Help any final tips?

[kiliarien]

Jesus, just be yourself and make friends through work.

I'd avoid Uni tbh - you've moved on to a different phase in your life it seems. Nowt wrong with Uni (loved it personally) but it is a different outlook.

But don't ask us FH'rs - as you seem to have come to the correct conclusion, it's crazy advice for the most part! :lol:

 

[Calaen]

Joining the karate club was a good move, don't go out to a club on your own unless your a twat or you're from finland

See what goes on at work, there might be sports events organised, or specific social nights out. If there isn't start organising them, get a bowling night on the cards and let people know it's a bring a friend along night. Atleast then your gonna be in a semi controlled environment, with work friends to fall back on if the randoms are freaks

 

[old.Tohtori]

Wow, so one guy from Finland and one from Sweden are telling English people how the social scene in English bars works. Astounding. Really, please do go and explain every facet of life in England, we obviously didn't realise all this time.

Well first, TdC agreed with it too.

Guess you forum lot are the anti-social scene of England then?

IT doesn't matter which part of the world it is, you can make new friends in clubs etc the same way.

It tells more about YOU then us that you think there would be a beating if you talked to someone

 

[Lamp]

I know loads of people who will go to a club on their own in London. But we're not talking about the short of shite night-clubs in city centres in some ghastly northern or Midlands city catering for the 15-20 year old crowd...clubs for older people late 20's / 30s - of which there are loads in London, where there's rarely a mass fight on the dance floor, people don't puke up like kechup bottles in a fast food rack, which doesn't play trance shite, and where you can actually hear people talk rather than getting your ears blasted by Peter Andre at 1am

 

[Ch3tan]

When did I say there would be a beating? It's just not done like that, I've travelled to a lot of other countries, and brits on holiday are more social, as are the natives of most other countries. Brits at home are very protective of their own space, they don't mingle with strangers that easily, people do not tend to go out on their own.

 

[Lamp]

brits on holiday are more social

lol

Euphemism for going round pissed out your head 24 hours of the day permanently looking for a fuck or a fight and where you can act like total dickheads because there's no fear of bumping into anyone you know

 

[Ch3tan]

I said holiday, not a binge drink shagging getaway There is a difference.

I went to Marmaris last month and saw no fights, I see more drunken trouble in London than I have on my last 3 holidays.

 

[old.Tohtori]

When even brits can't decide how you are, i think it's funny as hell that Ch3t decided to try and flame me

 

[TdC]

Well first, TdC agreed with it too.

not really. I said:

um, surely you could ask a person sitting by themselves, or ask a group of people about the town they're living in?

I also said:

I am aware that I could potentially sit in a UK pub all day long without anyone coming near me

this is because the behaviour, manners, etc, of people just differs from place to place. I'm not an authority, nor do I actually live in the UK. I currently live in NL and imo it's quite normal here. On the other hand, pub culture is extremely ingrained into UK society, and there are good odds that tris-'s future work and sports people have days where they hit the town en masse to chill out a bit giving him loads of opportunities .

 

[Ch3tan]

Toht, you have a wierd definition of flaming. I'm simply trying to point out how absurd it is to try and argue a point on culture with people from the culture.

 

[old.Tohtori]

Toht, you have a wierd definition of flaming. I'm simply trying to point out how absurd it is to try and argue a point on culture with people from the culture.

And i pointed out that if you can't agree on it yourself, maybe there's a grain of truth in it being a social aspect, not a national

 

[tris-]

Where are you moving to tris?

I graduated in 2007 and still play hockey for uni at weekends and train twice on week days. My social life is plenty full enough with that and the assorted socials. Good fun, good mates. Way forward imo!

im moving 200 miles to ipswich so i cant continue daily with my current links. its a total bitch. im going from training 6 days a week for the last year, to not doing it.

 

[soze]

If i was sat there at a table with a group of friends and a random asked to sot down i would not think hey potential new friend. If you are not discussing Sport or TV how could the random possibly join the conversation. If you are talking about your mate Bob coping off with that girl from the Chip Shop the random would stand no chance. I would say you are more likely to meet people at the bar \ smoking area where groups are broken up a little.

That being said if i was discussing football and a random chirped in with a opinion i would have no problem with him sitting down and joining in. So its situational for me.

Tris im not sure of your views on football but going to a bar with the game on would be a great way to watch football just have your story straight for who you support up north and act interested in all things Tractor Boy.

