Question Hotel rooms...

[Scouse]

If I didn't trust her I wouldn't even be in a relationship to begin with

So how come:

...until you have left that church as a married person your can never know that your partner is 100% committed at the time to spending the rest of your life together.

Thats what marriage is its the ultimate commitment..

So, did you just trust her a bit, but since you've left the church you trust her more?

 

[nath]

You assume i don't know it a 100% fact that it wouldn't change me.

If you're genuinely claiming that you know 100% for a fact that marriage wouldn't change/affect you then you're an idiot. Yes, it's shocking - I'm being insulting, but there's nothing more to be said. I'm not saying that it would certainly change you, as that would be equally idiotic, but you're making an assessment of a situation based on how well you claim to know yourself without any experience of what we're actually discussing, then claiming 100% certainty. That's ridiculous and moronic.

 

[russell]

You bloody well are

You should get seperate rooms though Russ, if it was me going and staying in the same room as a lady friend I would put my balls on your eyes while you sleep just for a bit of a laugh. I would also probably take a picture and put it on here entitled 'Bollock Eye Fun'.

Dont worry Trem. I would be far too scared to ever share a room with you.

Btw I go away with Ed to gigs and we get twin rooms or seperate rooms, depending on the £££.
That is never an issue. Hubby and I have trust. Our relationship is built on trust and neither if us are jealous types. We work on the theory that if someone wants to be with you and loves you great- if they dont or they want to be unfaithful you cant really stop it.

 

[old.user4556]

That is exactly it. Repped.

Sorry but Tohtori has posted some right bollocks on this thread.

The statistics on cheating speak for themselves. BY NO MEANS am I suggesting this is going to happen, but I find it laughably niaive when people say "if you're worried, you've got the issue" when 1 in 5 men cheat on their partners, and something like 1 in 10 women cheat. That's shockingly regular, so it is absolutely natural to be on guard in such a situation. The difference would be acting out and accusing the other person of infidelity; that would be unacceptable.

Infidelity Statistics

Cheating and Infidelity Statistics: Are Men Cheating More Than Women (article) by Stephany Alexander on AuthorsDen

And those were probably the only ones that a) admitted it b) got caught.

Sorry but the odds are overwhelmingly stacked against Tohtori's pish advice.

 

[old.Tohtori]

If you're genuinely claiming that you know 100% for a fact that marriage wouldn't change/affect you then you're an idiot. Yes, it's shocking - I'm being insulting, but there's nothing more to be said. I'm not saying that it would certainly change you, as that would be equally idiotic, but you're making an assessment of a situation based on how well you claim to know yourself without any experience of what we're actually discussing, then claiming 100% certainty. That's ridiculous and moronic.

If i claimed it on something that i didn't know about, i would be stupid. Marriage is not an experience that can be counted as a life-changing experience, unless getting married means something to you. To me, it doesn't. Claiming i'm stupid because i feel it's not important, is a different matter, and forcing ones lifestyle on me.

But marriage, as said here, is about love, commitment, trust, etc etc...ALL those things i can say i can give and feel without marriage. It's a fact, simple as that. Marriage doesn't bring more love, more trust, more commitment to my table.

You claiming that you know me better then i do, is the arrogant thing here.

Sorry but Tohtori has posted some right bollocks on this thread.

The statistics on cheating speak for themselves. BY NO MEANS am I suggesting this is going to happen, but I find it laughably niaive when people say "if you're worried, you've got the issue" when 1 in 5 men cheat on their partners, and something like 1 in 10 women cheat. That's shockingly regular, so it is absolutely natural to be on guard in such a situation. The difference would be acting out and accusing the other person of infidelity; that would be unacceptable.

I've posted my personal opinion on this thread, it's no more bollocks then your statements. Just to YOU they may be different.

But if you want to f*ck around with statistics, 4 out of 5 men don't cheat and 9 out of 10 women don't cheat. That's shockingly MORE regular then your cheaters.

 

[nath]

If i claimed it on something that i didn't know about, i would be stupid. Marriage is not an experience that can be counted as a life-changing experience, unless getting married means something to you. To me, it doesn't. Claiming i'm stupid because i feel it's not important, is a different matter, and forcing ones lifestyle on me.

