DAoC - The true 'Drop Dead'

[DroP DeaD]

Dear DAoC memebers,

I got talking to someone in DAoC the other night and we had a great conversation and it has ended up with her basically fixing my life (I knew it needed done anyway). So to start there are some times I have to tell you all. First off 'Drop Dead' (me) is not a girl. I am infact a 16 year old boy. I know at this point most of you are thinking 'god thats sick', 'why do it?' I know its sick or stupid and I will explain all. Really I dont care if any of you hate me now coz I know what I did was wrong, and stupid and a whole pile of others things. But mostly all of what I have told anyone in DAoC is true.

I will not say the girl who I talked to that made me do this but when we were talking, I decided she is a nice girl, her life sounds the same as mine (shit) and I really need someone to actualy help me with it so I confided in her and told her the truth, she doesnt hate me and is still talking to me. Things I have told any of you will be true apart from a few obvious things.

Now the question of why? Well for the simple reason. My life is shit. I know it is and I admit it is. I have tried to change it for a long time but it just doesnt work for me. There are 'groups' that people fit into in school, I fit into none so I dont go out often and when I do its never out to a party. The only time I have been out partying is when I went on holiday this year and it was the best thing I had ever done. My school is all boys so that makes it even harder for me to meet girls especially not fitting into any of the groups to go out with people and meet some. DAoC was a new chaper for me. I could do whatever I wanted and people wouldnt know any different. I played the game as myself for a time and found it boring the game wasnt the same and being me (shy) I didnt talk to alot of people so I changed the way things were going. Pretending to be a girl you get so much more attension and people talk to you more. Friendships mean alot to me. I was bullied in Primary school and hated all those fuckers and still dream about kicking their heads in for making my life hell. But in 2ndry my life has got better but I still dont have any really good friendships apart from my friend John who I have known for over 7 years. Yes I am basically telling you my life story but its the only way to explain this all. Where I live in N.Ireland is shit. People expect you to believe in things like people being of different religions are hated just because of it. Im not 1 of them, I think people who judge someone just because of their beliefs is a fking idiot in my eyes.

Really I cant think of anything to say. Apart from I'll soon find out who still likes me or not but really I dont care because what I did was a mistake. I will accept any questions any of you want to ask me but I will just ignore any 'oh your sick' replys or anything like. I am planning on closing the account with Drop Dead on it so I can finaly get my life sorted out. I have tried before to sort my life, go out, party, get a gf, but it hasnt worked. The person I told the other night reacted fine she was cool about it and I respect her because of that and because her life seems just like mine, I can only hope you are all the same about it. I dont know when I will cancel my account but it will be soon (next few weeks), if I dont, my life is fked. And believe me I never wanted to end up stuck infront of the compute but with my life is the way it is untill I get my ass out of the house and live it before its to late.

Anyway to much to read. Any questions welcome. PM me in game, on BW, and I think I have my fake Yahoo and MSN accounts on here so you can look them up and ask me there.

Anyway, prob for most of you have a good life I hope to improve mine and ask your self the 1 question. Are you really happy being stuck in that game? I knew I wasnt but I had no way out.

-Doug

 

[Mishy]

i bet you will find most of the peeps playing female chars are really male... all part of the roleplay i guess, so cant really see a problem;d

ofc, we alreayd knew this, since ya friend, still in guild told us ages ago, even though you denied it each time someone mentioned it

Hope ya get yaself sorted anyway, its just a game afterall.

 

[Coim-]

Well, that must have took courage. It's not really a big deal, plenty of people out there playing female chars, acting like a girl... etc. Besides... it's not like it's a crime or anything. Speaking of crimes... Barney as an avatar?

 

[iantheace]

Hmm

Dude, people respect u just as much whther u are m / f. N/I aint as bad as u make out. They have nice metal concerts there, BASTARDS .

TBH if u quit daoc its cus ur the fucked up person, not being able to control urself on game time. not reversed.

Ur life isnt shit and ur really selfish to claim it. <Whine> im a 16 yr old and i feel sorry for myself. Get real. Ur life is better than most peoples. Life is hardly great going out and getting drunk or whatever.

Finding ur call in life is important. Mine is music. With the right song life is allways good. Current faves are :

Blind Guardian - Blood Tears
Iron Maiden - Rainmaker

amazing songs

anyway, i prolly spend all of my money going to concerts wherever. The days in between them blend together like an intervall in my life.


