It hurts so much

[echome]

Earlier today I left my girlfriend after almost 3years together. Both good and bad years.

I've spend the day talking to my family and friends about it. Thinking about it myself, thinking about nothing.

Even though we both "agreed" that this was the best to do now, it still feels so wrong.
Like my heart has been ripped apart and I can't find the pieces.

Why am I then saying this stuff here? I don't really know, just thought that I wanted to write it down and hope that might help a bit.

In a way I really like that I am able to feel all those feeling that I got right now. Feel like a real humanbeing, but at the same time I just want it all to go away and feel nothing. It hurts so much and I am crying for the first time in a long time.

I still don't understand why something is suppose to feel this bad. Why can't you just shut it down and get on with your normal life.

This fucking sucks.


Hope the rest of you had a good day and remember to show your loved one how much you really love them! Don't take anything for granted. Live everyday like it is your last.

 

[Azurus]

Earlier today I left my girlfriend after almost 3years together. Both good and bad years.

I've spend the day talking to my family and friends about it. Thinking about it myself, thinking about nothing.

Even though we both "agreed" that this was the best to do now, it still feels so wrong.
Like my heart has been ripped apart and I can't find the pieces.

Why am I then saying this stuff here? I don't really know, just thought that I wanted to write it down and hope that might help a bit.

In a way I really like that I am able to feel all those feeling that I got right now. Feel like a real humanbeing, but at the same time I just want it all to go away and feel nothing. It hurts so much and I am crying for the first time in a long time.

I still don't understand why something is suppose to feel this bad. Why can't you just shut it down and get on with your normal life.

This fucking sucks.


Hope the rest of you had a good day and remember to show your loved one how much you really love them! Don't take anything for granted. Live everyday like it is your last.

Sad to hear it. At least now you can focus all your energy on the international revolution.

 

[echome]

Sad to hear it. At least now you can focus all your energy on the international revolution.

True. It gives me time to put energy into other stuff... But still feels ohh so wrong.
And why is it one listens to sad music when you are sad.. really not helping!

 

[DocWolfe]

it feels wrong because it was habit... its like giving up smoking... you know you shouldn't but you keep wanting a fag.

The only way you can get free is by going cold turkey... and then one day after weeks of urging... you realise... hey, I dont need a fag anymore. Same goes for girlfriends.

 

[CorNokZ]

I'm sorry to hear this m8.. Been through the same and it's the worst feeling in the world next to someone close to you dieing!

Hope you get better soon mate!

ps: Liqour helps nothing! Only makes you do stupid stuff

 

[Azurus]

ps: Liqour helps nothing! Only makes you do stupid stuff

How dare you talk about liqour that way!

 

[CorNokZ]

You've clearly never broken up with someone you really cared about, got hammered and done something that you still regret this day

 

[Flintlock]

I broke up with my girlie after 8 years. She wanted to settle down but that just wasn't on my adgenda. Never thought she would do it but she did. Took up with this navy guy first of all. Must have drunk myself stupid for god knows how many years. You feel half the person you were. There ain't an easy way out of it if you ask me. You just have to weather the storm. I met another woman after being apart for mmm - 15 years! The 2nd girl is nothing like the first but she is on my wavelength. The first wasn't. Now my dreams are not tormented with memories of the first girlie at all. The one I miss now is the 2nd. Broke up with her a while ago as I needed a rethink. In other words it is going to hurt and you will pine and suffer but eventually you will get over it and move on. Love ain't meant to be easy m8. Just be careful who you give your love too. Make sure they deserve it.

Damn, that was kind of cathartic (right word?). Am gonna look for more of these posts .

Regards
Bluesplayer (think I need a new name of this forum - Bluesplayer comes to mind)

 

[echome]

Thanks for it mates.

I wont try to drink it away. I have learned from my previous mistakes.
I want to feel it all and let it run its course.

I'll go have a fag and look at the sky before going to bed.
Take care all.

 

[old.Tohtori]

If you ended it, it's your f*ck up. No sympathy.
If you both decided to end it, you didn't fight hard enough. Get back there and try again, and again, and again until one of you is sick and tired of it. THEN give up. I know i should've had one time.
If she ended it, or you, for a good enough reason...well...then it's over and you probably didn't care for her that much, or her for you.

If you love her and things worked for the best most the time, then get back in there and fight for it. If things were bad most the time, then it never worked and you're more sad of the time wasted in a nonworking thing.

Getting drunk is always good, first because after a couple of drinks it's fun with friends to laugh at things(go with friends who ain't sympathetic bastards who don't know how to make you laugh and just go "Awww") and when you're hungover, your mind is in over-emotion-drive, which is a perfect time to think things through.

People diss drinking because you might do soemthing stupid,, but that's called living. Unless you rbeak the law, or call/text the ex saying she's this or that, that's just stupid.

EDIT: Yeah, i'm not one of those "aww sorry to hear", since i'm not really, but mostly 'cause someone has to say these things too.

 

[Serbitar]

my back is starting to hurt after getting my tattoo started on Saturday, 2 hours done, 4 hours to go :/ but its probably a different type of hurt

and alcohol definitely numbs the pain for me \o/

 

[Gamah]

Been with my women for a year and a half now and I would love to break up and be free again

But alas, love is a bond that's impossible to break.

 

[Bahumat]

Count yourself lucky you both "agreed"...

 

[NikonL]

I don't know exactly what went on with you guys and why you broke up. If she was treating you badly, or had done something majorly wrong then I could understand why the break up.