But marriage, as said here, is about love, commitment, trust, etc etc...ALL those things i can say i can give and feel without marriage. It's a fact, simple as that. Marriage doesn't bring more love, more trust, more commitment to my table.

You claiming that you know me better then i do, is the arrogant thing here.

Sweet jesus, i don't know why I keep responding, you're so clearly missing the point and arguing phantom points that no one is making.

A) "Claiming i'm stupid because i feel it's not important, is a different matter, and forcing ones lifestyle on me."

I never said this at all. I said you were stupid for claiming 100% certainty that getting married wouldn't affect you. Without experiencing it you cannot know this. You can have an opinion on it and it may well turn out to be true but that doesn't mean you know it. No one is forcing any lifestyle here, other than that of common sense. I'm not married, never intend to get married - so that's totally not my point.

B)"You claiming that you know me better then i do, is the arrogant thing here."

I'm suggesting that without experience of something you can never truly know how it will affect you. I've no idea how marriage would affect you, you have a far better idea of that than I do, but claiming CERTAINTY is just stupid.

 

[old.user4556]

I've posted my personal opinion on this thread, it's no more bollocks then your statements. Just to YOU they may be different.

No, you're wrong. Hard and solid statistics on divorce rates and infidelity (forget about this hotel room for a minute) are indisputable and undeniable; and not my statements, but a statement about natural human behaviour.

 

[russell]

Sorry but Tohtori has posted some right bollocks on this thread.

The statistics on cheating speak for themselves. BY NO MEANS am I suggesting this is going to happen, but I find it laughably niaive when people say "if you're worried, you've got the issue" when 1 in 5 men cheat on their partners, and something like 1 in 10 women cheat. That's shockingly regular, so it is absolutely natural to be on guard in such a situation. The difference would be acting out and accusing the other person of infidelity; that would be unacceptable.

Infidelity Statistics

Cheating and Infidelity Statistics: Are Men Cheating More Than Women (article) by Stephany Alexander on AuthorsDen

And those were probably the only ones that a) admitted it b) got caught.

Sorry but the odds are overwhelmingly stacked against Tohtori's pish advice.

I know he talks bollocks. But on that initial post about trust issues, I agree with him. The rest is debatable tho.

 

[Aoami]

If you're genuinely claiming that you know 100% for a fact that marriage wouldn't change/affect you then you're an idiot. Yes, it's shocking - I'm being insulting, but there's nothing more to be said. I'm not saying that it would certainly change you, as that would be equally idiotic, but you're making an assessment of a situation based on how well you claim to know yourself without any experience of what we're actually discussing, then claiming 100% certainty. That's ridiculous and moronic.

Don't get worked up about it. Toht does this on Off Topic all the time, i've taken to just ignoring him now when an argument breaks out.

Would be lovely to hear a 'Fair enough, good point' from him just once.

 

[old.user4556]

In that case, you can never really say you'd 100% not like a 12" cock in your ass without taking every last GOD DAMN inch.

I'm joking. Humour injection to this thread .

 

[nath]

In that case, you can never really say you'd 100% not like a 12" cock in your ass without taking every last GOD DAMN inch.

I'm joking. Humour injection to this thread .

And I'd agree with that sentiment, you can be pretty damn sure though .

 

[kirennia]

I'm sort of on the fence with this whole marriage business...

Personally, I don't want to get married but later in life, who knows... it's not top of my to-do list as I personally see it as a waste of money for someone who isn't religious. I'd never say never is the point; to say with 100% certainty you would never do it is a bit misguided as if all you see it as is a piece of paper and the person you love wants to do it, why bother fighting it, especially if later down the line you end up with money to throw at something you don't see as having a point but another person you care about does... unless your religious practice says to do otherwise.

To put it into perspective, I also know that established religion, pray to God yada yada isn't for me but that doesn't mean I can't ever possibly understand the religion itself. Okay so I can't see why these people would want to go to church and thus will never understand it from their point of view but my view is firm in that I would get nothing out of it whatsoever.

