Bored, lets quote

[old.Odysseus]

3. time that is posted :/
strike three! ure out

 

[Alysindra]

Lady Astor to Churchill: "Winston, if you were my husband I would flavour your coffee with poison"
Churchill: "Madam, if I were your husband, I should drink it"

We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world -- Dan Quayle

I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people -- Dan Quayle

Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning? -- George W Bush

It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it -- George W Bush

"Americans have different ways of saying things. They say "elevator", we say "lift" ... they say "President", we say "stupid psychopathic git." -- Alexai Sayle

"Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I assure you, it's much more serious than that." -- Bill Shankly.

"Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps." -- Emo Philips.

I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members -- Croucho Marx

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. -- H. Bogart

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. -- Henny Youngman

Boy, those French: They have a different word for everything!
-- Steve Martin

 

[Belsameth]

Originally posted by Cowled


That isn't correct.

That is from a Movie, with a guy with his chainsaw and shotgun, being ported to an undead-world.

Can't remember name.

Evil dead. Duke was strongly influenced by him..
well, strongly. only 99% orso

Edit: while we're having Duke quotes

I ain't got time to play with myself

 

[bracken_woodman]

"There are Middys on the wall... they think it's all over... it is now!"

Kenneth MacWalstonholme <Keepers of Wembley '66>

(possibly...)

 

[Arthwyr]

Damnit Jim, thats a phaser not a flashlight

He's dead Jim

Dr McKoy - aka Bones - Star Trek

Aye captain, she's givin' you all she's got but she cant take it much longer

Scotty -Star Trek

Spock ... Analysis

Captain James T. Kirk - Star trek

It's a lifeform captain but not as we know it

Fascinating !

Mr Spock - Star trek

Love this one too, from Young guns
-judge: "William H Bonney, also know as billy the Kidd, I sentence you to be hung till you are Dead ! Dead ! Dead ! Do you have any last words ?"
-W.H.Bonney: "Yea, You can go to Hell, Hell Hell"

Top gun

Damnit son your ego is writing cheques your body can't cash

 

[eös]

Originally posted by Cowled


That isn't correct.

That is from a Movie, with a guy with his chainsaw and shotgun, being ported to an undead-world.

Can't remember name.

Army of Darkness

 

[Killgorde]

Tarantino at his most sadistic as a director:

Marvin: I already told you I don't know anything about any fucking setup; you can torture me all you want.
Mr. Blonde: Torture you? That's a good idea. I like that.

Mr. Blonde: I don't give a good fuck what you know or don't know, I'm going to torture you anyway.

[Mr. Blonde has cut off Marvin's ear and begins talking into it.]
Mr. Blonde: Hey, Can you hear that?

And humorous (plays Mr Pink):

Joe: And you are Mr. Pink.
Mr. Pink: Why am I Mr. Pink?
Joe: Cause you're a faggot, ok
Mr. Pink: How about I be Mr.Purple?
Joe: No, You can't be Mr. Purple.
Mr. Pink: Why not?
Joe: Someone on another job is Mr. Purple
Mr. White: Who cares what your name is?
Mr. Pink: Oh yeah that's easy for you to say you've got a cool sounding name. How about we trade, OK? You're Mr. Pink

[Mr. Pink comes and sees that Mr. Orange is shot in the stomach]
Mr. Pink: Is it bad?
Mr. White: As opposed to good?

 

[Loccon]

CLATAU VERATO NIc<couch>chh<couch>grou
- What!? I spoke the words!!

Ash in Army of Darkness

 

[SingerOfSoul]

another dukester

"Suck My Boomstick"

the great Duke of Nukem

 

[old.The McScrooges]

Originally posted by old.Zorewin

The mighty duke

<ahem> This quote is actually from a film, before The Duke came on the scene. In which a guy had to fight Aliens looking like humans and for the life of me I can't remember its name. So looks like the Duke is some lame toilet drinking quoter without an original bone in his body, maybe....

"I am a mean mother <pause> servant of God."

Course I could quote the sales pitch for the Titty Twister but I'd just blush.

 

[old.The McScrooges]

Damn I forgot my favourite quote.

Lucifer - "I could lay you out and fill your mouth with your mother's feces. Or, we could talk."

Prophecy.

 

[Tranquil-]

Look in sig.

 

[eös]

Originally posted by old.The McScrooges


<ahem> This quote is actually from a film, before The Duke came on the scene. In which a guy had to fight Aliens looking like humans and for the life of me I can't remember its name.

They Live

 

[old.The McScrooges]

Originally posted by eös

They Live

Yeah, now have to go see if I can get a copy to go with my all seeing shades.

 

[bishibosh]

i see dead people...
cos no one can be fked to res

 

[old.davidlqs]

Brian: "You are all individuals!"

Crowd beneath window in unison: "Yes! We are all individuals!"

-Life of Brian


"But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks?
It is the east, and Juliet is the sun."

"O happy dagger!
This is thy sheath; there rest, and let me die."

-Both ends of the happiness spectrum in one play - genius.