You tell me we can stop the rain, you tell me that we all can change, you tell me we can find something to wash the tears away

 

[Tilda]

Awwww bless, that honestly brought a tear to my eye.
You can allways come out with me m8
And youve got gut's i'll give you that

Tilda

 

[Edohadien]

wow.
dont know what to say other then ur right.
this game wil in the end ruin ur life. and the faster people leav it the better. And to ur problem pretending ur a girl. If it made u fell better Plz pretend ur a girl again. and feck what everybody else wants u to do its ur life its ur rules..
go out smell the roses u will enjoy it..

Good luck with your life m8 i hope that in the end everyting will fall into place

 

[Chuffy]

Maybe you could ask John to tea bag you.

 

[gunner440]

how sweet



:wub: <---- private msg to tilda

 

[Karnage]

Re: Hmm

Originally posted by iantheace
Life is hardly great going out and getting drunk or whatever.

HAH!

LIES I TELL YOU! LIES!!

**goes to bitch at Ian on MSN**


If anyone doesn't like you pretending to be a girl, its their problem.

I stopped playing for a month, and started going out regularly with my mates again.

Now i'm playing again, in moderation. Feel like I have a nice balance between RL and computer life now.


Good luck sorting yourself out

 

[DroP DeaD]

Re: Hmm

Originally posted by Coim-
Speaking of crimes... Barney as an avatar?

Dont worry thats a piss take I use it on my real MSN account lol.

Originally posted by iantheace
Dude, people respect u just as much whther u are m / f. N/I aint as bad as u make out. They have nice metal concerts there, BASTARDS .

TBH if u quit daoc its cus ur the fucked up person, not being able to control urself on game time. not reversed.

Ur life isnt shit and ur really selfish to claim it. <Whine> im a 16 yr old and i feel sorry for myself. Get real. Ur life is better than most peoples. Life is hardly great going out and getting drunk or whatever.

Finding ur call in life is important. Mine is music. With the right song life is allways good. Current faves are :

Blind Guardian - Blood Tears
Iron Maiden - Rainmaker

amazing songs

anyway, i prolly spend all of my money going to concerts wherever. The days in between them blend together like an intervall in my life.


You tell me we can stop the rain, you tell me that we all can change, you tell me we can find something to wash the tears away

Nice concerts yes, Aint bad? Even I live in the good part of N.Ire up north not much happens... and yet 3 Belfast ppl came and kicked the hell out of a guy in my geo class and left him in the sea hes then in hospital for over 2weeks.

Who said to go out and get drunk? Thats 1 thing I dont want to do at all, or atleast often, for personal reasons. I want to go out and enjoy myself as much as posible not be stuck on a computer.

And believe me it is shit

:Cough: Iron Maiden - Wickerman

 

[Coim-]

Originally posted by Tilda
Awwww bless, that honestly brought a tear to my eye.
You can allways come out with me m8
And youve got gut's i'll give you that

Tilda

See what I mean? Acts like a girl... plays female chars, no one cares. xDDDD

 

[Ala]

Hi Drop

I don't know u but I have spoken to Drop w one of my alts and I love infils and BIG respect to the infils that ding 50

After reading your post I thought 'Wow that show's great courage' and you know I was 16 once and things will change for you and your emotions will settle down as you get a few years older. Best piece of advice I can give you is 'Just say no to drugs' I guess that sounds preachy but believe me if you think of gettting wasted to pass through your uncomfortable stages in life, you're ripping yourself off from the experience of moving through the tough times and coming out the other side a stronger and wiser peep

Leveling an infil to 50 is a tough job imo and if I were you I wouldn't delete her. Damn I always loved her name and thought she looked awsome .. she is awsome!! Don't delete please! For the love of God no!!!!!!

Check out the majority of the posts in reply to yours m8, people resapect your honesty and admire your courage... those are great attributes to have

All the best Doug, take care of u

 

[Khalen]

There's a time for everything. Be patient...

 

[**Aligro**]

Re: Hmm

Originally posted by iantheace
. Life is hardly great going out and getting drunk or whatever.

dear god take that back

 

[VodkaFairy]

It's very brave to say that doug, I hope you get things sorted.

 

[Dardamein]

Ye always been great Drop. There are a lot of excuses for playing a female character. Not that I, the roleplayer,have anything against it. But here is my favourite statement of why HE only played female chars.