The same can be applied to marriage. I personally don't think I'd ever get anything out of it as I see it much like Tohtori, just another thing which should change nothing. If I ever got to the stage where I would be considering marriage, I would already trust the person I was with and would have to be damn sure there was a 100% commitment already in place thus, what would be the point in writting it down on a piece of paper when I've already reached that conclusion?

All it is is a kick start from an early point in a relationship onto a later one when over time, you'd get there eventually anyway.


To prove a point, do you think a couple who were seeing each other for 3 months and married for three would understand what it takes for a 'marriage' to succeed more then a non-religious couple who had been together for 30 years and had kids? Of course not because time is more important then an institutionised(sp?) piece of paper which ultimately only holds financial merit in the case of a divorce... the same laws which can be applied if a couple are living together for x amount of years anyway (I forget how many years it is).

 

[old.Tohtori]

Aoami, Fucking cop-outs then, fine. I'm always like this, why f*cking bother. I've said many times the "fair point" thing, i've admitted i'm wrong, but when people claim i argue when they don't even F*CKING CONSIDER WHAT I'M SAYING, or try to understand it, it's a big old fashioned cluster*fck. So go f*ck yourselves.

Nath, you happy if i say that with 99.999999999% certainty marriage won't change me? You want to get into those f*cking semantics? Whoopie, you win. Yei! You probably love cock though. How about you stop paraphrasing and taking things out of context and read what is written.

Big G, 9 out of 10 women don't cheat, 4 out of 5 men don't cheat, your statistics lose. You lose, f*ck you. Also, while we're at it; you called my points, personal opinions, bollocks. If i had posted statistics, you could call them bollocks on your "proven fact" claim, as such, you simply call my own personal opinion bollocks.

Weee! Let's all be insulting f*ck heads.

 

[russell]

Ok, so they share a room and he tries it on (he is male ffs, shit faced and on a high from the gig)

He tries it on, she says no and then still shares a room with him, A, would she feel comfortable to share a room with someone that made a drunken pass at her and B, would hubby be happy that he tried it on and they still shared a room? Somehow I doubt it.

The fact that the question even needed asking shows that there is a niggle of thought that something may happen.

The best way to stop something from happening is to remove the possibility of it happening, it would save a lot of red faces and friendship.

A- He would NEVER try it on -he is gentleman, he has respect for marriage, he is NOT interested and nor am I, he is in love with a lovely girl etc. Even if I was single I wouldnt and nor would he.

B- When you are in your 30's and the occasional drunken pass occurs (rare rare occasion). You just say 'get a grip and go and pull' then you laugh it off. Its flattering not awkward.

D- The question was mean't as a debate for interest, not a sign that deep deep down I think something may happen. It really really wouldn't.

 

[old.user4556]

You lose, f*ck you.

You need to be watching the Disney channel instead of being on the internet.

I put together a strong argument against your seemingly uneducated advice and never personally insulted you once.

 

[old.Tohtori]

You need to be watching the Disney channel instead of being on the internet.

I put together a strong argument against your seemingly uneducated advice and never personally insulted you once.

You know why it's uneducated? It's my personal f'cking opinion.

When you call MOST of what i posted bollocks, you insult me alright via insulting my personal views.

So take this as an attack on your personal views, f*ck your views.

Wee! Insulting is fun!

 

[taB]

To take a completely different tack and get back to Russell's original question.

I'd find it awkward for a couple of reasons.

1. She'd (a generic female type that is) take ages in the bathroom.

2. I'd do a stinky dump and spend the rest of the time feeling self-conscious.

 

[old.Tohtori]

And apologies to Big G. Uncalled for, completely.

Should leave discussions alone when in a bad mood.

Also to anyone else who felt i stepped over a line, apologies.

Now i'm gonna drop this subject, it's not gonna change anyones views either way and i think i've said the relevant opinion early on.

 

[nath]

Nath, you happy if i say that with 99.999999999% certainty marriage won't change me? You want to get into those f*cking semantics? Whoopie, you win. Yei! You probably love cock though. How about you stop paraphrasing and taking things out of context and read what is written.

Isn't that what I just showed you up as doing in my previous post to you? Arguing against points that were not being made. Anyway, yes this has become a somewhat semantic argument, not sure how it got there. I've more to say but quite frankly you're so stupid I just can't face it. It's like bashing your head against a brick wall.


