Contest - Best Whine/Flame in Haiku form

Killswitch

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 29, 2004
Messages
1,584
I'm bored at work, so I thought I'd set a little competition going. To enter, you need to write either a flame or a whine (no names please!) in Haiku form.

(WTF is a Haiku?!?!?!?)


I'll get the ball rolling with a couple;

Green grass of Emain
Is two inches from my nose
Vamp killed me again

---

Three chambered lifetaps
Floating balls of insta-death
What were Mythic on?

---

Don't add FFS
Zerg thunders by like stampede
How many scouts there?!?!?

---

Oh no bolt-range mezz
Waiting for the assist train
Might go get Purge 3

---

Have fun :D
 

Fana

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Dec 23, 2003
Messages
2,181
Watching over walls,
Floating balls hitting me hard
And I curse out loud
 

Infanity

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Sep 22, 2004
Messages
3,774
Im sitting in pain,
Wanting someone to explain,
What am i supposed to do here ?
 

Fana

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Dec 23, 2003
Messages
2,181
Infanity said:
Im sitting in pain,
Wanting someone to explain,
What am i supposed to do here ?

Haiku needs to be constructed in 5, 7, 5 syllable lines, so your last line is too long :) Also, you should not use more than one colon, punctuation, dash etc (there should be 2 parts to a haiku, and no more than 2 parts). And to be really correct it also needs to have a seasonal word in it somewhere to describe when it takes place, although that will be hard in a daoc-haiku ^^
 

pjuppe

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
May 31, 2004
Messages
2,052
Killswitch said:
I'm bored at work, so I thought I'd set a little competition going. To enter, you need to write either a flame or a whine (no names please!) in Haiku form.

(WTF is a Haiku?!?!?!?)


I'll get the ball rolling with a couple;

Green grass of Emain
Is two inches from my nose
Vamp killed me again

---

Three chambered lifetaps
Floating balls of insta-death
What were Mythic on?

---

Don't add FFS
Zerg thunders by like stampede
How many scouts there?!?!?

---

Oh no bolt-range mezz
Waiting for the assist train
Might go get Purge 3

---

Have fun :D


:worthy: :worthy: :worthy:
 
N

Nymrin

Guest
Traditional
(5) Vampiirs and Warlocks
(7) Easymode RP-farming
(5) Mythic, WTF?

Unconventional
(5) Two OP classes
(5) Sitting in a tree
(7) N E R F, Puh-Lease

I'm really not all this childish about it, but it made the haikus, I enjoy RvR and I find both Warlocks and Vampiirs to be a dangerous yet a fun challenge to kill. I hope they get a minor tweak though, so that they won't have the upperhand in all the battles and instead bring it down closer to the more justified 50/50 where some sort of skill should play a role.
 

Killswitch

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 29, 2004
Messages
1,584
Nymrin said:
Traditional
(5) Vampiirs and Warlocks
(7) Easymode RP-farming
(5) Mythic, WTF?

Unconventional
(5) Two OP classes
(5) Sitting in a tree
(7) N E R F, Puh-Lease

I'm really not all this childish about it, but it made the haikus, I enjoy RvR and I find both Warlocks and Vampiirs to be a dangerous yet a fun challenge to kill. I hope they get a minor tweak though, so that they won't have the upperhand in all the battles and instead bring it down closer to the more justified 50/50 where some sort of skill should play a role.
Nice poetry and nice whine, ruined by making a balanced and logical point at the end!!! Poor show imo...

:D

---

Perfect whine Haiku
Then sense and logic employed
Why would you do that?
 
N

Nymrin

Guest
Oh, and ofcourse:

(5) Radar's obvious
(7) Players "home in" like missiles
(5) Pathetic players

Along with

(5) For every time
(7) You're using Radar to cheat
(5) God kills a kitten

Words of most Zen!
 

Killswitch

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 29, 2004
Messages
1,584
Safety of stone walls
Rest with battle on far side
Arrrrgh Bainshee, slash release
 
N

Nymrin

Guest
Invalid argument-exception: Not written in the form of a Haiku!

Point taken though. ;) I'm no experienced whiner, I need practice.
 

Killswitch

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 29, 2004
Messages
1,584
Nymrin said:
Invalid argument-exception: Not written in the form of a Haiku!

