Friends getting pissed off.

old.Tohtori

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 23, 2004
Messages
45,210
So, short SHORT formula:

Misunderstandment, friend took it wrong(woman, yeah i know), i apologized for the confusion even if it wasn't needed, no time to explain further as she huffed, after small silent treatment(2 days), i got a real verbal slapping of how i'm like this and that etc. And back to silent treatment.

Now, i'm figuring, since it really wasn't my fault, i shouldn't do mroe, and let her come around. And if she's not REALLY a friend(been best friend for many years), she won't?

Basically, do real good friends come around, especially when the issue isn't "you f*cked my gf!" style?

or

it doesn't matter, if people get pissed off, relationships mean nothing?
 

Laddey

FH is my second home
Joined
May 24, 2005
Messages
7,124
If she's a real good friend i'm sure she will come round in no time man. Who could give you, THE LEGEND TOHTORI, the silent treatment?!
 

echome

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Feb 19, 2004
Messages
1,609
Wait and see, you never know what will happen :->
 

old.Tohtori

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 23, 2004
Messages
45,210
Who could give you, THE LEGEND TOHTORI, the silent treatment?!

I know! It's like, not liking porn or something :eek6:

Aye, have to give it time i guess, and NOT snipe back. Which is the hardest part really. When you get called for something you're like supposedly, it's really hard not to start pointing out other peoples flaws.
 

Thorwyn

FH is my second home
Joined
Dec 22, 2003
Messages
4,752
You apologized.. what more can you do?
It´s her move now. If she´s a friend, then she will come back. Although, of course, there IS no such thing as "friendship" between a man and a woman. Or so they say. :)
 

Laddey

FH is my second home
Joined
May 24, 2005
Messages
7,124
What did you say tohtori, i wanna know. Broadcast it on FHOT so we can all have a laugh :(
 

old.Tohtori

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 23, 2004
Messages
45,210
It's no laughing matter really, but, basically she wasa telling of something being "like this", then i said "sometimes things are like this, know from experience" and she took it as "oh you're saying i don't have a problem eh?".

When it was meant as a reference point.

Thorwyn aye, a friendship between man and woman is more of a relationship without the good stuff :eek7:
 

Laddey

FH is my second home
Joined
May 24, 2005
Messages
7,124
It's no laughing matter really, but, basically she wasa telling of something being "like this", then i said "sometimes things are like this, know from experience" and she took it as "oh you're saying i don't have a problem eh?".

When it was meant as a reference point.

Thorwyn aye, a friendship between man and woman is more of a relationship without the good stuff :eek7:

Misunderstanding then. Would ya like a snuggle toht?
 

swords

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Dec 22, 2003
Messages
4,337
Shit happens. If the friendship means something in time she'll come round for sure. Maybe you can laugh about it afterwards too... only time will tell.

*edit* Who the hell is Big G and why am I their agony aunt?
 

russell

FH is my second home
Joined
Apr 6, 2008
Messages
1,898
You apologized.. what more can you do?
It´s her move now. If she´s a friend, then she will come back. Although, of course, there IS no such thing as "friendship" between a man and a woman. Or so they say. :)

Do you think men and women can be 'just friends', or is there always an underlying sexual tension?
:D
Interesting to get a male point of view..hmmmmm
 

echome

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Feb 19, 2004
Messages
1,609
Do you think men and women can be 'just friends', or is there always an underlying sexual tension?
:D
Interesting to get a male point of view..hmmmmm

I think men and women can be just friends. Why shouldnt they?
I got 2 "girlfriends" from way back and there has never been anything...
 

old.Tohtori

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 23, 2004
Messages
45,210
Do you think men and women can be 'just friends', or is there always an underlying sexual tension?
:D
Interesting to get a male point of view..hmmmmm

Can, ofcourse.

There's always the sexual tension at first, because, well, man want woman want man, but, it fades rather quickly in my opinion.

One problem is, that most(had to add) women treat friendships like relationships. I say "problem", because it does have good points, but when they get pissed off, damn they act like you're their hubby :eek6:

Also, problem is that every woman thinks, because of those lovely bootyhunter men, that every man wants to get in their pants.
 

Mey

Part of the furniture
Joined
Apr 9, 2005
Messages
4,252
The problem with men and women relationships (as "friends") is it always ends up getting messy. You spend so much time with someone that is your prefered "sexual" gender (didn't want people to moan at me about gays and such) then I reckon its only natural your going to get more attracted to them..
 

soze

I am a FH squatter
Joined
Jan 22, 2004
Messages
12,508
A really good friend male for femail should know you well enough to know what you said meant nothing so must be a missunderstanding. The fact she has reacted to it at all shows she is not a good friend.

I say silly shit all the time that can be taken wrong but if you know the way i think its not mean its just a laugh all my friends get that and accept it.
 

russell

FH is my second home
Joined
Apr 6, 2008
Messages
1,898
Can, ofcourse.

There's always the sexual tension at first, because, well, man want woman want man, but, it fades rather quickly in my opinion.

One problem is, that most(had to add) women treat friendships like relationships. I say "problem", because it does have good points, but when they get pissed off, damn they act like you're their hubby :eek6:

Also, problem is that every woman thinks, because of those lovely bootyhunter men, that every man wants to get in their pants.

Sounds like it will be fine between you.:D She just needs time to be pissed off.