"You probably love the cock though" - not even sure how to respond to that, is it supposed to be an insult? I'd take offence but I'm not 15.

 

[old.Tohtori]

Best way for you to understand a post, is to read it NOT as a persnal, completely about you post.

Never claimed you called me a child etc, others did.

You need to stop taking posts one by one and read the whole thing leading up to it and put things in context.

If you were having a discussion with someone about cars, and got to a part about tires, and you were makig a statement that goodyear tires were best for a slippery road with atleast a 300bhp car, and i only decided to take the "goodyear is best" and argue that, you'd get why your post and claims of my "argumenting non-points" was not valid.

Ok?

 

[nath]

Except that doesn't change the fact that you were arguing against points that no one was making.

"Never claimed you called me a child etc, others did."

Where did I suggest you were wrong for suggesting I was calling you a child?

 

[old.Tohtori]

Except that doesn't change the fact that you were arguing against points that no one was making.

"Never claimed you called me a child etc, others did."

Where did I suggest you were wrong for suggesting I was calling you a child?

This is why i kind of got angry before, because it feels like hitting MY head against a wall.

You weren't, and that point, wasn't towards you, but towards hte discussion had with others.(past tense)

Others made those points.

You claim i was wrong in arguing points NOONE made, when they did.

If you want to argue the point of "you don't know what marriage is like", read back a few pages, other things shouldn't concern you.

 

[nath]

You claim i was wrong in arguing points NOONE made, when they did.

"Claiming i'm stupid because i feel it's not important, is a different matter, and forcing ones lifestyle on me."

No one, no one made that point. Hence you're arguing against points no one is making.



edit: Gah, fuck this, it's not worth it. With regards to how well you know yourself, well - you don't seem to realise you're a fucking imbecile and most others do. So there's at least one thing I know more about you than you do. Maybe take a weekend at a spa and get to know your inner-retard. I'm sure it'll be very rewarding.

 

[old.Tohtori]

"Claiming i'm stupid because i feel it's not important, is a different matter, and forcing ones lifestyle on me."

No one, no one made that point. Hence you're arguing against points no one is making.

edit: Gah, fuck this, it's not worth it. With regards to how well you know yourself, well - you don't seem to realise you're a fucking imbecile and most others do so there's at least one thing I know more about you than you do. Maybe take a weekend at a spa and get to know your inner-retard. I'm sure it'll be very rewarding.

Well, i'd rather be a polite retard. I simply don't agree with you, if this warrants you calling me a retard(which is pretty high on the insult scale), then go ahead. Funny thing is, you're arguing about me to me.

But, even at the risk of making you doubt yourself, go read back.

First, you take that out of context of the whole discussion(like i said).
Second, i was called a child etc because i said i can understand the points without being married(it's right there, look it up).
Third, forcing of lifestyle comes from people saying i can't discuss a matter that has nothing to do wiith marriage, without being married.

It's like telling someone they can't discuss chapels without being married.

 

[Rubric]

Kids changes your life and in alot of cases the person.

Marriage changes nothing and neither should it. It is a piece of paper and some vows often taken before a diety that half the people who engage in the ceremony don't even believe in anyway.

 

[Yoni]

All marriage did for me was make me feel trapped...

 

[Edmond]

Btw I go away with Ed to gigs and we get twin rooms or seperate rooms, depending on the £££.

No we dont, you always make me stay in the YMCA down the road, due to the 100 metre court order injunction!!!

 

[taB]

All marriage did for me was make me feel trapped...

Wouldn't mind being trapped if it was by the right gal

 

[mank!]

You're asking a forum full of geeks, socially inept introverts and the terminally odd for advice on sleeping arrangements? Don't you have, like, humans you can talk to?

Sorry guys, you know I love you all (you bunch of freaks), but don't you think this is an odd question for this forum?

QFT

you're all freaks.



and my wallet is £200 lighter after paying for two nights at a hotel in brighton for new years. damn women.

 

[Sparx]

theres your first problem, taking a woman to the gay capital of uk. she probably thought you were a bummer. Or she's a carpet cleaner herself