was following him through when a car came round the bend in the opposite direction.

We all stopped in time, safely. I was about two car lengths behind him, put myself in reverse and checked behind me to see if anyone was there. At this point my G/F yelped - as he'd not bothered with that particular part of the malarky and wanged himself in reverse, fast, without looking.

Horn sounded, he hit, split my front bumper.


Oldish giffer got out, made sounds about "that looks old that split" to which I said "bollocks". Gave me his details.

Now, my car is old and on it's last legs, but the fucker has put a hole in my bumper. I was tempted to just ring the insurers but if it gets expensive they'll just write the car off. But it shouldn't be, just a new bumper + fitting for a 52-plate Civic Type-R. He asked me if I could get it sorted outside the insurance if I could, which I think is reasonable - but here's the rub - I've got no time to take my car into a garage this week for a proper quote (just started new job) and don't want to leave it too long.

I'd happily take a bit of cash off him now (before it gets too late to report to insurers without looking dodgy) and see how much it's gonna cost properly later and get it sorted if I was in the ball park. But how much is a front bumper for a type-r? I'm useless and google isn't proving my friend

Before anyone says "if you aren't arsed with the car, or the damage, let it go" - but I am a little arsed by the damage, and feel he should have some punishment for blindly reversing at speed without looking, even if I don't want to fuck over his (and probably my) insurance...

 

[CorNokZ]

Tell the insurance asap.you'll most likely never see him again and you will have your car fixed

 

[DaGaffer]

This is always how I imagined Tom. Then I saw him on TV and I was exactly right.

 

[CorNokZ]

View attachment 32262 This is always how I imagined Tom. Then I saw him on TV and I was exactly right.

DORA! DORA! DORA THE EXPLORER!!

Oh the fun of having a two year old who knows his way around on an iPad...

 

[fettoken]

Tell the insurance asap.you'll most likely never see him again and you will have your car fixed

They aren't quiet fond of that tbh. Some little shit pulled a key and scratched the coating alongside the car once, to which i couldn't say who did it, so i had to pay from my own pocket.

 

[Gwadien]

Tell the insurance asap.you'll most likely never see him again and you will have your car fixed

British insurance doesnt work like that.

If he claims, HIS insurance will go up, and in the long run it ain't worth it.

My housemate had a van change lanes on the motorway, his car was a total write off. But he's not claiming on it because the car is worth roughly 1500 but the increase in insurance isn't worth it.

 

[Gwadien]

More book woes.

So I thought I could get a online subscription for the book I need for $40, but turns out I need to be member of a list of silly historical societies.

Looks like I'm failing my dissertation.

 

[TdC]

this might help: https://isotropic.org/papers/chicken.pdf

 

[Moriath]

British insurance doesnt work like that.

If he claims, HIS insurance will go up, and in the long run it ain't worth it.

My housemate had a van change lanes on the motorway, his car was a total write off. But he's not claiming on it because the car is worth roughly 1500 but the increase in insurance isn't worth it.

apparently if you have had an accident if its your fault or not you are statistically more likely to have another.

i guess they did the sums.

its ok if you can afford to write off 1500 but im sure his insurance wouldnt go up by anywere near that unless he is a new driver

 

[Gwadien]

apparently if you have had an accident if its your fault or not you are statistically more likely to have another.

i guess they did the sums.

its ok if you can afford to write off 1500 but im sure his insurance wouldnt go up by anywere near that unless he is a new driver

He's my age, and its his first accident.

I guess he was looking at the long term rather than the short term.

His dad is a quantity surveyor in Dubai though, sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

 

[Raven]

Does he like Theatre?

 

[Gwadien]

Does he like Theatre?

No, he's black.

 

[Gwadien]

Shit Uni library, paying £9k a year.

'Can you guys get a free trial on this E-Book database, so I can get access to a book.'

'No, we have a copy of it'

'Yes, one, and it's been requested loads, and the person that has it hasn't returned it for over a week'

'Yes, and they'll get fined, sorry.'

'OK.'

 

[Tom]

View attachment 32262 This is always how I imagined Tom. Then I saw him on TV and I was exactly right.

 

[Tom]

I'd happily take a bit of cash off him now (before it gets too late to report to insurers without looking dodgy) and see how much it's gonna cost properly later and get it sorted if I was in the ball park. But how much is a front bumper for a type-r? I'm useless and google isn't proving my friend

Bumpers are more than just bits of plastic, they're an integral part of the car's safety features. You should check to see that nothing to which the bumper is attached isn't also damaged, like a bumper bar or similar.

Accidents like the above are why I bought a dashcam. No fucker is going to get away with claiming that I crashed into him...

 

[Scouse]

ccidents like the above are why I bought a dashcam. No fucker is going to get away with claiming that I crashed into him...

Yet, come november I won't give a fuck anymore tbh Tom. I've had enough crap happen and I'm tired of it

 

[Moriath]

Come november your gonna an hero ?

Btw day two better got laptop, phone and ms office ordered. Got my pass to the building.

Day three i kay do some work hehe

 

[dysfunction]

View attachment 32262 This is always how I imagined Tom. Then I saw him on TV and I was exactly right.

Oh please make that your Avatar @Tom !

 

[TdC]

Having sushi with a coworker I actually like, until he casually tells me he is two paygrades above me.

Why does this bother me?

 

[dysfunction]

Because you no longer see him as an equal

 

[Tom]

Oh please make that your Avatar @Tom !

Never. My avatar shall remain thus, hoping that @Deebs will animate it once more.

 

[DaGaffer]

Had a load of building work going on for the last few months and this week I packed the missus and the kids off to my Mum's in the UK so I can do a load of last minute painting, furniture assembling and general tidying up. Had a fancy new dining table delivered which needed the legs attaching. Did that, turned the table on its side, and...I can't get it the right way up on my own. Its too fucking heavy and I can't lever it. I've got the whole house ready for everyone coming back tomorrow and the fucking dining table is sat in the kitchen on its side.

 

[caLLous]

Bit late now but knock on your neighbour's door in the morning?

 

[Moriath]

Bit late now but knock on your neighbour's door in the morning?

He might mow your grass too

 

[caLLous]

I was just thinking, it might be a @Gwadien situation and his neighbours won't help because of the colour of his skin or because he's not from round those parts.

 

[Raven]

Ask your wife to help with the heavy lifting when she gets back.

 

[Fweddy]

Take the legs off, turn everything the right way up and then put the legs back on. Sorted.