funny quotes!!!!

[TriggerHappy]

just heard a quote on TV a few mins ago that had me in stitches,cant remmeber the perfect wordin of it but gave me the idea to see if there are ne other good quotes around,either serious or funny just add on wat ya heard along the way

serious
"wat we do in life echos an eternity"

funny
"u'll have to speak up im wearin a towel"

 

[CorNokZ]

"Tottenham away? Love it!" - Tommy from the Football Factory:england:

 

[tris-]

"it happens" - forest gump
HE DOESNT SAY SHIT HAPPENS OK? HE SAYS IT HAPPENS.

ahem

 

[Forfid]

on an interview after his last game for F.C. Porto, the defender João Pinto states to the journalist:

"... My heart has only one color... blue and white..."

on another game:

"... the team was in front of the cliff but we steped forward and won..."

and another one:

"... He was a player with capital M..."

and there are alot more pearls from him but they are lost in the translation

 

[Straef]

That's like a quote with a capital G :d Nice one

 

[Soha]

Swedish one ala Arne Hägerfors
"Det ser mörkt ut på Kameruns avbytarbänk...."
or this one
"De hade fem, men de ville ha sex, och de fick de när Foppa tryckte in den! .."
someone translate pls =)

 

[Vladamir]

Not so much a funny quote but makes you think;

"What would happen if an unstoppable force were to meet an immoveable object?"

































My guess is Chuck Norris is formed!

 

[Straef]

Not so much a funny quote but makes you think;

"What would happen if an unstoppable force were to meet an immoveable object?"

Wouldn't that be the exact oposite of what'd happen when Vladamir would try to use his brains?






... Maybe not.

 

[TriggerHappy]

Not so much a funny quote but makes you think;

"What would happen if an unstoppable force were to meet an immoveable object?"

































My guess is Chuck Norris is formed!

wen david hasselhoff punched himself in the chin

 

[Lightfighter]

"There we stood on the battlefield, outnumbered 50 to 2, AND WE GOT THEM BOTH!"

 

[Demon2k3]

QUOTE]"De hade fem, men de ville ha sex, och de fick de när Foppa tryckte in den! .."
someone translate pls =)[/QUOTE]

translation, altho it's not as comical in sweden as in english.
"they had five, but they wanted six, and they got it when foppa pushed it in.
another comical translation
"they had five, but they wanted sex, and they got it when foppa pushed it in.

 

[Anarawan]

"There we stood on the battlefield, outnumbered 50 to 2, AND WE GOT THEM BOTH!"

That statement is surelly from albion

P.S. Reped your sig

 

[Ging]

wen david hasselhoff punched himself in the chin

true the hoff > norris!

 

[Speedr]

"There we stood on the battlefield, outnumbered 50 to 2, AND WE GOT THEM BOTH!"

Taken from a certain online comic strip

Doesn't discount the fact it's a good one

 

[Samaroon|Terracotta]

Taken from a certain online comic strip

Doesn't discount the fact it's a good one

Camelot addict ftw

 

[Jeffery]

these nto really funni just wierd

" 3 lefts make a right " .. i.e if u turn left 90 degree's 3 times u will make a right turn from the way ur goin !! ...

and

" a clock that is wrong is right 2 times a day " ( even if clock has no battry !! )

 

[Aberrathien]

Dan quayle once said `"I wish i had more latin in school, so i can talk better with ppl for latinamerica" or " For NASA, space is still a high priority"

Stupid git!

 

[Soha]

the old and classic
640kb is enough memory for everyone - Bill Gates

I see an demand of 5-6 computer in the world - Forgot the name but former from IBM

 

[Blow]

Quotes from Johan Cruijff are always funny.

"If we have the ball they cant score"

"You have to make sure to score one goal more then the other team"

Below a link with most of his funny quotes, all in dutch tho.

http://www.lachmee.nl/Teksten/tekst Cruijff uitspraken.htm

 

[Darzil]

" a clock that is wrong is right 2 times a day " ( even if clock has no battry !! )

Think this one should be "A stopped clock is right 2 times a day".

After all, one that's 5 minutes slow is wrong all the time.

Darzil

 

[Sharaft]

this is something a teacher on school actually said once and she had to correct herself

"Turn on the lights please, i cant hear anything" haha i laughed my ass high!

 

[Sharaft]

My guess is Chuck Norris is formed!

HAHAHAHAHA! i read that once on the net! they flame him sooooo much!

i like thisone

"People dont kill people, Chuck Norris kill people" - Unknown

 

[Erulin]

"My Fellow Astronauts" - Dan Quayle speaking to NASSA

"Dying in a fantasy roleplaying game isn't neccesarily a bad carreer move"

"You found a girlfriend ? Just goes to show even blind monkeys can find a bannanna from time to time" - Muylaetrix

"Who could have possibly envisioned an erection - an election in Iraq at this point in history" - Dubya Bush at the White House, Jan.10.2005

And some more serious ones that I like

"Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever." - Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

"Don't be so humble - you are not that great." - Golda Meir (1898-1978)

"People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid." - Kierkegaard (1813-1855)

"Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted." - Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." - Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use." - Galileo Galilei

"In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." - Martin Luther King Jr. (1929-1968)

"The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it." - Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

 

[Sharaft]

two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." - Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

did you know this, albert einstein had a very high IQ but when he was working down plans he only used 128 (they assumed) as he was strong dyslecticer? man was very smart but his plans and notes looked like he was like a normal person

 

[Ging]

did you know this, albert einstein had a very high IQ but when he was working down plans he only used 128 (they assumed) as he was strong dyslecticer? man was very smart but his plans and notes looked like he was like a normal person

this may be the post of the year for me :worthy:

 

[Sorao]

i fav quote is from Mr Bush

when some swimmer set a new record at same meating he was at and made a speach went somthing like this



A congratulate <name> cant remmber . on swiming the Fastest Time ever Swam on American soil.

now i jsut find this funny

 

[j00ster]

 

[Erulin]

"The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins." - Oliver Wendell Holmes (1841-1935)

So true, So true


PS : Einstein flunked math EVERY year he was in school. He was a genius at physics but as usual with geniusses he sucked bubbles at other things.

 

[Ging]

PS : Einstein flunked math EVERY year he was in school. He was a genius at physics but as usual with geniusses he sucked bubbles at other things.

i suck @ DAOC coz im a genius at kebab eating...

 

[xGenocidex]

"If it wasn't for pickpockets i'd have no sex life at all"

"If i were gay you'd all have sore arses" - DjSatansfury