England...

[mank!]

none of us are paid extortionate amounts to do better, meg.

 

[Jupitus]

First thing I would do as Englan Manager is get the whole pool of viable first team players into an x-factor-esque audition queue and audition room with 2 exits. One by one I would ask them to sing the national anthem... yes, with all the words... those who could get door A, those who can't get door B.

I'd then start working on the A exiters.

Bunch of spangles

 

[Opt1]

English footballers are a joke. They earn far too much money and these days have very little to show for it.

Based on earnings, they should be the best and most disciplined team in the world..

 

[Tom]

Footballers don't earn too much money. They earn what market forces demand. If people don't like it, then they should stop buying shirts, paying for tickets, and watching Sky Sports.

Anyway:

Tributes are being paid to Scotland this morning after the entire country laughed itself to death.
The alarm was first raised at around 10pm last night as thousands of phone calls and text messages went unanswered.

Small groups of volunteers from Berwick-Upon-Tweed and Carlisle ventured north just after midnight only to find houses full of dead people gathered around still blaring television sets.
By dawn, as RAF helicopters flew over deserted city streets, it was clear that the whole country had suffered a catastrophic abdominal rupture.

Wayne Hayes, a special constable from Northumberland, said: "We went into one house in Dunbarand found three men sitting on the sofa with huge smiles on their faces, still holding cans of 70 shilling. They seemed to be at peace."
He added: "In a house near Edinburgh we found a man face down on the living room floor with his trousers and pants round his knees.
"It seems he may have been showing his bare buttocks to the television when he keeled over."
Roy Hobbs, a civil engineer from Northampton, said: "I got a call from my friend Ian in Stirling at about 9.50pm.
"He was already laughing when I answered the phone, but after about 25 minutes of the most vigorous and uncontrollable hilarity, everything suddenly went very quiet."

Moving tributes are already being placed along the Scotland-England border with many mourners opting to leave a simple bag of chips or a deep fried bunch of flowers.

 

[throdgrain]

Step 1 play 4-4-2
step 2 play winston churchill speeches in the dressing room
step 3 collect loot.

LMAO quite right mate

 

[Embattle]

Footballers don't earn too much money. They earn what market forces demand. If people don't like it, then they should stop buying shirts, paying for tickets, and watching Sky Sports.

IMO that isn't the case with footballers, at least not in the last decade where clubs haven't made much money and it tends to be down to agent demands more than market demands.

 

[Guest]

has it come to the state where we cant find an english manager for our national side, surely the likes of mr barwick need to get sacked as well ,the FA are a robbing bunch of cun ts anyway, who is brian barwicks boss?, start again, get an english manager in who isnt afraid of walling some ponce millionaire football "star" up or kicking a football boot at their heads alex ferguson style.

We need someone with a hard man attitude that speaks his mind and tells the press to fuck off and leave him alone, someone who isnt bothered about the politics and just wants to coach football......

that man is..................

sam allardyce


but no, we will get some foreign fucklord who isnt in it for England, just for selfish personal gain..

 

[Embattle]

I think there is also the problem of who the fuck would want to be England manager, unless you are paid so much you wouldn't have to worry about your career after you get fired.

 

[Frizz]

BBC SPORT | Football | Internationals | England managerial contenders

As much as it'd be nice to have Mourinho, I'm almost certain he'll never manage England. Martin O'Neill is old hat, and Harry Redknapp is a dealer, not a manager (). Sam Allardyce isn't interested anymore and Alan Curbishley seems out of it nowadays.

I'd like to see either Steve Coppell (who's experience in the major tournaments is lacking, but I think he's got what it takes), Lippi or Capello.

 

[Tom]

sam allardyce

rofl. Sam "BOOT IT UP THE FIELD!!!!" Allardyce?

No thanks.

 

[Bodhi]

Tributes are being paid to Scotland this morning after the entire country laughed itself to death.
The alarm was first raised at around 10pm last night as thousands of phone calls and text messages went unanswered.

