OK so this time of year is usually very odd for me, it's a time when people talk about having their family with them and all the movies are about people being with loved ones etc, limping about in the back of my head, kind of like a weary elderly person, is the thought 'sheesh give me a break eh?!!'
However, this is not a depressing time for me, despite the pitying looks I get from people when they ask who am spending the holidays with lol, I love it! I think of every christmas I ever had that was umm lets say tilted in an unfavourable way (quite a lot tbh) and what really cheers me up is that I never ever have to have a bad christmas ever again!!
I have had people inviting me to be with them on the day, I decline politely because I really don't trust being around others but it's lovely to be asked. There is a huge difference between being on ones own and being alone, I have never actually been 'alone' over the holidays and (despite my fears earlier this year before I moved into HQ and all I saw ahead was a ghastly, dark gaping pit something akin to what lurks between Jordans...ears) 2010 is not the year I am about to start doing so either.
Don't get me wrong I'm no Pollyanna, thoughts of what I used to have and thoughts of what I never had still hurt me but thoughts of what I've done and what I've got and what I have to look forward to, they really cheer me right the hell up
Merry 'effin Christmas Freddysfamily
xxx
However, this is not a depressing time for me, despite the pitying looks I get from people when they ask who am spending the holidays with lol, I love it! I think of every christmas I ever had that was umm lets say tilted in an unfavourable way (quite a lot tbh) and what really cheers me up is that I never ever have to have a bad christmas ever again!!
I have had people inviting me to be with them on the day, I decline politely because I really don't trust being around others but it's lovely to be asked. There is a huge difference between being on ones own and being alone, I have never actually been 'alone' over the holidays and (despite my fears earlier this year before I moved into HQ and all I saw ahead was a ghastly, dark gaping pit something akin to what lurks between Jordans...ears) 2010 is not the year I am about to start doing so either.
Don't get me wrong I'm no Pollyanna, thoughts of what I used to have and thoughts of what I never had still hurt me but thoughts of what I've done and what I've got and what I have to look forward to, they really cheer me right the hell up
Merry 'effin Christmas Freddysfamily
xxx
