John Titor

[Wij]

Pi despises you.

 

[nath]

No it doesn't. It told me the other day it was very fond of me. It told me to watch out for that wij, and not to believe his lies. :|

 

[Wij]

believe His lies...

What you see as deception is simple a failure of your perception.

 

[nath]

I can see this dragging on for ages :|

 

[Wij]

We have all the ages that time sees fit to thrust upon us.

 

[nath]

See?

 

[dysfunction]

It was previously a question of finding out whether or not life had to have a meaning to be lived. It now becomes clear, on the contrary, that it will be lived all the better if it has no meaning.

 

[Mr.Monkey]

Originally posted by Wij
We have all the ages that time sees fit to thrust upon us.

Does that mean you are unemployed?

 

[Wij]

My job-status is not relevant to that fact. Time is oblivious to P45s.

 

[dysfunction]

Time cannot be oblivious to anything as it doesnt exist

 

[Wij]

Time is resentful.

 

[Mr.Monkey]

Originally posted by Wij
Time is resentful.

Of your p45?

 

[Wij]

Of your p13.

 

[Mr.Monkey]

Originally posted by Wij
Of your p13.

And lo, p13 doth dictate
"3.3 Upon the opening of the yellow source, evil shall flow forward, and be a plague upon the land.
3.4 Followed shortly by some good stuff, and the people rejoiced
3.5 Then more bad things happened, and the angels of hell did wreak havoc across many lands, and there was great sadness in gods eyes.
3.6 Then more rejoicing as sadness gets boring after a while"

-Extracts from "DIY Prophet kit - You too can be shrouded in mystery"

 

[Wij]

An interesting read. Could you pass me the book ?

 

[Mr.Monkey]

It's quite long, so I'll get my secretary to scan it in.

In the meantime, enjoy this mass hysteria (needless to say, american)

http://www.swgalaxies.net/maswg/

 

[Wij]

OMG THAT IS LIEK YE OLDE JOKE !!!1

Seriously - pass me that book. I can see it next to you. If you can move it six inches nearer I can wrap space over the remaining distance.

 

[Mr.Monkey]

I'm now using the "Book of Monkey Propecy" to gain an added inch to my stature, by sitting on it.


Can u read it through my buttocks?

 

[Wij]

I have eyes in my fist.

 

[Mr.Monkey]

Now hold on, I'm not up for a fisting.
I'm just not that loose.


Yet.

 

[dysfunction]

After wij has finished with you you could fit an aircraft carrier in there

 

[Wij]

And I will try it.

 

[Mr.Monkey]

Originally posted by Wij
And I will try it...

on with the sailors?

 

[Wij]

If you promise not to fart.

 

[Mr.Monkey]

tbh my plan was to run away as you were getting off with the sailors.

and to break wind.

 

[Wij]

Not with my fist up you. I'd grab onto a lung real tight.

 

[Mr.Monkey]

I don't have lungs. I upgraded to gills.

I'm thinking an anus upgrade might be advisable as well.

 

[Wij]

You'll have a swim bladder then. That will do fine.

 

[Mr.Monkey]

Nah, I can't swim. So no need for a bladder.

I don't store my pee, I just leak.

 

[Wij]

If swim bladders contained urine there would be a lot of dead fish stuck to the bottom of ponds.

Still, whatever sinks yer boat.