What would you do?

[Everz]

Going through a bit of a shitter atm. The girlfriend is in hospital with a pretty serious illness (pancreatisis) and as such all day up hospital staying with her, past few days, especially she looked loads better and was back her old self. However during the night she took a turn for the worst and is currently off having a thing fitted in her neck, it killed me today to see her crying and scared but I told her to be brave and held back.

I'm lost though, am I doing the right thing? I don't want to show anything but a brave face around her, as she's the one going through this and it should only be about her. I'm just lost at what to do, almost a guilt that I'm going home and just playing daoc whilst she suffers.

Fuck I just want her well! Most of the above made no sense but rambling makes me feel like I'm doing something for her rather then sitting on my tod. :/

 

[Bahumat]

Stay strong for her. She will be coming to terms with everything and will need support!
Hospitals are very very boring places. If you can, bring her a laptop and put some tv shows on, or an mp3 player etc. Books or magazines if she's that type of girl.

I would ask her what they (dr's) have been doing/plan to do. It will be easier to discuss it with you than her parents etc.

 

[TdC]

harsh situation man. thing is hospitals won't let you be there 24x7, and you simply can't be there all the time.

however...when you *are* there, I'd say positive realism is the way to go. She's ill, it's painful, but they are going to make her well again. It will take a while, and it's not pleasant in any way shape or form, but they will fix her up and things are going to be fine in the future.

tbh, if it were my girl, I'd try to be there all the time. I'd sit in her room reading or whatever. I'd find out from the docs everything there is to know about her situation. Get her whatever she wants. Send her cards to let her know I'm thinking about her. Hold her hand and tell her she's going to be well, she's brave and once she's had a shower (hehe) she's going to look amazing like she always does.

So, until she's back on her hind legs again, chin up mate. Good luck to both of you!

 

[Yoni]

Not a lot I can say, it is a horrible situation. No one knows better that you what she needs right now, so just be her person. As for feeling guilty, just don't, you need to do what you need to do to get yourself and her through this... And if it helps you to play DAOC with some supportive friends then you should do that.

Please take care of yourself and I really hope your girlfriend recovers soon *hugs*

 

[TdC]

Please take care of yourself

super remark from Yoni, spot on. DO make sure you get enough sleep / food / rest mate. It's really important that you're fit as you can be for the coming period of time.

 

[Calaen]

Some of the Colitis meds I was given a couple of years ago, gave me a small case of Pacreatitis, it was absolutely awful. just make sure you visit regular and don't be sitting around her all day long, as you end up with nothing being said and it'll end up getting you down. Take breaks for yourself, and when you return you feel a bit better for it, especially once you start seeing improvements!

 

[Everz]

Cheers, least I'm doing the right thing, like I said it ain't the nicest thing to see, especially as they're monitoring here extremely closely currently.. get proded and poked for all sort of tests during the night. Still the plus side all her nurses seem well sound, even saw a lass who used to visit our student house working there, slightly awkward 'alright' made me laugh. Her neck thing looks well painful but after that she was in a cheery mood but set for another night of being moved about and shit, spose where the guilt comes from as I'm smashing virtual skulls.

Can't really bring stuff as she usually that tired or being winged around for tests and such, as noted, they have her on high alert and shes under a constant supervision. Just she been extremely unlucky in this whole thing, she's not a drinker and quite a healthy eater yet still end up with that.. makes no sense hah.

That thing said, the Wolves match is tommorow so it's going to be a tough choice whether to go.

Spoiler

thats a joke

 

[opticle]

Everyone else has already said everything worth saying, but all the best mate. It's a horrible situation and it's not easy, don't worry about the "right" way to be. There isn't one. Just be there for her, listen to her and be supportive. Sometimes these things just happen to people we care about and we have to do our best for them

All the very best to her and yourself and her family and friends.

 

[mycenae]

Pancreatitis is horrid and v painful, so huge hugs and best wishes to her and to you. The hospital and the staff will do everything necessary to look after her in terms of her illness and physical needs, so you need to be there for emotional ones. Visit as much as you can, but take stuff to do (kindle/ipad/iphone/book etc) and do the same for her if you can. Neck lines are nasty to look at if you've never seen one before, but will actually save her a lot of pain and faff in the long run, as she won't need cannulas in her hands and arms which need replacing after 3 or 4 days. Make absolutely sure you get enough rest yourself, and that you eat properly, and also that YOU have someone to sound off to emotionally if you feel like being less positive about her situation. You sound as though you are being very supportive and just what she needs. Poor Vae has been in this situation with me a few times....its very tiring to sit in hospital all day, but massively appreciated by those you're sitting with. Certainly don;t feel guilty about playing DAOC when you're home, its your way of relaxing and there is nothing wrong with that.
If there is something you don't understand or want to know, please feel free to message me

 

[MYstIC G]

As everyone has already said Everz you're doing the right thing.

My missus was in hospital for 2-3 weeks just over a year ago and it was absolutely draining doing: Work -> Hospital -> Phone calls (after kicking out time) -> Lack of sleep worrying -> Work

Bottom line is do everything you can for her, then do whatever you need to do for you to keep you on the level.

Hope your lady gets better soon mate.