Rant Just got bollocked

[cHodAX]

Contract working today, nothing happening so I have been fannying around and posting on forums including here. Some jumped up little twat came over and gave me a talking to about company rules on personal internet usage. I promptly informed him that 'I am doing research for a book I am writing on the causes of paedophilia and it's effect on modern day society'. His face went blank, he had nothing, nothing at all.

Five minutes later my 'boss' comes over, the little twat had been in to see him and said he was disturbed by what I had said. My 'boss' told me that the Pete Townshend defence would carry no weight with human resources and that I should cease my research for the day. We both had a good laugh and then he fucked off back to his cubicle in the corner where the office zombies work.

So, here I am on the shitter, typing this on my android phone and wondering if I can squeeze in a crafty wank before I am missed and they send out a search party down to the creche!

 

[eksdee]

Fuck people like that seriously. Kill them with fire.

 

[megadave]

cant escape the image of chodax wanking off on a toilet to an asian lass sticking 12inches of rubber up her sphincter, it's probably happening right now

 

[Punishment]

Nukeitfromorbit

 

[TdC]

cant escape the image of chodax wanking off on a toilet while sticking 12inches of rubber up his sphincter, it's probably happening right now

ooo mind pics...

 

[cHodAX]

ooo mind pics...

I couldn't manage the full 12, it wouldn't go around the U-bend.

 

[TdC]

you're letting yourself get beat by a girl???

 

[cHodAX]

you're letting yourself get beat by a girl???

Wouldn't be the first time, there was this one time at band camp where a girl battered me around the head with her flute after I caught her masturbating with it! GINGER BITCH!

 

[TdC]

mighty tempted to look for that 30" dildo slap fight I saw a vid of once now

 

[Lamp]

Ah the joys of office life.

 

[Job]

They started watching our net use, they said 'don't use it to much or you'll be sacked'
Whatever 'too much' is.
So I pulled the Lan and stuck a 3G dongle in, the IT guy would have had a heart attack if he knew.

 

[Lamp]

Our PC's @ work have had the spare USB ports blocked. You have to ring up IT if you want to insert a USB memstick.

 

[Job]

Good idea really, I single handedly managed to infect to infect most of the files on the Lan with an virus in a cracked version of Word, there wasn't even anyone watching and I ran a tool to remove it and no-one found out, the Lan only held most of the customer info for (large telecoms provider) in the North west.
It was before they had antivirus on the Lan or Pc's,(yes there was such a time)

 

[old.user4556]

I don't post on forums from work, infact I don't go near FH.

I generally get all the pages I want to read up in one go at lunch time and read them when I have quiet spells. I don't mean to go all Toht on you, but do you do a lot of web surfing and maybe this guy resented it?

The reason I ask is that it really, really gets on my tits when contractors on £450 a day don't knock their heads 100% of the day.

 

[old.Tohtori]

Actually my POV on it would be; Some surfing is fine, but if you do it all the time during the day, will get a comment on it

No one should be expected to work 100% of time.

 

[Levin]

A couple years ago my work starting blocking any pages with "games" or "gambling" or "sex" in it, so... naturally I can no longer log into FH from work. Sucks. And yes, I work for the government.

 

[Deebs]

A couple years ago my work starting blocking any pages with "games" or "gambling" or "sex" in it, so... naturally I can no longer log into FH from work. Sucks. And yes, I work for the government.

Can you not use a proxy of sorts?

 

[Lamp]

Practically every bank I've worked at has a very restrictive internet use policy. If there's a site you need access to for genuine business reasons, you have to ask IT to unblock it. It would be nice if you could trust all your employees to use the internet responsibly, but thats just not gonna happen. If I'm showing external clients round the office, I'd like them to see my people grafting, not lounging about, feet on the desk surfing youtube. With today's smartphones, ppl can surf what they like anyway.

 

[Job]

We were blocked by some bog standard web filter from an American company
who seemed to base the results on some Mormon view of the world, they blocked everything that wasn't wholesome.
Stonehenge was blocked for being associated with pagan cults.

 

[Ezteq]

I can't get FH at work, used to be able to but not any more, never got bollocked for it...been arseholed, twatted and wankered a few times though

 

[Deebs]

I can't get FH at work, used to be able to but not any more, never got bollocked for it...been arseholed, twatted and wankered a few times though

Arseholed... Did it hurt?

 

[Ezteq]

x4 bottles of wine...it was all golden till the next morning tbh then it hurt like you would not believe lol

 

[soze]

I am the guy that does the blocking and the bolocking at my place. It really is needed before we blocked Facebook some staff were spending 5 hours a day on there. So now we have allowed one hour a day of unfiltered browsing so they can still check facbook 20 times a day.

We are worse with the USB settings our users have thin clients and virtual pc's they are lucky they get sound.

 

[Embattle]

I tend to view this as a case of tough shit, so many people abuse company networks when they either know implicitly or have been told directly not to do such things.

 

[Shagrat]

You should see the ball and chain we have to secure around the network working in Local Govt. (well ours is secure anyway). PGP, Lumension disk security, RSA tokens, 2 factor authentication, streaming media/facebook access locked down through the firewall, executables blocked unless your an admin, the works.

 

[Huntingtons]

i like your companys idea with the unfiltered browsing 1 hour a day

 

[cHodAX]

I don't post on forums from work, infact I don't go near FH.

I generally get all the pages I want to read up in one go at lunch time and read them when I have quiet spells. I don't mean to go all Toht on you, but do you do a lot of web surfing and maybe this guy resented it?

The reason I ask is that it really, really gets on my tits when contractors on £450 a day don't knock their heads 100% of the day.

Lol mate, I am not even making 20% of that amount, before tax. Also work was utterly dead, there was literally nothing to do as a contractor.

 

[cHodAX]

x4 bottles of wine...it was all golden till the next morning tbh then it hurt like you would not believe lol

Jeez, if you got 4 bottles of wine up there it must really hurt!

 

[TdC]

heh, my department runs the servers that our company has it's internal web proxies on. you do not want to see the shit that goes through there. tbh, I'd fire the lot of them, bunch of pervs.

 

[Levin]

Can you not use a proxy of sorts?

I have no idea, and even if i could i wouldn't know how to.

But at our place it's really silly, because we are allowed to use facebook, in fact sometimes it's needed for our job. And some forums are fine to browse into just because there's no mention of "games" anywhere on the site, lol.

At our place, we have certain numbers we have to reach every month, so it's up to you how you spend your time.. if you dilly-dallied about on the net all month, it will show. Personally, I think that's a better system rather than regulating how many hours we can spend online. Sometimes the brain needs a break from all the number crunching.