Job Interview

[Damini]

I had a job interview earlier on today, and I think I ballsed it up amazingly.

It was in Waterstones book shop, and it's for christmas staff, so I didn't really think there was all that much that could go wrong.

So, I turn up, and the boss invites me in to sit next to him, and then gets a phone call from his wife and he begins having a domestic while I try really hard to look interested in the ceiling. He then hangs up on her in mid sentence, turns round to me and straight out says "So, why do you want to work here?" without pausing for breath.

I mutter something about books, and enjoying working with people, and trotted out the usual banal responses.

Then he threw me a curveball, and said "So tell me Louise, what makes you cry?"

Erm?

Erm....?

"Watership Down" I said, in a fluster, and under his gaze I proceeded to go down a long, blithering and deeply embarrassing discussion about how the sad rabbits upset me and how the red eyed rabbits are evil.

"The book?" he asked

"Oh no, the cartoon!"

God damn. It didn't get much better after that. He asked me my favourite play writes, and I forgot all their names, asked me what I'm crap at and I said "filing things in alphabetical order" (ITS A BOOKSHOP LOUISE) and at the end of the interview he wrote in big letters over my application letter

"NOT BONKERS"

Said that was his grading system , and told me he'd phone me in two weeks.

Arse burgers.

 

[Wij]

Someone needs a fluffle

 

[Embattle]

Made me chuckle, need to brush up on our interview skills

 

[Testin da Cable]

um, reading your account of him I'd hesitate before working for someone who can smoothly translate between irate-to-wife and nice-to-applicant modes. eep!

 

[Jiggs]

he sounds like a psycho, you're better off out of it

 

[~Mobius~]

Indeed, he sounds mental.

Start a agony aunt column, Damini.

*Fluffle*

 

[~Lazarus~]

Originally posted by Damini

Said that was his grading system , and told me he'd phone me in two weeks.

erm..... you shouldnt really plan around being in the house in 2 weeks time

 

[Sharma]

Hehe, very funny Damini, nice chuckle.

 

[Jupitus]

He does sound like a bit of a madman

Best thing to do is try to not concern yourself over it. In my experience this seems to be a poorly conducted interview by some arsehead who just wants to trip people up with smart ass questions... he's probably got a massive phobia of not being as bright as the interviewee (probably a valid one) so sets out to belittle them from the onset of the meeting.

Put it behind you and keep looking, then if they do offer you the job (I know I would) it'll be a nice suprise, and give you the choice of perhaps tellimg him where to stick his job offer

Edit: Forgot the *fluffle*

 

[Clowneh!]

He took a call during an interview? Boooooo!

 

[Jonaldo]

I actually wouldn't mind a boss like that, all mine have been tossers so far Well except for one who I worked with at HSS hire shops but our area manager was a double tosser and regularly came into our shop and forced our manager to be a bastard

 

[SilverHood]

atleast he didn't write "bonkers" on your application

staff with personality, thats what they're after at my local waterstones.

 

[Mellow-]

lol Damini, that guy sounds nuts. Love the hair, hope you win.

 

[dysfunction]

That interview does sound a bit wacky but I wouldnt write off your chances...

He may have liked your answers for all you know...

 

[xane]

I told them Watership Down made me cry too !

As with you, it didn't go down too well with my job interview at Bunnyburgers-R-Us fast food chain.

 

[Yoni]

*flufflez* damini it was a bit of a dodgy question imo and the fact he took a call during the interview as also a little strange. Best off out of it

 

[CAC]

could have been worse though he could have written "ABSOLUTLY BOBBINS" across your aplication form


saying that the last person i interviewd i had to fill the aplication form in for them after they had written thier name and address on it,and amazingly they got the job too

 

[Damini]

Heh.

Damini - Absolutely Bobbins

Has a certain ring to it

We'll see how it goes, but I won't be holding my breath. I was all braced to say my hobbies, and I LIEK BOOKS and so on, but those questions just side swiped me and I ended up looking like a total bell end. Those poor animated rabbits! The humanity!

Mellow, you've thrown me with the hair/winning thing, so cheers I think? Or alternatively Delete as applicable

 

[MYstIC G]

Originally posted by Damini
I had a job interview earlier on today, and I think I ballsed it up amazingly.

*makes lou feel better*

I've got one tomorrow at Ch3tan's Woolworths at 10am. I was supposed to spend this evening preparing for it however life is a total shitbag (literally).

9am: Arrive at work this morning whilst wearing new shoes I've purchased the day before because I didn't really want to wear the pair I already owned to the interview on thursday. Notice "odd smell" as I'm unlocking the door to the basement office, think nothing of it.