You've said sorry -just leave her be. There is nothing more annoying when you are angry with someone and they are texting and calling you.

She will soon come round and want to hang out with you again.:D

You can kiss and make up! (only joking).

I asked the Q cos I have man friends, some who i have hung out with for years and its fine.

I like male company, but I love my husband -who is really excepting of my man friends (some of them are more like a bunch of old women anyway!)

Gender shouldn't come into it, its whether you get on and find each other interesting.:D
 

russell

FH is my second home
Joined
Apr 6, 2008
Messages
1,898
The problem with men and women relationships (as "friends") is it always ends up getting messy. You spend so much time with someone that is your prefered "sexual" gender (didn't want people to moan at me about gays and such) then I reckon its only natural your going to get more attracted to them..

Maybe Im just a pigdog!
 

Binky the Bomb

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jan 31, 2004
Messages
1,897
People, friends or not, can be stubborn. She'll come around eventually, given time, but if its left to fester then it'll be harder for the both of you to carry on as normal.

If it is just a misunderstanding, then you'd better knock it on the head quick. Send her a message, explain again apologise sincerly. Then its upto her to make the next move.
 

old.Tohtori

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 23, 2004
Messages
45,210
People, friends or not, can be stubborn. She'll come around eventually, given time, but if its left to fester then it'll be harder for the both of you to carry on as normal.

If it is just a misunderstanding, then you'd better knock it on the head quick. Send her a message, explain again apologise sincerly. Then its upto her to make the next move.

Thing is, i did it once, after which i got a "you're like this and this and do this and", a real ripping, after which i calmly explained i was sorry for the misunderstanding and how it was a misunderstanding, and that i'd try to keep it in mind in the future.

And i don't apologize for nothing usually, this time, did it twice even if felt like it wasn't my fault.

the thing that doesn't bother is the "getting mad", sure, go ahead, but when they throw in a judgment and accusations, it gets nasty real quick.
 

Binky the Bomb

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jan 31, 2004
Messages
1,897
The problem is your a man, so its obviously our fault. All we have to do is take the abuse with good grace then ask them "Do you want to throw away years of good friendship over this?" and when they say NO, ask "Then what do we do to solve this?" If it means taking more abuse, then do so, and work it from there.

I've had similare from a few women I know, its a phase you seem to go through every 4 years or so with them. It a bit like marrage. Your commited to them, but you don't get any of the usual perks.
 

old.Tohtori

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 23, 2004
Messages
45,210
The problem is your a man, so its obviously our fault. All we have to do is take the abuse with good grace then ask them "Do you want to throw away years of good friendship over this?" and when they say NO, ask "Then what do we do to solve this?" If it means taking more abuse, then do so, and work it from there.

I've had similare from a few women I know, its a phase you seem to go through every 4 years or so with them. It a bit like marrage. Your commited to them, but you don't get any of the usual perks.

No offense to others, to take anything away from the advice, but i've known this lady 4 year'ish now and that's exactly what i thought of doing.

Binky the fortune Teller :D
 

soze

I am a FH squatter
Joined
Jan 22, 2004
Messages
12,508
I have plenty of friends who are girls and i watch a film at least once a week with a girl i have known for about 18 years and it is brilliant as it lets me watch films i could not watch otherwise ;)
 

Eeben

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jan 7, 2004
Messages
3,607
I have plenty of friends who are girls and i watch a film at least once a week with a girl i have known for about 18 years and it is brilliant as it lets me watch films i could not watch otherwise ;)

and you never ever wantet to try anything?
I always had alot of female friends and fooled my self into beliveing i only wantet to be friends when i reallly just wantet to fuck them.
 

Blackjack

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jan 4, 2004
Messages
2,540
Do you think men and women can be 'just friends', or is there always an underlying sexual tension?
:D
Interesting to get a male point of view..hmmmmm

Men and women can be "just friends" even if there is some sort of sexual tension.


When i was at sports college i had a great female friend. We had alot of fun, and even slept in the same bed at times. No fooling around or anything, actual sleeping.
Until one night, i woke up with her kinda fondling my stomach, and then sliding her hand down my pants.
Not knowing what to make of it... i just pretended that i was still asleep :p
We never hooked up, and remained friends throughout our stay.

Innocent flirting with a friend of the opposite sex is fun. (Not when they are with their bf/gf ofc) it doesn't have to mean anything. As long as both parties know that it's just words. And that no physical relations are to take place :p

Casual friendship is easy between men and women. It's when they become very close friends, and spend alot of time alone, just the two of them. That One side will usually either have, or develop, an attraction. Not that this has to escalate, or destroy a relationship.
 

Nate

FH is my second home
Joined
Mar 13, 2004
Messages
7,454
See, now I reckon she just wanted to shag you BJ and you never let it happen so she "remained friends" to cover. Seriously, I am a friendship-relationship expert got my Doctorate right here.
 

soze

I am a FH squatter
Joined
Jan 22, 2004
Messages
12,508
and you never ever wantet to try anything?
I always had alot of female friends and fooled my self into beliveing i only wantet to be friends when i reallly just wantet to fuck them.

I went though a stage when i was about 16 and she had boobs but nah im happy we are friends. When she shows up in short skirts or low cut tops i stare but that can't be helped and was established as a rule many years ago :)
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Top Bottom