Best Simpsons quotes

[Ezteq]

aww its all come flooding back to me right:

where homer argues with his brain when having to do an exam

Homer: ok brain you dont like me and i dont like you so lets just get this over with and i'll continue killing you with beer.

cant recall full ep but homer does something and someone asks him what he's up to

Homer: i've landed a small part in a broadway play
Brain: Oh Bravo clap........................... clap ..................................... clap...................................

homers brain thinks something that homer doesnt want it to
Homer: shut up you or i'll stab you with a q tip.

and a classic song
simpson, homer simpson, he's the greatest guy in history, from The Town Of Springfield.... he's about to his a chestnut treeee AAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrgh!!!

 

[Garnet]

and a classic song
simpson, homer simpson, he's the greatest guy in history, from The Town Of Springfield.... he's about to hit a chestnut treeee AAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrgh!!!

LOL you bet me to it, was about to post that! Noooooooooooooooooo!

 

[Lamp]

Bart: Man that's so bad it sucks and blows !

 

[Keitan]

My favourite is:


Homer: you see you gotta sass it.
Homer: a turkey is a bad person

 

[Hawkwind]

Fav one I can remember is:

Homer: There's your giraffe, little girl.
Ralph: I'm a boy.
Homer: That's the spirit. Never give up.

Found this one whilst looking the one above up (avoidance of the flame).

Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal.
Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.

:worthy:

 

[ilaya]

homer:

IM LIVING IN A CUCKOO CLOCK!

and ofc..

simpson, homer simpson, he's the greatest guy in history, from the town of springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree ARGGGH!

 

[Job]

Homer has both arms stuckup 2 drinks machines.

The engineers discuss amputation, then one says to Homer.

'Excuse me Sir you're not just still holding on to the drinks you were trying to steal are you?'

Homer: Your POINT being?

 

[Ctuchik]

Homer: I am so smart, I am so smart, S.M.R.T, i mean S.M,A,R,T!

 

[Ctuchik]

cant recall full ep but homer does something and someone asks him what he's up to

Homer: i've landed a small part in a broadway play
Brain: Oh Bravo clap........................... clap ..................................... clap...................................

thats lisa asking Homer why he's singing

Lisa- "Dad, why are you singing?" Homer'sHead- "Tell A Lie Tell A Lie" Homer- "Because I got a small role in a broadway musical. Not much, but it's a start" Homer'sHead- "Bra-vo... *clap* *clap* *Clap*"




i have the soundfile if u want it

 

[Arakasi01]

Marge: This is the worst thing you have ever done.

Homer: You say that so much it has lost all meaning.

 

[Mybuddies]

It may not be the funniest, but it is the one I use most often:

Mayor Quimby, releasing thousands of rats into the city after busting the Mob's illegal rat-milking racket shouts after them:-

'Run free, little vermin; the city is yours!'.

I say this to my kids when I let them out of their pushchair in the shopping mall. (This is true irl).

 

[Job]

I love Lisas's dry remark when Bart gets an earing.

'Ooh how individual in a conformist sort of way'

Just like Tatoos and body piercing, I want to be different just like everybody else.

 

[Wiazabi]

"I don't have to be careful, I got a gun."

 

[Lamp]

Well, he's kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidentally" with "repeatedly," and replace "dog" with "son."

 

[r0xx]

soz to drag this up but

eposide where he is having fun with lisa <museam etc>

hes stuck on cheery picker floating thru water

"Lord im not normally a praying man ... but if your up there please help me

superman! xD

 

[Zierena]

[after Milhouse moves out of town, Skinner and Willie are shocked to learn that Bart and Lisa have become best friends]

Groundskeeper Willie: It won't last. Brothers and sisters are natural enemies. Like Englishmen and Scots! Or Welshmen and Scots! Or Japanese and Scots! Or Scots and other Scots! Damn Scots! They ruined Scotland!

Principal Skinner: You Scots sure are a contentious people.
Groundskeeper Willie: You just made an enemy for life!

:worthy:

 

[Cirandi]

My all-time favourite is:

Groundkeeper Willie's friend (to Willie): "I'll kick yer groin intae puddin!"

Willie: "Ye talk like a poet, and ye fight like one too!"

 

[Gustav]

when the school hits hard times and must find replacements...

Even groundskeeper willie is teaching french

GW: Bonjourrrrrrrrr...you cheese eating surrender monkeys.

 

[civy]

Comic Book Guy: But, Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills. You're from two different worlds... Oh, I've wasted my life.

 

[Tsabo]

I loved the Shinning.

Willie: Beware of the Shinning!

Bart: Isn't it the Shining?

Willie: SHHHH! Do yer wanna get us sued!?

AND...

Homer: All work and no Beer make Homer something something...

Marge: Go Crazy?

Homer: DON'T MIND IF I DO! <Homer goes nuts> BLAH BLAH BLAH... VUUD VUUD VUUD VUUD...

 

[Commandment]

[after Milhouse moves out of town, Skinner and Willie are shocked to learn that Bart and Lisa have become best friends]

Groundskeeper Willie: It won't last. Brothers and sisters are natural enemies. Like Englishmen and Scots! Or Welshmen and Scots! Or Japanese and Scots! Or Scots and other Scots! Damn Scots! They ruined Scotland!

Principal Skinner: You Scots sure are a contentious people.
Groundskeeper Willie: You just made an enemy for life!

:worthy:

that is fucking hilarous tbh