get up early. Put Turkey in Oven. cook rest of stuff. carve Turkey. put on plate. sit at table. pull crackers. tell crap cracker jokes. be amused with crappy plastic cracker prize. put flammable paper hat on. (hope no open flames are about) eat food. (drink lots) eat more food. (and drink) eat pudding. (drink more) feel sick. play Trivial Pursuit. play monopoly. Domestic ''Incident'' get driven around by the Police. get Bailed out. Home. Bed.