News It pays to wank

Lamp

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From 1st April 2012, men who choose to become sperm donors will be paid £35 per sperm donation. Previously men could not receive payment for donating sperm, but could be paid up to £250 to cover expenses and loss of earnings.

So, if you're short of cash, you know what to do (if not, Google it)
 

Aoami

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Interesting. I wonder if there is a limit, because i could easily knock one out every hour and double my wage.
 

Wazzerphuk

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Still pointless until they revoke the law saying kids can rock up to you and go "hi I'm yours!" 20 years later.
 

Lamp

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There are obviously limits. Otherwise no one would ever work (in the traditional sense).

10 visits a day (say)...£350 a day, 5 days a week....thats £1750 a week. Weekends off to stick the old badger in an ice bath and eat vast quantities of oranges & Vit C supplements.
 

rynnor

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Lamp said:
There are obviously limits. Otherwise no one would ever work (in the traditional sense).

10 visits a day (say)...£350 a day, 5 days a week....thats £1750 a week. Weekends off to stick the old badger in an ice bath and eat vast quantities of oranges & Vit C supplements.

Isnt it Zinc that it depletes?
 

Lamp

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No idea. I've always found 5 or 6 oranges or satsumas revitalises me back into a heavy repeater.

(I think there's zinc in oranges, not sure....perhaps one of the house resident internet worms can confirm)
 

BloodOmen

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heh, i'd never donate sperm tbh :p the thought of some random turning up 16-20 years later looking for his/her real daddy makes me weep inside abit.
 

Lamp

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Always keep a jar of nabbings by your front door. If they turn up, throw it over them "Here's your brothers & sisters too. Now feck off"
 

Edmond

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When i think of the money i have let slip through my fingers over the years.....
 

Calaen

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Isnt it Zinc that it depletes?

Zinc is the winner for sperm, taking zinc regular is great for the skin, and it also increases the amount of sperm produced and it's quality! Folic acid also increases sperm amount!
 

Edmond

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Thanks, i'm here all week....try the veal
 

Gwadien

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Still pointless until they revoke the law saying kids can rock up to you and go "hi I'm yours!" 20 years later.
Then you can say ah, yes, I remember you, Spartacus, Series 2, Episode 3 I think, man, those tits were good.
 

cHodAX

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Killer pair of tits in episode 1 of Magic City as well! :D
 

old.Tohtori

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So now i could get PAID for spreading my genes acros the world?

You hear that boys? We're getting a new deathray this week!
 

pez

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Unfortunately they will only let you donate x amount because of the tiny probability that two of your doner kids hook up.
 

Jeros

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jizz.gif
 

Scouse

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I understand what you mean - I'd just never heard the term before.
 

Moriath

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Unfortunately they will only let you donate x amount because of the tiny probability that two of your doner kids hook up.
try different collection banks hehe
rotate as you go :p
 

opticle

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Fairly sure you're not supposed to donate if you've recently spaffed within the last X hours - due to reduced sperm count etc.

Still, difficult for them to control for that and awesome :D
 

cHodAX

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Are they opening up under the name 'Splashconvertors'?
 

Wazzerphuk

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Cash4Jizz

"Simply jizz in the envelope provided, send it right to us and Wij will use his mouth to suck all the sperm out of the envelope, lather it onto a baster and shove it right up in a waiting mother."
 

BloodOmen

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Lol jizz in an envelope, reminds me of that old Lee Evans joke

"I'm sick of this bloody junk mail, I should just shit in an envelope and send it to them... you send me some of your shit I'll send you some of mine"
 

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