 

[bishibosh]

You couldnt shoot an elephant at this dist<bang>

 

[old.anubis]

- anything to declare?
- yea, dont go to england

snatch

 

[bishibosh]

"im sorry we must run a background check to check we can trust you with this gun"
"3 days? but i want it noow, id kill you if i had my gun"

 

[eös]

Paquita: "your mother ate my dog!"
Lionel: "not all of it...
-Braindead

 

[talen_sun]

"You're telling me she left you cause you farted?"

"She was going down on me at time. WHAT! I was relaxed!"

Mallrats

 

[Killgorde]

Positively my last contributions (I swear ) from This is Spinal Tap, my all time funniest movie:

[Nigel is playing a soft piece on the piano]
Marty DiBergi: It's very pretty.
Nigel Tufnel: You know, just simple lines intertwining, you know, very much like - I'm really influenced by Mozart and Bach, and it's sort of in between those, really. It's like a Mach piece, really. It's sort of -
Marty DiBergi: What do you call this?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, this piece is called "Lick My Love Pump."

[Reading a review of Spinal Tap's latest album]
Marty DiBergi: "This pretentious ponderous collection of religious rock psalms is enough to prompt the question, `What day did the Lord create Spinal Tap, and couldn't he have rested on that day too?'"

Nigel Tufnel: The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven and -
Marty DiBergi: Oh, I see. And most amps go up to ten?
Nigel Tufnel: Exactly.
Marty DiBergi: Does that mean it's louder? Is it any louder?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?
Marty DiBergi: I don't know.
Nigel Tufnel: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?
Marty DiBergi: Put it up to eleven.
Nigel Tufnel: Eleven. Exactly. One louder.
Marty DiBergi: Why don't you just make ten louder and make ten be the top number and make that a little louder?
Nigel Tufnel: [Pause] These go to eleven

[Nigel Tufnel is showing Marty DiBergi one of his favorite guitars]
Nigel Tufnel: The sustain, listen to it.
Marty DiBergi: I don't hear anything.
Nigel Tufnel: Well you would though, if it were playing.

Derek Smalls: It's like fire and ice, basically. I feel my role in the band is to be somewhere in the middle of that, kind of like lukewarm water.

Marty DiBergi: "This tasteless cover is a good indication of the lack of musical invention within. The musical growth of this band cannot even be charted. They are treading water in a sea of retarded sexuality and bad poetry."
Nigel Tufnel: That's just nitpicking, isn't it?

MARTIN DiBERGI: "So what happened to that drummer?"
MICK SHRIMPTON: "Well, it's also not a very pleasant story but... well, he died."
DEREK SMALLS: "Yeah: the official explanation is that he choked... on vomit."
MICK: "In fact, it was someone else's vomit, but they don't know exactly whose vomit it was. They, they don't have the technology at Scotland Yard to... you know, find out for sure or anything."
NIGEL TUFNEL: "You can't... dust for vomit."

/salutes Ody for putting up a great thread

 

[Jiggs]

'omina mutantur nos et mutamur in illis'

all things change and we must change with them


'mortui non mordent'

dead men tell no tales


'de nihilio nihil'

nothing come from nothing


'audaces fortuna juvat'

fortune favours the bold


and my favourite:

'quis custodiet ipsos custodes'

Juvenal in his satires: 'who will guard the guards themselves'
adapted by alan moore in 'the watchmen' as 'who watches the watchmen'

 

[slapmesilly..]

I'm the good AND the bad... you're just ugly!

-Duke Nukem, once again

 

[old.Tijl]

From "The Dark Tower" series by Stephen King:

- "I was just thinking about how stupid some people can be - you put them in a room with six doors, they'll still walk into the walls. And then have the nerve to bitch about it."

- "Friends and lovers lie endlessly, caught in the web of duty."

- "Fools are the only folk on the earth who can absolutely count on getting what they deserve."

- "Would you kill all your answers so easily gunslinger?" Come down, the gunslinger said. Answers all around.

- "I do not aim with my hand; he who aims with his hand has forgotten the face of his father. I aim with my eye."
"I do not shoot with my hand; he who shoots with his hand has forgotten the face of his father. I shoot with my mind."
"I do not kill with my gun; he who kills with his gun has forgotten the face of his father. I kill with my heart."

 

[old.Odysseus]

OK!
Lots of good quotes, now is where i get tuff and get some real heavy stuff out!

I have carried out my design... I have destroyed the Austrian army.
-Napoleon after the battle at Austerlitz 1805

Let us finish this war with a thunderbolt!
-Marshal Soult at Austerlitz

When they draw close to their adversaries... they charge with gret force as lions which, spurred by hunger, thirst for blood. Then they shout and grind their teeth and fill the air with their cries. And they spare no one.
-Turkish commander Kilij Arslan on the crusaders at Antioch

[...]and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.
-A. Lincoln, the Gettysburg Adress nov. 19, 1863

 

[Hulbur]

I have a cunning plan mylord!

~ Baldric , Black Adder

 

[Cloak_]

Does it hurt? ,, Does it hurt?

Robocop

What? your a college kid

Robo agen

 

[thefunkrocket]

To lose 1 parent, Mr Worthing, may be regarded as a misfortune: to lose both looks like carlessness.

Oscar Wilde

 

[bishibosh]

"buff me up scotty"

eeny