 

[Ch3tan]

Just don't mention the Ipswich v Newcastle match the other week. We all you know you are a Geordie fucker, no need to rub it into their faces.

 

[Ezteq]

Good luck with the move matey; join the library when you get there!

 

[Garaen]

Chet is correct, sitting on a stranger's table is not the way it's done in the UK - it's the antithesis of some (mostly european) cultures and is seen as being rude and ignorant.

Best way to get to know people is through clubs and through work. You're not instantly going to have a strong social network, it'll take time; just become a "yes man" and not refuse any invitations for social events offered by colleagues or people from any clubs.

 

[tris-]

well im moved in and the worst thing about it: mobile internet is fucking shite and i still have 18 months of contract left. ive used a truck load of my allowance just getting on fh and my bank account, and thats with images turned off.

picked a good day to explore. turns out a new national dance institute has just opened. they got an open top bus out and loads of dancers and paraded through the town to the building, and then about 200+ of us all did the same dance together infront of the building!

 

[old.Tohtori]

is seen as being rude and ignorant.

Ignorant and rude to go voer and ask "Mind if i sit here?"

No wonder UK ha a reputation it does if polite conversation is a problem

 

[Ch3tan]

Ahh jesus tris-. Did not realise you were getting mobile broadband, I would have told you how shite it is.

How long have you had it? Usually a 14 day cancellation on all contracts. Try your best to get out of it mate.

 

[Lamp]

A hunchback walks into a bar

If he walks into a French bar, the patrons would maybe look once, then shrug nonchalantly and carry on talking. No big deal.

If he walks into an English bar, you can guarantee they'll be constant sn iggerings and he'll probably end up getting glassed

 

[old.windforce]

Join a teamsport instead of karate. Martial art tends to be pretty individual

Pick up a girl from a dating site or anywhere and be nice enough to get introduced even if
it doesn't work out

i don't know but thats what i would do in your situation

 

[tris-]

martial arts is individual?
what Ma have you been training? im not sure how you can even train any MA without a partner. my last kungfu class had 15-20 of us all training in pairs or 3s. going out for meals outside of class wasnt unusual either.

 

[Wonk]

Hapkido is a mix between Jujutsu and Shotokan if im not mistaken (correct me if im wrong tris) - You can't really train either of those without physical contact

 

[tris-]

that is why i dont understand why it is an individual sport?
and im joining ju jitsu not karate ive also found a buddhist centre round the corner that runs tai chi, yoga and a load of other shit thats worth looking in to.
there is a dating agency that runs 'singles events' as well as being an agency. ive always thought those kinds of things would be pretty shit, but as windforce says it might be worth lookin in to in my situation!

 

[Wonk]

uhm, Tai chi is quite individual actually. It's pretty, but not effective at all. Like 70% of the sparring is without a partner according to one of my mates.

and im joining ju jitsu not karate

my mistake, I thought you were doing hapkido

 

[tris-]

tai chi its self is yes, but a group of people in a place = people to talk to.

 

[tris-]

i did do hapkido in my home town, but they dont teach it here.

and how can you say tai chi is not effective, that blind guy in mortal kombat is the shizzle.

 

[Ormorof]

Ignorant and rude to go voer and ask "Mind if i sit here?"

No wonder UK ha a reputation it does if polite conversation is a problem

not really a fair assumption

most people go to pubs in the UK with the intention of catching up with friends/having fun with friends etc if someone came on their own and just saw with me and my friends we would probably think he was either a) an oddball/lunatic or b) doing it for a bet

in a bar or club thats a bit different as you do end up meeting and chatting to anyone whos willing to listen

edit: though i suppose its up to the individual, i hate talking to random weirdos on trains and buses but have a friend who does it all the time (but she struggles to shut up most of the time anyway! ) so i guess its the same in bars/pubs etc

 

[old.Tohtori]

in a bar or club thats a bit different as you do end up meeting and chatting to anyone whos willing to listen

I think that's what i said earlier, not a pub thing to do as it's a more private sitting place, but in a bar/club it's a valid way to make friends.

And i was merely going with what was told to me happens

 

[Cemeterygates]

does this actually work though?
maybe its just where im from, as youd probably get smashed in the face with a bottle or something.

It can work, guess it's down to location really, i've had a fair few incidents of that kinda thing at gigs/rock pubs an shit.

Trying to track down a pub that caters for your sorta music taste might be worth a crack.