Stupidest film logic evah!

[Lester]

Originally posted by Scooba Da Bass


Yup, he saves the universe by using the untested DEATH BLOSSOM MOVE, where the ship spins in one spot and blows everything ever up, WAY TO GO GUYS WHY NOT JUST DO THAT AT THE START?

This made me think about Men In Black 2. The snakey woman slices that guy in two right at the beginning yet waves Will Smith around for a good 5 minutes at the end trying to kill him? This stuff really annoys me.

Got any more?

 

[old.milou]

Most James Bond movies?

As Doctor Evil's son says "Why not just shoot him in the head?"

Ah the suspension of disbelief! But I agree about MiB2

 

[Tom]

http://www.intuitor.com/moviephysics/

 

[leggy]

That website is borderline pedantic.

There is absolutely no need to explain how potential energy is translated into kinetic energy in order to point out that falling is bad.

 

[Scooba Da Bass]

Evolution

We are made from Carbon and X kills us, we get to X by moving in a L shape. The creatures are mode of Xylophonium (or whatever) so if we move down in an L we should get what kills them; Element Y...the problem is where do we get it?

*Up pop the fugly twins*

WE USE ANTI DANDRUFF SHAMPOO AND ALTHOUGH WE CAN'T READ OR WRITE WE KNOW THAT ELEMENT Y IS IN IT HUZZAH FOR US

*Lead characters look at each other*

Lets do it

*Everyone in the cinema shouts*

WHY NOT TEST YOUR STUPID HYPOTHESIS ON THAT CREATURE SITTING IN YOUR SINK I MEAN SURELY IT'S WORTH TESTING IT OUT, I MEAN IT MIGHT NOT WORK!

 

[Lester]

Alien/Aliens. I love these films, love 'em. But.....

MIIB syndrome. There's one in the first one that kills 'em all and yet in the second there's dozens, which seem to be easier to kill. I suppose they got fat and lazy in the intervening 47 yrs or something?

 

[Moving Target]

Well maybe seeing as in Alien they didnt really have any rifles, and only a flamethrower?

 

[Lester]

o.k. bad example.


Oceans 11 then. George Clooney gets beaten up for, like, an hour.

 

[doh_boy]

Originally posted by Lester
o.k. bad example.


Oceans 11 then. George Clooney gets beaten up for, like, an hour.

Didn't he organise that, in other words the guy 'beating him up' was pretending.....I can't remember I wasn't paying attention

 

[nath]

He did, it's just that they left him in there getting beaten up there for ages, well it was actually the bigfella chucking himself around the room. Hmmmm

 

[Testin da Cable]

Originally posted by Lester
Alien/Aliens. I love these films, love 'em. But.....

MIIB syndrome. There's one in the first one that kills 'em all and yet in the second there's dozens, which seem to be easier to kill. I suppose they got fat and lazy in the intervening 47 yrs or something?

I loved the autocannons to bits in Aliens. Loved em! and that dropship. brilliant!

too bad they went all pear after though. I mean...3 had it's moments, but...

 

[leggy]

I'm sure lester was being sarcastic about clooney guys. Everyone knows he organised the beating.

Ok put it this way, if he wasn't being sarcastic then he's thicker than he is ugly.

 

[bodhi]

Dune.















As in, the whole damn film.

 

[PR.]

Well I can win this one straight out.

Hollowman.

The bit were he is sneaking up on the two survivors, a fire has broken out and the sprinklers are soaking the small corridor that our heroes are standing in. Hollowman sneaks up behind them but is discovered cos they can see water running off him. Fighting ensues. Eventually our hollowman hits a power point wires touch the water and kill hollowman as he stands in the electrified water, 2 meters away our heroes standing in the same electrified water but go un harmed...

 

[Daffeh]

heh never known how Hollowman ended.
After the woman made some weapon/tool thing to escape a la The A-Team, i turned it off
cant remember as it was so crap

 

[caLLous]

Female cannon fodder's laughable moves in horror movies.

And doh_boy, pay attention to Ocean's 11, it's great.

 

[Lester]

Yes. Thankyou. I knew George organised the beating, I was saying that he was beaten up for an hour(sigh, or pretended to). I mean, the only person I know who could survive a beating for more than 30 minutes is leggy. And that's if he beats himself. And that's only if it's the fifth of the day (Sundays).

The other thing about Hollow Man was the rape. He thinks he can rape coz he's invisible but he would still be discovered form his fingerprints and DNA. I mean his DNA would be all over her. On her face, up her back, up her oh....... (on the telly )

 

[doh_boy]

he wouldn't able to see if he was invisible either.

 

[stu]

Ocean's 11 - He gets beaten up for about 20 minutes, "film time". What's the big deal about that? People get tortured for hours/days and live, it's not exactly a stretch of the imagination to think someone could withstand a few punches from a fat bald biker, *especially* when (if you buy the cover story) the biker's just trying to rough him up, not kill him.

Alien - The first one took apart an untrained unarmed 6(?) man crew who had never seen one of these things before over the course of a day. In Aliens they had a variety of military hardware, and were (allegedly) marines. And yet most of them still got killed anyway.

Hollow Man - DNA's all very good, but it's useless to actually catch someone. There's no national database of DNA. It's generally just used to confirm identity once a suspect has been caught. And he doesn't think he'll get caught, coz he's invisible. Alles klaar?

You're 0 for 3

 

[Lester]

No I am 1-4 (Men IN Black 2)

 

[leggy]

Ok ... hollow man.

Hollow man or the invisible man would be focking blind!

The front of your eyes act as lenses. These lenses focus light from the outside world onto your retinas. The fact that you can't see the slightest bit of distortion around the invisible man's facial/eye area means that no light is getting bent (i.e eyes now have the same refractive index as the surrounding air). Which ultimately means he cannot see!

I aer t eh Sighentist!!!!

 

[Lester]

Glen fs.

 

[leggy]

I thought I was being l337 coming up with that

 

[PR.]

Awww

Mine wasn't disproved tho

 

[-Ultimate]

XXX where he jumps out a plane, snowboards down a mountain in front of an avalance he created all to take out some stupid antenna tower and nearly kill himself in the process. Just bomb it or sommat!!

 

[whipped]

Lord of the Rings. All this time trying to destroy the One Ring. Why not just get Gandalf to get one of the flying things that rescued him to kamakazie right into the fire pit thingy. Or get Leggless to fire an arrow in with the ring tied to it.

 

[Wij]

Why not cunt the fuck off and die of a grazed knee eh ???











oops

 

[Durzel]

Mission Impossible:

Ethan sending an email to "Job@Job 3:14". Not sure where that email is going, but one presumes back to postmaster after its deemed undeliverable!

It was quite comical when he searched for "job" on "Usenet" as well. No matches? Interesting.

Jurassic Park:

The whole "this is UNIX, I know this" thing, navigating around one presumes, "the kernel" (a lower budget kernel than that found in Hackers) by clicking on big boxes. Of course, this error pales into insignificance when you consider the PC is clearly an Apple.

Independance Day

Infecting an alien system with a computer virus, written by a human with zero knowledge of the alien technology. Nuff said.

Computer related stuff seems to always be among the worst cases of stupid film logic.

 

[nath]

Hackers was alright if you took it to all be stylised computer screens rather than actually what it was meant to be. Because of course it wasn't saying "this is what the computar screen looks like to a hax0r!!" it was relaying the fact that they were browsing the system aimlessly etc.

Still. Shit film.


p.s. how come angelina jolies tits were mini in it, but she actually has quiet reasonably sized funpillows

 

[Durzel]

Probably because she was young then.