Point taken though. ;) I'm no experienced whiner, I need practice.
I thought you might say something like that, so I added Japanese subtitles to the post;

Killswitch said:
Perfect whine Haiku
Then sense and logic employed
Why would you do that?
HTH
 

Svartmetall

Great Unclean One
Joined
Jan 5, 2004
Messages
2,467
Mincers, Sorcs, Bainshees
and Scouts fear not the nerf bat
Because they're not Mids

:p
 

Killswitch

FH is my second home
Joined
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Messages
1,584
Svartmetall said:
Mincers, Sorcs, Bainshees
and Scouts fear not the nerf bat
Because they're not Mids

:p

Axe Spec is rubbish
Why can't you just face the facts
And respec hammer?

Sorry Svart...love reading your VN posts though :D
 

Svartmetall

Great Unclean One
Joined
Jan 5, 2004
Messages
2,467
Lameness in the game
Reflects the size of e-peen
Real life peen is gone.

-----

Here is the cycle:
Port get ganked and then release
QQ on FH

-----

Red slash in the air
Yellow bar diminishes
Mythic smiles on Hibs

-----

Albs in our tower
Everyone is saying Z
Mythic, please nerf Sorcs

-----

Skeletons surround
Lifetap is most annoying
One more Mythic gem

-----

Raid leader screaming
"FFS turn off the pets!"
Framerate is reduced

-----

Clever man knows this
Cherish closeness to healer
When con is purple.
 

Svartmetall

Great Unclean One
Joined
Jan 5, 2004
Messages
2,467
Killswitch said:
Axe Spec is rubbish
Why can't you just face the facts
And respec hammer?

Sorry Svart...love reading your VN posts though :D

Here is Troll wisdom
Sword is so over-rated!
(smart Troll loves big axe)

:cheers:
 

Deepflame

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jun 16, 2004
Messages
1,440
Walking down the hill
Purple flash stops my footsteps
Death comes swiftly now

Shot my arrow
Took him down to 10 percent
Back inside he went
 

Svartmetall

Great Unclean One
Joined
Jan 5, 2004
Messages
2,467
Pieces of paper
Dropped from deceased purple con
Never the right one

-----

Tiny bubbles rise
Message to the observant
Potion is required

-----

Shiny bauble doth
Require many more of same
To reach tenth level

-----

Small stone signifies
On site of vanished repose
Rent has not been paid

-----

In-game map required
To navigate without death
In enormous cave

-----

Large sword is glowing
Struggle with quest monster for
Object of desire

-----

Screen devouring life
Someone please deliver us
From pixellated crack
 

Killswitch

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 29, 2004
Messages
1,584
Svartmetall said:
-----

Large sword is glowing
Struggle with quest monster for
Object of desire

-----

Sword?!?!? HERESY! KILL THE BLASPHEMER!!!
 

Deepflame

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jun 16, 2004
Messages
1,440
Small mistake just once
Missed a throw and off he went
New generator
 

Killswitch

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 29, 2004
Messages
1,584
Yoda/Luri Haiku

When 50 you are
Pwn this hard you will not hmmm?
Small and green am I...
 

Deepflame

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jun 16, 2004
Messages
1,440
One, two, three, four, five,
Dracula has been busy.
Six, Seven, eight, nine.
 

Killswitch

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 29, 2004
Messages
1,584
Pimplock and Pimpiir
Are two very stupid names
That I just made up

Deepflame - you're right! Count Pimpula must be at it 24/7 to spawn such a vamp zerg. TBH there are almost as many wannabe vamps around in DAOC as you'd find at a University student bar Rock Night.
 

rampant

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
May 7, 2004
Messages
1,565
Deepflame said:
Walking down the hill
Purple flash stops my footsteps
Death comes swiftly now

my favorite :):worthy:

have :drink: pint on me


"drinking water pot
counting down for an hour
will I last that long?"
 

Killswitch

FH is my second home
Joined
Jan 29, 2004
Messages
1,584
I think the ultimate challenge would be a limerick...the rigid structure makes it really hard to come up with something that doesn't sound crap. I'm really struggling tbh

Flim's Hammer of Banz0r was feared
By n00bs acting rude or just weird
He locked posts that flamed
Whilst smiting in-game
And hoped his buffs didn't get sheared

---

A Haiku contest was declared
Freddys readers were quite unprepared
Flames and whines in a pile
In the Japanese style
Until no class, realm or spec had been spared

See? Just dreadful :(
 

Andrilyn

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Feb 1, 2004
Messages
1,965
There once was a Sorc named Vlad
He thought he was good but played very bad
Refusing each rez
He was affraid to confess
That the only skill he had was to add
 

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