Misc (rantish) How clean is your house?

[Raven]

I have a stag weekend this weekend and about 5 people are staying over. The wife demanded that I clean the place up first while she was at work - I thought it was ok until I started cleaning. I sort of got really into it and started tidying cupboards up and so far I have filled a large bin bag with junk.

I am frankly amazed at the amount of crap we have lying around that we don't want or need that just gets put away never to be thought about again. The magazine rack was brimming with my wifes childcare magazines, going back to last year. cobwebs behind the TV, dust all over the back of the TV. Unbelievable, we are far from clean freaks but we hoover a couple of times a week and I always make sure my kitchen is spotless because I prepare most of our food fresh.

When I first moved in with my now wife 12 or so years ago I had a rucksack and a bin bag of clothes, I have always joked that I could move out with the same. But now I am not sure!

What's yours like? Do you live in a tip or does it sparkle?

 

[CorNokZ]

My house looks okay.. It's a mess, but it is clean. My gf explodes when she comes home from school or work. Hand bag usually thrown in the hallway, jacket somewhere in the kitchen, shoes off in the living room and pantyhose off in the bathroom

Can't change it. Tried, but it is like talking to a door

 

[Lamp]

I gotta say our house is generally spotless, with 3 exceptions

1. The garden shed. Imagine a rabid tiger with a firework up its arse on roller skates inside a china shop.
2. My computer area. Messy. Bits of chocolate on the worksurface. Needs a dust & clean.
3. Where I sit at the kitchen table after I've eaten. Our kitchen is usually spotless (you've seen the pics), but I can be a messy eater. Especially when gravy's involved. Sometimes I have to put on an old T-shirt.

 

[Gumbo]

I have a 4 and a half year old. Our bedroom is clean and tidy, the kitchen is clean and tidy, the rest of the house is a bombsite.

 

[Wazzerphuk]

The gf's been away for a week so it's actually clean and not messy for once.

That'll change when she's back. Women are far messier than men in my experience. It's also been great not finding hair EVERYFUCKINGWHERE

 

[Lamp]

The good things when they bugger off for a few days:

1. You can crap with the bathroom door open
2. You can find your razor
3. The bathroom doesn't have 600 bottles of shampoo & god knows what else
4. Shit shave shower & out the door in minutes. No waiting 2 hours for her to do her hair & choose what to wear
5. Re-discover internet porn
6. You can bring your mates round
7. Don't have to worry about changing your clothes. Boxers are good for a whole weekend
8. Hog the whole bed
9. Open the front door in your pants.
10. Your land-line phone bill drops to zero

 

[rynnor]

We have 3 kids - clean isnt the issue its just the clutter - every few months we have to do a serious de-cluttering or the house would be literally full

 

[Yoni]

We have just moved so currently it is spotless and having a dishwasher really helps. We make sure the living room is clear of shite each night and each Saturday we hoover, dust and mop.

 

[Access Denied]

Pretty much the same as Gumbo. Kitchen, bedroom and bathroom spotless. With a three year old the rest of the house looks like a tornado has gone through it. Five minutes after we've tidied it's a tip again.

That said, same as Lamp here, my computer table is my personal space and it's a fucking mess!

 

[DaGaffer]

I have a two-year old and a baby; the place goes from spotless to warzone in about 30 seconds every time I turn my back. The Au Pair is OCD about cleanliness but it doesn't matter; the kids always win.

 

[old.user4556]

The Au Pair

Please tell me you're slipping her a length?

 

[old.user4556]

Women are far messier than men in my experience. It's also been great not finding hair EVERYFUCKINGWHERE

Absolutely, my missus does not clear up after herself at all and leaves cupboards open, drawers open, wardrobe doors open, and general discarded items of clothes that were being used to "trial outfits". The hair thing is also irritating but there's not a lot can be done about that, I need to take the Dyson to bits once a week and pull all her hair out of it.