Small groups of volunteers from Berwick-Upon-Tweed and Carlisle ventured north just after midnight only to find houses full of dead people gathered around still blaring television sets.
By dawn, as RAF helicopters flew over deserted city streets, it was clear that the whole country had suffered a catastrophic abdominal rupture.

Wayne Hayes, a special constable from Northumberland, said: "We went into one house in Dunbarand found three men sitting on the sofa with huge smiles on their faces, still holding cans of 70 shilling. They seemed to be at peace."
He added: "In a house near Edinburgh we found a man face down on the living room floor with his trousers and pants round his knees.
"It seems he may have been showing his bare buttocks to the television when he keeled over."
Roy Hobbs, a civil engineer from Northampton, said: "I got a call from my friend Ian in Stirling at about 9.50pm.
"He was already laughing when I answered the phone, but after about 25 minutes of the most vigorous and uncontrollable hilarity, everything suddenly went very quiet."

Moving tributes are already being placed along the Scotland-England border with many mourners opting to leave a simple bag of chips or a deep fried bunch of flowers.

hehehehehehehe

On Saturday night, I was given quite a lot of abuse by my so called friends because England were going to be at Euro 2008 and Scotland weren't. I went out last night with tthe afore mentioned friends last night to watch the greatest team in the history of the world ever ever EVER "hump" Croatia and cement their place in the Finals.

Oh how I laughed. There was much smugness last night let me tell you.

 

[Opt1]

Footballers don't earn too much money. They earn what market forces demand. If people don't like it, then they should stop buying shirts, paying for tickets, and watching Sky Sports.

Footballers earn too much money.

I couldn't give a toss about market forces.

The fact that they earn so much money is pretty damn sad in the face of all the people out there with sweet fa.

They don't have to be paid that much, they could live ridiculously comfy lifestyles with far less.

Yup, I'm an idealist but personally I don't see why excessive amounts of money like that, generated by market forces, can't be sent to worthwhile causes instead of piling it all in one place..

Oh wait, there's human nature. :touch:

 

[DaGaffer]

hehehehehehehe

On Saturday night, I was given quite a lot of abuse by my so called friends because England were going to be at Euro 2008 and Scotland weren't. I went out last night with tthe afore mentioned friends last night to watch the greatest team in the history of the world ever ever EVER "hump" Croatia and cement their place in the Finals.

Oh how I laughed. There was much smugness last night let me tell you.

Your "friends" are fucking idiots. Any England fan with an IQ higher than their number of fingers was expecting the worst, and we got it. Frankly, the Israel win on Saturday just prolonged the agony.

My personal view is that, yes, the England players lacked "passion" or "grit" or whatever you want to call it, but McLaren is still the major culprit. Fact is, there's something in the English game, and in the English psyche, that makes poor managers. There isn't a genuinely world-class English football manager. Not one. I actually think part of the problem is that intelligence is frowned upon amongst English players, and that a lot of English players who graduate to management don't understand that sometimes it's not about being matey with the players, but putting a rocket under them, and that they really don't don't get much opportunity to develop management skills other than "on the job" (there's more of a progression structure overseas which is starting to catch on here, but unfortunately with foreign coaches). Roy Keane would make an awesome England manager because he wouldn't give a fuck, and would probably batter them when they got stroppy.

 

[Tom]

So Opt1, what are you on, compared to someone living in, lets say, Bangladesh?

You're talking bollocks.

 

[Ch3tan]

DaGaffer is right, not one English manager is actually classy enough to take the job. Allardyce, O'Niell, Curbishley, Redknapp. They are good managers, but they are not going to get anywhere with England.

If we want an English man in charge then give Shearer the job (assuming he has finished his coaching badges).

edit;// apparently capello has declared his interest in the job. would be a good move imo.

 

[Trem]

As far as results go wasn't Sven our most succesful manager?

Give it to a Johnny foreigner imho, would love Jose to get it.

Also about last night, why the fuck did he take Sean Wright-Phillips off? He was our second best player.

Mclaren is an absolute tit and I am so glad hes gone.

