The Dear Hunter

Oro

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Mar 3, 2004
Messages
691
Ham reached the end of the passageway and once more took out the large key to open the door there. A small amount of snow slipped down inside the passage as he opened it up to the outside world. He clambered out onto the snow and looked around him. Just as before, to the west in the distance, he could make out a large number of ice striders, half hidden by the trees. They gave the appearance of milling around but he knew now that they only appeared to be moving randomly. The queen would be influencing every movement.
"I are not stupid. Wait. Yes I am." he muttered to himself. He set off in the direction of the striders. He moved cautiously as he approached them. He didn't want to get too close. In truth he didn't want to go anywhere near them but he couldn't think of anything else.
When he felt he was close enough he stopped and crouched in the snow. He scooped up a handful of snow and brought both hands together around it, compressing it.
"One snowball..."
He got to work on another.


Seal's eyes shot open. He felt hot but more or less lucid. He tried to rub the sleep from his eyes with his hands then remembered he only had flippers, "Whiskers, you conceited bugger. I am so going to get you back for this. Sometime. If I can be bothered."
Sniffing the air, he wrinkled his nose, "Dem hibbies, dey be here..." he said to himself, mimmicking the way he heard the trolls speak. He flipped himself over onto his stomach and waddled towards the edge of the tower. Looking down on the scene below, he saw Hibernians everywhere and in the middle of the courtyard, Tight standing there transfixed while a tiny lurikeen advanced towards him. Seal could make out fangs.
Seal chuckled to himself. He felt rested and powerful. One carrot coming right up! He focused his powers and recited the spell to polymorph the vampire. He felt the power building and he was ready to unleash the spell. Then he realised something was wrong. The power kept building. Inwardly he just shrugged. Ok, it would be a BIG carrot.
Seal was getting worried now. He liked vegetable produce as much as the next man. Er, seal. But this was going to be a rather a large one. He just hoped nobody would get squashed when the vampire was turned into what he figured would be a bit of a prize winning carrot.
Finally he got the power under control enough so he could unleash it. Down in the courtyard, the vampire seemed to be levitating so he could get at Tight's neck.
The Seal let fly with the spell. His whole body glowed bright blue and down in the courtyard swirling flames rose up around Snotwheeze.
"Hmm that hasn't happened before." said the Seal, to nobody in particular.

Snotwheeze shrieked in pain and fell backward from Tight. The Midgardians scrambled away from him. The Hibernians looked on in confusion, knowing they should try to help but having no idea what they could do. The flames around Snotwheeze grew and changed. It was hard to see him within but they could see something, writhing. The flames took on an outline and grew and grew. In a few seconds, the shape they took on was many times larger than a troll and still growing. Inside the burning shape, Snotwheeze was changing form.
The flames stopped abruptly and there was a roar. No longer a lurikeen, Snotwheeze was now in the shape of a large dragon that nearly filled the courtyard.

"Whoops." said the Seal.
 

Oro

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Mar 3, 2004
Messages
691
Two in one day. Fingers crossed, will have this finished by the end of the week, time permitting of course :)

If you're wondering WTF at what Seal has done, blame Tesla for specifically asking for dragons a looooooong time ago :D
 

