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[Scouse]

shame, you could've been flying into space with Captain Kirk

Tried it again. Worked second time round.

I'm Shatner's captain tho

 

[Madmaxx]

 

[old.user4556]

That is so fucking true.

"Hi Big G - need a very high level, ballpark, one time estimate to move these ten applications into outer space"

"ONE MILLION DOLLARS!"

"That's a bit steep isn't it?"

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

 

[Edmond]

Nutter

 

[Job]

Daily mail out Daily mails itself.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...ecting-spreading-virus-Western-countries.html

 

[Job]

This is what I have waited for...attached directly to bone and internal nerve connections..the first real jump to a roboman.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/s...se-mindcontrolled-prosthetic-arm-9785950.html

 

[Moriath]

Make it legs so I can get rid of my sciatica and I have them attached

 

[Raven]

Well this is awkward

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-29549414

 

[old.user4556]

UKIP and the SNP snapping at the heels of major parties.

 

[Tom]

http://viz.co.uk/bertie-blunt-parrots-cunt/

 

[BloodOmen]

 

[Job]

worked in an Arabic muslims house today..we went because the first guy called racially abused him apparantley..so we go in..bad gas leak and cut it off..well be back in two days to run new pipe...he phones a muslim charity and claims he is being victimised because of his race and we need to fix it right away...landlord rings in a panic..we go around the next day and hes at the door moaning we are literally 15mins late..he keeps going to his sink..like 10 times while we were there..marching out to say no hot water in this mumbling half arabic...we just ignored the cunt after 5 times..4 kids..on the dole..what a twat..I was close to ringing the police to say there were clocks and wires in the loft.

 

[CorNokZ]

Did he tell you in half Arabic that he was on the dole? You knew where his house was, why were you late? If anyone shows up 15 minutes late, I'd consider that pretty rude as well

Stop being a dick, Job

 

[Gwadien]

worked in an Arabic muslims house today..we went because the first guy called racially abused him apparantley..so we go in..bad gas leak and cut it off..well be back in two days to run new pipe...he phones a muslim charity and claims he is being victimised because of his race and we need to fix it right away...landlord rings in a panic..we go around the next day and hes at the door moaning we are literally 15mins late..he keeps going to his sink..like 10 times while we were there..marching out to say no hot water in this mumbling half arabic...we just ignored the cunt after 5 times..4 kids..on the dole..what a twat..I was close to ringing the police to say there were clocks and wires in the loft.

So he was an Arabic Muslim, who complained, had 4 kids, was on the dole, and made bombs?

Okay.

To be fair, you are quite racist, so how do we know you weren't being racist?

 

[Raven]

worked in an Arabic muslims house today..we went because the first guy called racially abused him apparantley..so we go in..bad gas leak and cut it off..well be back in two days to run new pipe...he phones a muslim charity and claims he is being victimised because of his race and we need to fix it right away...landlord rings in a panic..we go around the next day and hes at the door moaning we are literally 15mins late..he keeps going to his sink..like 10 times while we were there..marching out to say no hot water in this mumbling half arabic...we just ignored the cunt after 5 times..4 kids..on the dole..what a twat..I was close to ringing the police to say there were clocks and wires in the loft.

He was probably just trying to take yur jerb, Job.

 

[Edmond]

Job can time travel too now apparently, as he went round today to cut the gas off, and then went back the next day (obviously tomorrow) to find the guy moaning. Amazing

He was probably gay too.....

 

[Lakih]

I'm sorry you got Ebola at work @Job Get well soon mate.

 

[Job]

I said he was a twat..I didn't say all arabs are twats which is racism by generalisation..the landlord told us he was on the social and that he was going through eviction because he is a c@nt on a stick..but hes having problems because he pulls the racism card at every stage.
He falsely got us accused of racially victimising him and the previous guy lost his contract with the estate agent and I heard last night he got a visit from the Police
and the reason we were coming back in two days is because he built his ow carport under the boiler from scrap metal and plastic sheet so we needed a cherry picker..but we just cut a hole in it for the ladder..it leaked live a sieve anyway.

 

[old.Tohtori]

Had one of those biscuits named ladyfinger and i don't get those. Like eating the bottom half of a stale jaffa cake

 

[DaGaffer]

Had one of those biscuits named ladyfinger and i don't get those. Like eating the bottom half of a stale jaffa cake

Aren't you supposed to soak those? Don't they go in the bottom of trifles and things?

 

[old.Tohtori]

Aren't you supposed to soak those? Don't they go in the bottom of trifles and things?

Yeah could be, ah well, case closed then. They -are- cake bottoms

 

[old.user4556]

Aren't you supposed to soak those? Don't they go in the bottom of trifles and things?

Nah, you're thinking of tampons gaff.

 

[Gwadien]

@Big G

 

[DaGaffer]

Nah, you're thinking of tampons gaff.

God, I know Scottish cuisine is bad, but a tampon trifle sounds terrible.

 

[BloodOmen]

 

[Bodhi]

God, I know Scottish cuisine is bad, but a tampon trifle sounds terrible.

Last time I was in the states I managed to gross out the locals with how unhealthy Scottish cuisine was. I would call that a win.

 

[old.user4556]

@Big G

Clearly not Scotland - distinct lack of needles, tin foil and brown power.

FAIL.

 

[old.user4556]

God, I know Scottish cuisine is bad, but a tampon trifle sounds terrible.

In Scotland, a Bloody Mary has a different meaning.

 

[CorNokZ]

In Scotland, a Bloody Mary has a different meaning.

 

[BloodOmen]