 

[Ch3tan]

I don't think that Venebles, Hoddle or Sven did a particularly bad job. Sven just gave up at the end. Mcclaren came nowhere near to any of them.

 

[Kryten]

Tbh, they're mostly shit. It's not like England have a huge host of talent to pick from - most of our best players are about as english as Adolf Hitler's pet emu.

Frankly, give the job to Mike Bassett.

 

[Calaen]

Venables was alright, to many draws though. Sven was shit tactically as well though. He never had a plan B Mclarens problem was he knew that because of his work so he made a plan c, d, e, f, g but no-one knew how to fucking play how he wanted.

 

[Aada]

Thing is though does anyone actually care now it's over?


Even if we did make it through we would have lost out on penalties anyway lol


It's a shame Becks aint won anything yet i still think he is a class player.

Oh yeah and the media are just loving all the DOOM and GLOOM anyone see the front page of The Sun?

You could just tell they wanted England to lose, sells more papers i guess.

 

[Ch3tan]

Yeah I agree about Beckham Aada, he is always there for England. It's just a shame he has been through so many low points -not his fault managers play him when he is not fit.

 

[Opt1]

So Opt1, what are you on, compared to someone living in, lets say, Bangladesh?

You're talking bollocks.

I'm a student and I work damn hard..

And I can guarantee if I start earning £1million+, I'm giving a lot away..

At what point did I say I was on a similar salary to football players? :touch:

But yes, we all have a lot more than those in Bangladesh, that's a moot point. Football players however have a-f***ing-unnecessarily-lot more.

..And I don't understand why more can't be given to folk with nothing when some people have excessive amounts.

And how is any of that bollocks?

Like I said, idealist - doesn't mean I expect any of it to ever happen.

 

[Clown]

I wouldn't give any away. Fuck that shit.

 

[Opt1]

:kissit:

 

[Wonk]

I like how people say that Capello would be a good manager for England.

You'll get some decent resoults, but the football won't be attractive at all. Then we'll get to hear how shit the manager is once again, because he cant get the most out of his material

 

[Bodhi]

I like how people say that Capello would be a good manager for England.

You'll get some decent resoults, but the football won't be attractive at all. Then we'll get to hear how shit the manager is once again, because he cant get the most out of his material

I thought this. He's one of the best managers in the world, but he's never exactly been known for his flowing attacking football. He's also a bit suspect in cup competitions, I personally remember his attempts to win the CL with Juventus. I've never seen such a lacklustre display in all my life. Can't argue with his league results though (won the league with every club he's been at) and he'd dfinitely be a class above that ginger bastard you got in last time. I mean we were flattered that you copied us in installing a ginger manager, but c'mon, half our conutry's ginger, we had a far greater chance of finding a good 'un.

And no, you're not having McLeish. I'm not sure he'd want to take the step down to managing England anyway

 

[rynnor]

The last one was crap but no Manager will ever match the fans un-realistic expectations.

The media completely over-hype the current english talent which leads to massive expectations that can never really be met.

Additionally managing England is totally different from Managing a team IN England.

Jose was ok at Chelsea but how would he or any other manager take to a job where you have almost no power over a bunch of prima-donnas who are constantly told by the media that they are a golden generation and where the fees for england are barely worth turning up for compared to their club money.

The England Manager is also at the mercy of the Premier league Managers who can decide who he can field by setting players as 'unfit' and thus not available.

Plus many fans who attend England games are morons - booing the opposing National Anthem / booing Lampard - screw em - its probably bad karma thats doing it

 

[mank!]

the way real madrid played under capello last season made me physically sick.

 

[Trem]

We are also fucked for the 2010 world cup as well as it looks like we won't be a seeded team. Going to be in deep deep shit if we are in the same group as say Italy and Germany or maybe Portugal and France or even Spain and Czech Republic................

I say get used to us not reaching any major tournaments for a fair few years to come, even if they make Jesus manager we are fucked.

 

[rynnor]

even if they make Jesus manager we are fucked.

Fantastic idea!!! - after all we tried brits and they were crap so lets try another foreigner!

A guy who can come back from the dead sounds perfect for England manager