"I would not stand watching a guys arse all the time"

Ye ye you know who you are

Come sing a song with us

 

[leoric]

Originally posted by Dardamein
"I would not stand watching a guys arse all the time"

Thank god for /bow! Nice when you got a female char

 

[Xethron]

“Life is not a 100m sprint it’s a marathon”.

Not short, not a clear strait run with a well defined finish line but a journey with many ups and downs, maybe some blind corners and some slippery parts however ultimately the outlook of a greater goal - running that race to finish on top, with people all around you, at some running along side with you, others at the side line encouraging you and cheering you onwards.

What you wrote to some real guts, I know I have been much on the outside of what has happened, whatever the fine detail none of it is important now, what is important that you move on and let all that all go.

You have already made the first step by talking with your friend and posting here, keep on going :-] I’ll be one of the crowd cheering you on from the sidelines your friends in and out of game (the ppl running along side you) I am sure are there for you

Again /salute for you honesty and I am sure that the pieces of the puzzle will come together in time, don’t give up, you can have all the time you need - no one is standing over you with a clock counting


All the best.

 

[Tilda]

Originally posted by Coim-
See what I mean? Acts like a girl... plays female chars, no one cares. xDDDD

But I have np admitting im male in RL so whats your point?

 

[elbeek]

I tell ya wot Drops, you have got balls but tbh there is nothing wrong with playing as a female, I know loads who do.

It sounds like all you need irl is a bit of confidence, well that comes with time. Dont get too hung up about " not fitting in ", you will find your niche in due course (omg I sound like an agony aunt here ).

Teens are mega tough for most people, it gets easier but then u get major things happening, marriage, divorce, kids, death of friends etc, so enjoy yourself.

IMHO try and put things in perspective, some pretty shit things have happened to me, but as the old cliche goes, there is always someone worse off than yourself.

 

[Coim-]

Originally posted by Tilda
But I have np admitting im male in RL so whats your point?

Tild0r, like... joke. ^^

 

[Tilda]

Originally posted by elbeek
I tell ya wot Drops, you have got balls but tbh there is nothing wrong with playing as a female, I know loads who do.

It sounds like all you need irl is a bit of confidence, well that comes with time. Dont get too hung up about " not fitting in ", you will find your niche in due course (omg I sound like an agony aunt here ).

Teens are mega tough for most people, it gets easier but then u get major things happening, marriage, divorce, kids, death of friends etc, so enjoy yourself.

IMHO try and put things in perspective, some pretty shit things have happened to me, but as the old cliche goes, there is always someone worse off than yourself.

Listen to Uncle Beeker tbh. His words are wize
You'll find your place in life. Just like that monkey in the Lion King says.
Confidence will come with time, you just have to be yourlself, if people cant accept you for what you are, then its their loss.

Tilda

/edit Lion king rather than Loin king

 

[Coim-]

Originally posted by Tilda

/edit Lion king rather than Loin king

Lol, I was going to point that out. Loin King sounded a bit... well... gay tbh.

 

[Loth]

woah, coming out on BW - brave of you . . .

I remember duoing Cruachan Gorge with you once or twice, good luck to you in whatever you decide to do

You're only 16, trust me it gets worse








joke !!!! :great:

 

[Tilda]

Originally posted by Loth
woah, coming out on BW - brave of you . . .

I dont think he said he was gay, just that he was male irl?

 

[DroP DeaD]

Originally posted by Coim-
Lol, I was going to point that out. Loin King sounded a bit... well... gay tbh.

...

Originally posted by Loth
woah, coming out on BW - brave of you . . .

so does that tbh lol

 

[Loth]

Originally posted by DroP DeaD
...



so does that tbh lol

heheh sorry mate, I didn't mean it to sound like a gay outing

I just think it's very brave of you to post this on BW

I dont think he said he was gay, just that he was male irl?

C'mon Tilda, this is about Drop, not you...

 

[gunner440]

its ok to be gay?

 

[Tilda]

Originally posted by Loth
C'mon Tilda, this is about Drop, not you...

Yes, and?
Your post made it sound like he was gay, I was pointing out that he hadn't said that.
If that was a poke at me, it didnt work, im not gay.

 

[Cap'n Sissyfoo]

So...is this another "I'm quitting...so long and thanks for all the fish!" posts or what? I wish people would be more considerate and have a little summary of their post at the end.

-=summary=-

Cap'n doesn't know what's going on in this thread. Needs explanation pronto!