Worst 'meal' youve made?

[tris-]

I was experimenting about a year ago of how I could get protein in me without any effort.
I blended 4 boiled eggs in either milk or water, thinking it would taste the same as just eating boiled eggs.

WRONG.
It smelt like the inside of a rotten cows arse and tasted like satans very own shit.

I have read of people blending tuna up with fresh orange, fuck that.

 

[Vladamir]

I've done tuna and tango - managed a mouthful before i wretched, fucked it off and had some whey instead.

 

[tris-]

Weird how blending it up makes it taste like total gash.

 

[megadave]

When i was a kid, me and a friend of mine, after a long day of burning stuff would come home and just throw a load of ingredients together and fry/microwave them. None of them were ever proper recipes and included completely random stuff.

I don't think anything we made was edible

 

[pikeh]

Oh christ, I think pretty much every meal I cooked throughout Uni was awful. I didn't really experiment much, but one incident springs to mind, when I bought some cheese and chicken (or something) slices from the dodgy co-op up the road, and one of them inside the pastry was completely gelatin, like the stuff inside the rim of pork pies. The texture and taste was enough to make me vomit.

 

[Lamp]

Thank God for Indian & Chinese take-aways then !

/uber drool

 

[tris-]

thank god for radioactive colours you mean?

 

[Lamp]

yeah but it tastes GOOD !

Anyone who doesn't like curry can help themselves to 5 litres of Tris's Eggy Bowel Basher

 

[nath]

Luminescent curry and Megan Fox, gah, you've got such unrefined tastes .

 

[Lamp]

How about eating curry off megan fox ?

Sec, Meg...just need to heat my nan bread up...THERE ! Good girl

 

[nath]

Hmm, naan, mango chutney and hot sweaty AIDS.

 

[Sparx]

i once put a yorkie in a pot noodle, that wasnt nice

 

[Garaen]

Tomato ketchup and nutella sandwhich anyone?

 

[Mikah75]

I like tuna from a can and in a sandwich etc but i heard and saw of these tuna pasta bakes. So I made the pasta, made a pasta bake sauce with cream etc, mixed in the tuna and put cheese on top and it was fucking disgusting. Straight in the bin.

 

[Ch3tan]

If you are going to blend eggs, for the love of all that is good, do it raw.

 

[Cerb]

Ive been wondering...would tuna with pasta and regualr tomato pasta sauce work?!?

 

[Huntingtons]

blue-finned tuna is as exstinct as the panda t.t

 

[old.Tohtori]

Well, i've been known to experiment a lot, but i've never really done anything that didn't taste atleast edible.

I think the worst was when i tried making some coconut chocolate cookie stuff, tasted mostly like burnt butter when it was done.

 

[tris-]

If you are going to blend eggs, for the love of all that is good, do it raw.

They have less bioavailability than cooked eggs though.

 

[Ezteq]

lol like mike I actually tried something that wasn't totally mental (pot noodle and a yorkie...seriously? Oo) I thought I'd do something with what we had in the fridge at the time which was half a bottle of mead, some pork medalions, spuds and the usual dairy produce so I thought I'd marinaide the pork in mead and cook it so the mead reduced and made a nice sweet sticky coating, and do dauphinour potatoes to go with it.

Simple enough (so I thought...) bearing in mind I've made dauphinour (made but can't spell probably) potatoes about 300 times before I thought I was safe but they didn't work and were rock hard with the sauce all kind of bleeh like babysick and the meat was tough as old boots and the mead had turned in to something resembling phlegm; as tris so elequantly said, total gash.

Not, I have to say, my finest hour tbfh.

then again I rather like it when one of us makes a meal that stinks because its a legitimate excuse to call a takeaway.

 

[Sparx]

(pot noodle and a yorkie...seriously? Oo)

in my defence i was hammered and i thought i like yorkie, i also like pot noodle surely if i like both, combining both will be super good. It wasn't.

 

[Helme]

My sister decided to add apples to potato gratin..

 

[Hawkwind]

Was making a veg stir fry, just started added the sauce made from Peanut Butter and Marmite and suddenly got the urge to pee. Came back and the wife was stiring away at the wok. She started adding something from a tin. When I asked what it was she said she wanted some tuna in it. uke:

I could not even taste it let alone try to eat eat.

 

[old.Tohtori]

My sister decided to add apples to potato gratin..

Taters and apples work if you work them nice.

Was making a veg stir fry, just started added the sauce made from Peanut Butter and Marmite and suddenly got the urge to pee. Came back and the wife was stiring away at the wok. She started adding something from a tin. When I asked what it was she said she wanted some tuna in it.

Well marmite-peanutbutter sauce would make me want to blow my culinary brains out already

 

[Hawkwind]

When I lived in Oman for a year I really started to miss cheese cake. So I asked the kitchen staff if they knew how to make it. To my utter suprise they said yes and would make it tomorrow for me.

Next day I arrived at 12 sharpe in the officers mess for my cheese cake. What I got was a standard cake sponge which had been cooked with cheddar cheese on top. It was served with custard.

 

[Hawkwind]

Well marmite-peanutbutter sauce would make me want to blow my culinary brains out already

Take a couple of table spoons of Peanut Butter add marmite and chili flakes to taste. Then add some hot water. Really does taste exactly like a traditional Singpore Satay.

 

[Mikah75]

Oh dear, that one sounds the worst by far Hawkwind lol. Did you taste it? I'd actually blow chunks straight away.

 

[old.Tohtori]

Take a couple of table spoons of Peanut Butter add marmite and chili flakes to taste. Then add some hot water. Really does taste exactly like a traditional Singpore Satay.

I'm not one to judge, but peanut butter AND marmite(while both work in moderation in cooking) together just makes me go; "umm..."

Then again, satay sauce and tuna work nicely by my taste so, different strokes.

 

[Ezteq]

LOL @ that cheesecake, that is so sweet! did you eat it to be polite??

B2's x aupair from when he was little got hired on to work for the sultan of brunai and when she was on vacation he phoned her (she was in a whole different country) and said he wanted her apple pie and could she be at the airport where he had his jet waiting for her...it would return her to the vacation when the pie was made Oo


if it was me i'd of just made a few and frozen them but hay ho.

 

[Sparx]

for more interesting meal ideas

This is why you're fat.