SPAM random annoying things

[Deebs]

31bn, the total capacity in litres of Bewl reservoir, which Southern Water is seeking a drought order to refill.
35bn litres lost last year by Southern Water through leaks.

Bunch of thieving cunts.

 

[TdC]

omg you're joking right? surely that can't be true?

 

[Punishment]

If they are pricing the wasted water at full price they would get for it from cunsomers i can believe those figures

 

[Rubric]

31bn, the total capacity in litres of Bewl reservoir, which Southern Water is seeking a drought order to refill.
35bn litres lost last year by Southern Water through leaks.

Southern has a drought order. It also has the best leakage record in the country.

 

[Raven]

That's not exactly difficult is it? I wouldn't call it best though, least terrible, maybe.

 

[old.Tohtori]

Random guy asking for a ciggy on the street. Ok, annoying enough, but not the annoying bit of the day.

I said no as i had only two left. The guy went along as i fiddled with my mp3 player and when i turned the corner, the guy lit up not 50m from me.

No one else around, so he was clearly asking for more when he already had some

 

[Ormorof]

as i read once "they can pump oil from Siberia but they cant pump water from Sheffield..."

Of course, water is still slightly cheaper than oil

 

[Punishment]

The perfect car at the perfect price (i can haggle off near a grand for cash) comes along 4 weeks before you are buying

http://cars.donedeal.ie/for-sale/cars/2999535

 

[megadave]

chilli on your fingers, i've washed my hands but just scratched my bellend and now it tingles, i hope it stays as a tingle

 

[Overdriven]

Antibiotics. I sneeze, a medical wound tore open, GP went "fuck that" and told me to come back after the week of drugs.

 

[Punishment]

chilli on your fingers, i've washed my hands but just scratched my bellend and now it tingles, i hope it stays as a tingle

Haha reminds me of working in a kitchen, friend wanted to go for a piss and head chef said, ok ok just seed and slice up these 6 red chillis for me first john will you please.

2 minutes later the whole kitchen is at the door waiting to hear the screams out of the jacks

 

[Lamp]

Idiots.

Fuel Tanker drivers have rejected the deal, but they say they're NOT going to strike (yet), but ppl have started panic buying anyway.

 

[Ch3tan]

chilli on your fingers, i've washed my hands but just scratched my bellend and now it tingles, i hope it stays as a tingle

Never handle chilli's without oiling up your hands first. Simples.

 

[cHodAX]

Never handle chilli's without oiling up your hands first. Simples.

Yep and definately don't take a piss after handling scotch bonnets.

 

[Overdriven]

Went to the gym this morning, taking hoodie off... Accidentally punched myself in the eye, bent my glasses to shit and head-butted the Olympic bar from the hit.

 

[Ch3tan]

Hah, I would have paid good money to see that.

 

[Wazzerphuk]

What kind of hardcore Soviet gym do you go to where you're wearing a hoodie on the gym floor? Cold concrete room with no aircon?

 

[Ch3tan]

Wazz fail, he was clearly on a bench.

 

[Overdriven]

ACTUALLY NO. We just got in and were setting up, pissing it down here at 10am =/

 

[Wazzerphuk]

Wazz fail, he was clearly on a bench.

I fail to see how anyone could ever wear a hoodie at a gym at all!? On a bench or on the floor. Do you not change before? This routine sounds UNUSUAL

 

[Ch3tan]

Lots of people wear hoodies whilst weight training.

 

[Wazzerphuk]

I've seen them. They're mental. I don't get how you don't overheat massively doing that

 

[Overdriven]

Just to clarify, once we set up all hoodies came off. Not one of those freaks who wear them whilst actually doing anything! (Only there for the walk and back)

 

[Punishment]

Manflu !

 

[Lamp]

Trying to flick a bogie and it just won't come off your finger.

Yes, yes, disgusting, digusting etc etc, yes, yes, yes, I know, tissue, tissue, tissue....shut your yappers!

 

[Punishment]

Rub it in the missus hair and hide the action by commenting on how soft her hair is

 

[Wazzerphuk]

Erm. Why aren't you eating it?

 

[megadave]

Wipe it somewhere and save it for later

 

[Scouse]

Should I post home made bj video on the net or just email to New fella?

UL Rubric. Post here. You'll feel better.

Then go out and fuck her sister/mum/brother... if a bitch can't wait a decent time after 15 years she deserves it.

 

[Billargh]

Wipe it in your pocket or on your sock man, totes obv!