I was having a conversation with someone the other day, and she asked what i would do if my gf cheated on me. The only response I could give is that I'd finish with her. Because honestly.. there's no other way to handle that situation. If you forgive them, yes there's a chance that they're genuinely sorry and will never do it again. But there's also a chance that they'll think "oh i got away with it this time, maybe I can get away with it again".

Then i sat back and actually thought about breaking up with my GF, and man it would be tough. Even if she'd cheated on me every single part of me would want to forgive her and get back to being normal. And even though i'd broken up with her, i'd be devastated. so i can imagine how you feel (probably not to the extent).

On the other hand, if you've broken up with her because of something trivial.. i.e. your relationship seemed "boring" or like it wasn't going anywhere, and you feel THIS bad. then i'm willing to bet you've made a mistake. Trust me, if you break up with someone because something in your head was telling you you should, but the rest of you is going "wtf are you doing" then it's not the right decision

 

[Gamah]

I got dumped after a week once because I came down with the flu, I shugged and continued to watch the simpsons

 

[Bahumat]

I got dumped on by Vlad after a week once because I came on his face, I shuddered and continued to watch the simpsons

ooh you potty mouth! And yes, im following you!

 

[NikonL]

ooh you potty mouth! And yes, im following you!

this is the one thread i felt inclined to post on in quite a while, because all the others are filled with this pointless gay-orama. could you knock it off please? especially in a serious thread.

Feel free to try and lighten the mood and cheer ech up. but do it in a funny way :/ gayjokes are very very very boring.

 

[Bahumat]

this is the one thread i felt inclined to post on in quite a while, because all the others are filled with this pointless gay-orama. could you knock it off please? especially in a serious thread.

Feel free to try and lighten the mood and cheer ech up. but do it in a funny way :/ gayjokes are very very very boring.

Not that my opinion will make much difference to Echome, but without ME knowing why they split up, i'd either think he's a major fool, or feel sympathy for him. I hope he doesn't exlpain why they agreed to split up cause then i'll more than likely comment.

 

[echome]

I don't know exactly what went on with you guys and why you broke up. If she was treating you badly, or had done something majorly wrong then I could understand why the break up.

I was having a conversation with someone the other day, and she asked what i would do if my gf cheated on me. The only response I could give is that I'd finish with her. Because honestly.. there's no other way to handle that situation. If you forgive them, yes there's a chance that they're genuinely sorry and will never do it again. But there's also a chance that they'll think "oh i got away with it this time, maybe I can get away with it again".

Then i sat back and actually thought about breaking up with my GF, and man it would be tough. Even if she'd cheated on me every single part of me would want to forgive her and get back to being normal. And even though i'd broken up with her, i'd be devastated. so i can imagine how you feel (probably not to the extent).

On the other hand, if you've broken up with her because of something trivial.. i.e. your relationship seemed "boring" or like it wasn't going anywhere, and you feel THIS bad. then i'm willing to bet you've made a mistake. Trust me, if you break up with someone because something in your head was telling you you should, but the rest of you is going "wtf are you doing" then it's not the right decision

The problem is that we keept making each other sad and angry. We have been trying to "fix" it for a long time. And after each talk everything was good for a month or something like that. But then it would all turn back to the old.
So not like we havent tryed, many times! - 'cause we love each other but at some point you have to face the facts and move on I guess. Not like it is fun what I am feeling right now, but I do belive it is the only right thing.

I agree with who ever said that it is a habit, think it was Doc. And after almost 3years it is ofc strange not to be together and do stuff together. But perhaps later in life we will be on the same "level" and able to find the old feelings again.
The problem also is that we wanted diff. things in life right now. She wanted to be young and go clubbing everyday if thats what see wanted to - I want to travel and focus on my education.

And mr seal, you can say whatever you want - but drinking is not always a good soloution. Maybe for you but not for me.

 

[old.Tohtori]

So not like we havent tryed, many times!

And mr seal, you can say whatever you want - but drinking is not always a good soloution. Maybe for you but not for me.

Comments on these:

Good, was afraid it was another one of those "Oh it's hard lets stop" kinda things i dislike.

And.

Yes, drinking isn't always good, and not for all, but it's not as bad as some people make it sound to be. Like i said, it has upsides. Even the hangover like i said.

Drinking alone is a big nono ofcourse. Or drinking when angry. Drinkings sole purpose is to make you feel good, have fun and enjoy good company in a more "open" manner.

Oh...except drinking whiskey home while watching movies like 300 and after going to a bar all "Thish ish spartah!!!"

 

[Calaen]

Not that my opinion will make much difference to Echome, but without ME knowing why they split up, i'd either think he's a major fool, or feel sympathy for him. I hope he doesn't exlpain why they agreed to split up cause then i'll more than likely comment.

Well if you are incapable of giving your views or thoughts on the matter, why fill the thread up with bollocks it aint as if there are not enough omg I am gay, you're gay, who is gay, everyone is gay threads around.

It is hard Echome even if it is for the right reasons, what you have to decide is do you want to be without this girl in your life. If the answer is no graft your arse off and show her that it can work and you should be together. If that fails though then it really was not to be, do not beat yourself up about it though. Another love is always just around the corner.

If you want to go into the problems you were having feel free to drop me a Pm, I have had my heart ripped out on more than one occasion and I have also ended a relationship that I probably could have still been in with a girl I am am still really close to.