Oro

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Mar 3, 2004
Messages
691
Ham ran as fast as he could for the secret entrance to Bledmeer Faste. Not far behind him were many, many Ice Striders, rapidly gaining ground. One or two of them had splashes of snow on their heads from very accurately thrown snowballs. Snowballs thrown by trolls hurt. Troll children weren't encouraged to snowball fight as they tended to come home concussed. He wasn't sure if he'd make it to the tunnel before the striders but it would be fair to say he was highly motivated. More and more striders poured out from the trees. Ham had badly misjudged the numbers in there. His legs pumped rhythmically as his lumbering gait took him closer to the passage entrance. The doorway was just ahead of him now. A few steps more... and in.
He didn't stop to close the door behind him but instead continued to charge along the passageway.
Risking looking back over his shoulder, he saw the striders reach the entrance and pause. An extra few seconds for which he was grateful. He knew they would not hold there long. In fact, he was counting on it. He reckoned that the queen would just be making sure her children weren't about to hit any major traps. Sure enough, it wasn't long before the chittering sound of striders echoed up the passage. Ham grimaced. At least he would be out the other end. He reached the inner door and yanked the handle to open it. He didn't care how much noise it made. Exiting the passage, he ran straight to the nearest window and with his booming troll voice yelled out in Hibernian, "YO HIBBIES! UP HERE YOU BASTARDS. COME AND GET ME!"
He immediately turned and ran to the top of the tower and prayed his timing was right.

Down in the courtyard, everyone was stunned, not least of all Snotwheeze. He looked around in confusion. The ground was unnaturally far away from his face, he felt scaly. Somehow the things that mattered to him before just didn't seem quite so important now. He wanted to burn and eat. He had an inexplicable urge to find a huge mound of treasure and go to sleep on it for a very long time. He looked around the courtyard at those that were there. Insects to him, all of them. There was the sound of a troll shouting up in the tower. He turned and looked upwards, as did many Hibernians. Ham could be seen at a window shouting then disappearing back inside. Snotwheeze roared, finally his quarry was before him. He breathed a cone of fire up at the tower and flames shot forward from his mouth blackening the stone around the window and licking inside like the flames themselves were alive.
"Bring him to me" he rasped. Hibernian soldiers hesitated then ran for the tower, with casters running behind them.

Tesla's eyes narrowed. Time to move. She ducked down and quickly ran for the front gate, where few Hibernians were watching, it being directly opposite the tower. She ran to one side and approached a Hibernian archer staring slack jawed at the dragon. Gathering speed she leaped and delivered a flying kick to the side of his head, sending him sprawling onto the ground. Before he could recover, she was on him, twisting his head sharply, snapping his neck. He died with barely a sound. She grabbed the Hibernian's bow, quiver and cloak. Checking she hadn't been discovered, she pulled the cloak around her and drew the hood over her head, as far as it would go. She hefted the bow and tested its balance. Not bad at all. Give Hibernians their due, they knew how to make a bow. She purposely marched towards the wooden stairs leading to the battlements, looking for a good position for some target practice. There was no way she could get to the tower, which would have been her preference. Quickly scanning her eyes around, she reached a decision and made for the area above the gate. There was an overhanging roof that would make a reasonable platform. Taking a running jump onto the support posts, she was halfway up before she had to grip it properly. The ice and snow made the post slippery but she easily swung one leg up and over before she started to slip. She was quickly on top landing in a crouch, and dropped her body flat, crawling to the edge. Now she had a good view inside the keep.
Notching her first arrow, she growled low in her throat, "Finally. My turn."

Jarl Bledmeer shouted at his fellow Midgardians, "WITH ME!"
All attention was on the tower and the dragon. The Midgardians swarmed the nearest guards. Tight charged with them, all the time looking around for something he could use as a mattock. A lurikeen assassin leaped out at him but didn't even make contact. Tight plucked him out of the air.
"You will do." and as he said that he began swinging the hapless lurikeen around.
"Nice balance, good action, make good smishing."
Swinging the screaming lurikeen over his head he charged the guards and slapped them with their own comrade. Hibernians went flying in all directions as he mowed through them swinging the lurikeen, who was rapidly becoming more bloody with every swing.
Jarl Bledmeer was right in there beside him and grabbed the first sword he could from a fallen Hibernian.
Eyeing up Tight and his rather unusual weapon, he said, "We REALLY have to talk."
"Smish now, talk later." rumbled Tight happily.