 

[Turamber]

Are you tallking about dirt, or having unwanted and unused bric-a-brac around the house? Quite different things. Not much dirt, but lots of crap ... I hoarde stuff, hate throwing things away!

 

[Wazzerphuk]

Are you tallking about dirt, or having unwanted and unused bric-a-brac around the house? Quite different things. Not much dirt, but lots of crap ... I hoarde stuff, hate throwing things away!

 

[Overdriven]

Room is a bomb-site. I use to say the same thing as Raven about being able to move out with a rucksack, but not now.

Moving from a full student house to a house-share (Tied to a room for a few more months) the amount of crap I've collected, which I can't bin, just doesn't fit in this room without looking like a mess. =/

I love living out of suitcases.

 

[Access Denied]

Looks like my grandads place. Never threw any papers or paperwork out.

 

[caLLous]

When I used to live in a shared house my room was an absolute shit-tip. It was probably 25m² and there was literally a path of clear floorspace from the door to desk to bed to shower\sink bit in the corner and back to the door. Shameful times, I'm much more organised now. Dogs = hairs and shizzle everywhere but as for *stuff* it's all blissfully minimalist now.

 

[Lamp]

First year at uni. Now that was a messy house. I suppose landlords must be used to students treating their digs like shite. I guess they can keep the deposit (which the parents put up anyway most likely)

 

[caLLous]

Our kitchen bin was beneath the window. When the bin contents starting to reach the bottom of the net curtain, instead of emptying the bin, we cut strips off the bottom of the curtain.

 

[megadave]

the cleaner keeps it pretty clean tbh

 

[Wij]

Clutter is the big problem. The wife brings bags of stuff home every day and dumps them around the house. She also hates it when I throw things out so I do it in secret

 

[Lamp]

I just can't understand the guy in that pic. I can totally understand not wanting to have a spring clean...but when I finish my roast chicken, I don't pick the remains up and toss the carcass over the back of the sofa and leave it there, or save up 6 months of rubbish and store it in my living room. I can't see me turning round to the Mrs and going: "You know what, luv, I wish we'd kept that milk carton from February 19th last year"...

 

[opticle]

He obviously has a psychiatric or personality disorder. It's mental what some people will live in - the above isn't unique

I'm pretty good with de-cluttering life every so often, even then the amount of *things* you accumulate because you might need them is upsetting. Then you throw them out AND YOU NEED EXACTLY THAT BIT OF WIRE.

I helped my dad clear out some of brother's old stuff from when he was a teenager last weeked seeing as he's been moved out fully for the last 5 years - good God.

Going to a dump with your own car full of things from just a fraction of a year or two of someone's life makes you realise how much pointless transient crap the world consumes for no reason at all - and then tries to bury it.

 

[old.user4556]

The wife brings bags of stuff home every day and dumps them around the house.

I'm glad I'm not the only one. My flat is my flat, the missus pays rent to me until such times we buy a house together - i've banned bags of clutter from appearing so she fills up her car with it.

It's all shite - needless clutter, empty boxes, unopened mail, clothes that she's borrowed from her sister, clothes that she meant to give to her sister.

Don't start me on loads of shoes, our cupboard looks like a holocaust museum.

 

[old.Tohtori]

I'm single, figure it out

If i change clothes, the old go on the floor. As do empty soda bottles, juice boxes and cigarette boxes. Just going to gather them at once every now and then. My place, i don't mind so there's no reason to keep it clean either.

As such, it's rather clean.

 

[Lamp]

As such, it's rather clean.

Eh? You just said the floor was full of crap

 

[old.Tohtori]

Yeap. I also said "as such".

 

[Lamp]

So another way of saying it is "messy but not filthy"?

 

[Ch3tan]

My house is clean, but the amount of clutter I have is ridiculous, over the past year I've slowly been un-cluttering, throwing away loads of crap I've hoarded for no reason.

 

[Lamp]

Then you throw them out AND YOU NEED EXACTLY THAT BIT OF WIRE

qft

sods law. You throw it away, a week later you wish you'd kept it.