10am: Call of nature (1), *flush*, unusual "water level rises" action occours..... great.

10:01am: Water suddenly begins rising out of the two drains right outside the door to the office..... oh fuck yeah, WOO!

10:02am: Other peoples calls of nature (2) begin appearing out of the drainage, large & deep muddy puddle appears.

10:03am: Curse god's name & repeatedly question him with "What the fuck did I do today, huh?"

10:04am: After consulation with "the boss" who's not there suffice to say it is decided that I'm the lucky chap who gets to sort it all out. Suffice to say I hate dealing with other peoples shit but now I get to do it literally (and it's only been a month or so since the dead rat). *skip further details*

Suffice to say since I'm getting tired of typing now, I hate drains, my shoes for the interview are scuffed to fuck (not happy) & I've now got to be in a shit covered basement office at 8am tomorrow morning then go from there to my interview (assuming of course I get to leave in time).

So if this is my prep, tomorrow is going to be great

 

[Testin da Cable]

gah, G, that bites :/ I feel for you mate

 

[rynnor]

Hmm - I think the worst I ever did was at a interview for Hewlett Packard - it was set for 12 hours after I got back from a 20 hour all night flight from Mexico during a El Nino heatwave in the Mexican summer whilst suffering nasty side effects from the anti-malarial drugs...

I managed to drag my half dead self to the interview and found that the first hour or so consisted of a series of those tests designed to gauge cognitive ability... I think I managed to spell my name correctly... its pretty much a blur really...

I didnt get the job

 

[Sar]

Sounds like Hannibal fucking Lecter to me:

"What makes you cry....Clarice?"

*stare intently*

 

[Jonaldo]

Could've replied "I think being stabbed repeatedly might work"

 

[Lester]

Originally posted by CAC
could have been worse though he could have written "ABSOLUTLY BOBBINS" across your aplication form


saying that the last person i interviewd i had to fill the aplication form in for them after they had written thier name and address on it,and amazingly they got the job too

I find this incredibly ironic.














But not in a cruel way.













O.k?















Btw interviews:

Funniest interview evah = Trainspotting, Spud.

 

[Lester]

Actually re-reading that and counting the missed capitals, full stops and chronic spelling I have to admit I should have been crueler (more cruel?)(crueller)(horribler)(bitterer)?

 

[Ch3tan]

All Waterstones staff are crazy. That is all.

 

[Jupitus]

Originally posted by Lester
(more cruel?)(crueller)(horribler)(bitterer)?

... and here was I thinking that your knowledge of English language was second to none

 

[MYstIC G]

Re: Re: Job Interview

Originally posted by MYstIC G
So if this is my prep, tomorrow is going to be great

Today

7:50am: Arrive in South Norwood & await arrival of CRB services who are coming to clear the drains.

8:00am: They arrive, lift drain covers, the mother of all bad smells arises. It is so bad that the guy who cleans f'kn drains for a living & spends the majority of his life in them says "I'm not going near that for 10mins, I've never smelt anything like it"

8:30am: Drains are cleared. Occupants of flats above are remanded for fucking them up in the first place (dustbin liner bags are _not_ for flushing down toilets, fs).

9:30am: Arrive in Croydon 30 mins early. "Wander about"

9:50am: Bump into Chetan's lady just as I'm about to enter the store which helps me greatly keep my mind off my nerves.

10:00am: Inverview starts, walking up to people I've never met on the shop floor and asking them about Woolworths goes smoothly. The fact I dropped the pen I was given to write with & it rolled under one of the isles where it was not retreivable, makes me look like an utter retard. "Can I have another pen please miss, I lost mine."

Get interviewed, goes ok, offered the job, even though after finishing the questionairre (I got to do the rest after the sit down part of the interview) I drop my new pen when handing it back. Thankfully this time it doesn't roll under an isle because it bounces off my interviewers foot. I put this in-ability to hold onto a pen down to me repeatedly doing this :wall: or something).

I am now essentially (as long as the induction goes well this Saturday) working in the Stockroom in Woolworths in Croydon.

 

[ECA]

Originally posted by CAC
could have been worse though he could have written "ABSOLUTLY BOBBINS" across your aplication form


saying that the last person i interviewd i had to fill the aplication form in for them after they had written thier name and address on it,and amazingly they got the job too

New title for dams tbh.

 

[Jupitus]

Originally posted by ECA
New title for dams tbh.

Seconded

And grats Mystic G!! Well done!!!