What Does a CV look like?

[old.Y-it-Earp]

Eeeeem im compiling a CV here, and getting quite frustrated about how it should be laid out and what details should be contained in it.

Does anybody have a clue what a proffessional CV looks like?

Just to set me straight on a course of action as i dont want it looking naff or anything.


Cheers

 

[bodhi]

My CV looks like this.


Hi.



I 0wn.


Thx.

 

[Wazzerphuk]

You're 20 and you don't know what should be in a CV? Are you some kind of mongloid retard?

 

[Summo]

This prolly isn't the best place to ask for CV advice. Google will no doubt turn up some good CV webbehs - try some recruitment ones. They always have tips.

I personally favour Bodhi's style. Short, sweet and slightly offensive. I'll take him!

 

[Will]

Originally posted by SomeGuy
I personally favour Bodhi's style. Short, sweet and slightly offensive. I'll take him!

What, and take Wazz's sloppy seconds?

 

[old.Kez]

Here & here, Monstah Monstah Monstah!

 

[old.Jas]

Beware of the voices

 

[Embattle]

CVs are full of shit

 

[old.Jas]

Yeah - theres a CV tip - lie your ass off

 

[Testin da Cable]

so when exactly did you get your PhD?
I...errrrr....found it?

 

[Mr B]

Here's a tip for your CV.

Don't lie.

One thing I hate above all else is someone saying they have 4 years SQL experience and having them in for an interview, and THEN having them unable to answer a simple question about SQL.

In the end, if you lie on your CV you are lieing to yourself and you'll end up in a job you hate.

Trust me on this



B

 

[old.[V^V]Azazel]

One thing I hate above all else is someone saying they have 4 years SQL experience and having them in for an interview, and THEN having them unable to answer a simple question about SQL.

F**king graduates

 

[Embattle]

Originally posted by Mr B
Here's a tip for your CV.

Don't lie.

One thing I hate above all else is someone saying they have 4 years SQL experience and having them in for an interview, and THEN having them unable to answer a simple question about SQL.

In the end, if you lie on your CV you are lieing to yourself and you'll end up in a job you hate.

Trust me on this



B

No but if you've had 2 years bragging it up to 4 isn't a problem...most CVs are still full of shit

 

[Testin da Cable]

if I do not think your cv's valid you don't even get an invite mate

 

[old.[V^V]Azazel]

No but if you've had 2 years bragging it up to 4 isn't a problem...

I would say that depends on the knowledge of the person who is interviewing you .....

 

[Testin da Cable]

Originally posted by [V^V]Azazel

I would say that depends on the knowledge of the person who is interviewing you .....

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ph34R!!2


/me slinks off

 

[xenon2000]

Never lie, just "bend the truth". Works for me anyway

 

[Mr B]

No but if you've had 2 years bragging it up to 4 isn't a problem...most CVs are still full of shit

I bin the majority of CVs I get straight away...based on poor formatting, simple spelling/grammar errors etc.

A bit harsh? Not at all, if they can't get a CV right (which presumably they feel is fairly important) I dunno what sort of a mess they'll make with all the systems they'll be designing and implementing.

The one time I went against my initial gut reaction to bin a CV (boss wanted to get him in for an interview anyway), guy turned out to be a complete muppet and I walked out of the interview after 2 mins.

You *CAN* blag 2 -> 4 years, but you'll have to know your stuff inside-out back-to-front and upside-down. I got so fed up with people lying that I don't even bother with interviewing them properly straight off the bat, I simply hand them a set of questions to answer - ranging from extremely simple to stuff that I know is impossible - to stretch them and prevent and/or encourage them to bullshit at me.

If you know your stuff you KNOW when something is impossible - and I hate people who waffle or bullshit whilst they're trying to find a solution.

and...yes...I do occasionally get people saying "can't be done." straight away...which always makes me smile.



B

 

[old.twilight]

It also always helps to tailor your cv based on the job you're applying for- highlighting the bits that might be particularly relevant to the job specs and deemphasising the irrelevant bits.

 

[old.Sprocket]

Only lamers look for jobs, if you are any good at whatever you do, the works comes looking for you

 

[Testin da Cable]

I must be really really lame then, as I look for work even though people tell me I'm rather good at what I do :/

 

[Sar]

So that's why the pr0n industry has been hounding me for the last six months...

I thought it was an overdue bill :/

 

[Mr B]

Only lamers look for jobs, if you are any good at whatever you do, the works comes looking for you

You'll still need a CV though esp if the employer is an IIP member (Investors In People) - which most large UK firms are.

I've been headhunted even when I was shit at my job - being headhunted is more a case of who you know rather than what you know.



B

 

[old.FLC VoodooChile]

Originally posted by Sprocket
Only lamers look for jobs, if you are any good at whatever you do, the works comes looking for you

Selling your butt isnt a job the rest of us want to do mate

VC