Snotwheeze was rather surprised that when he belched he incinerated a large part of the neighbourhood though not entirely unhappy with the effect. He was a bit unused to his current form and he tottered a bit uncertainly. However, he was rapidly working out which muscles did what. Ah yes, he wiggled his bottom and his tail lashed out. Handy. The wings would take some getting used to. Right, time to kill. He looked around for the Midgardian prisoners, who were all now merrily wreaking havoc on the Hibernians that had been formerly guarding them. Snotwheeze knew that they only temporarily had the advantage. Most of the Hibernians were distracted but had more than sufficient numbers to quell this little bit of rebellion. Snotwheeze laughed and his head shot forward, grabbing a hapless Midgardian soldier into the air. He jerked his head back and launched the norseman into the sky, waiting underneath for gravity to do its work and waited with his jaws wide open. The norseman screamed as first he flew up then plumetted back down. His scream ended in a gurgling noise then silence.

Snotwheeze decided he liked being a dragon.
 

Oro

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Mar 3, 2004
Messages
691
Ham made it around the corner from the secret doorway just as the striders burst through into the keep. Loud chittering echoed off the flagstones but the tip-tap-tip of their chittinous armour stopped momentarily. Ham heard them sniffing the air as he waited around the corner. He desperately needed the Hibernians to appear right now or he was going to be strider food. There was a scraping noise then a hiss then a scream followed by the sounds of a struggle. Ham wondered if he dare peer around the corner. He couldn't resist, he had to know what was happening. Without realising he was holding his breath he poked his head slightly around the corner. Three striders were tearing into a lurikeen assassin. Ham quickly withdrew. They must have uncovered him sneaking ahead. Ham slunk away up the remaining stairs to the roof.
Shortly afterwards there were shouts of alarm and warning as the Hibernians discovered the latest visitors to Bledmeer Faste.
Ham smiled grimly and went out onto the roof. He could do no more for now as he couldn't fight the Hibernians directly. Out on the roof he found the Seal, concious and alert and hiding beside the pyramid of stone that marked the point of the roof.
"Seal? What you doing there?" he asked.
"Ham! My friend. My good good friend! Glad to see you friend Ham! My friendly friend of Ham. Friend. Friendly type chap. Of Ham. Er."
Ham rolled his eyes, "What you done Seal?"
Right at that moment Seal was glad that he couldn't blush and even if he could it would be hidden under layers of white fluffy fur.
"Uh, nothing. But something happening in courtyard Ham. You should look."
Ham eyed the Seal suspiciously but said nothing more. Crouching, he moved to the edge and looked over into the courtyard.
"By great troll fathers, HOW DID A DRAGON GET HERE?" he exclaimed.
Seal shuffled his rear flippers a bit.
"Um, that lurikeen vampire chap kind of turned into it."
"Can vampires do that?"
"This one did."
"Thor's left nut, we are so far up Auditlen creek."

Interestingly, at that exact moment, Thor's left nut was in an excruciating amount of pain. He really wasn't proving very successful regarding getting his wicked way with godesses, demi-godesses and even mere mortals. He had been reading up on how other gods had managed to seduce women down the ages and had tried appearing as a shower of gold, a mountain goat and now a fox. In the middle of a fox hunt. Some dog had just taken a bite at his godly equipment and that had been the final straw. He now also smelled of burnt dog which is possibly the only thing that smells worse than wet dog. Thor was begging for someone to pray for a lightning bolt. He was ready to fry a small continent.


Below them, Ham could hear the sounds of vicious fighting, as more striders entered the keep and the Hibernians engaged them. The striders were disadvantaged as there wasn't much room to manouver their huge chitinous frames but at the same time, the narrow corridors prevented many Hibernians engaging them simultaneously. Ham had hoped that he and the other Midgardians would be able to escape in the confusion, he hadn't thought for a moment he would have to try and win a battle, and certainly hadn't bargained on a dragon somehow entering the keep.
"Seal," he said, "you change things to other things. Change the dragon. I dunno. Into carrot."
The Seal coughed, "Erm, I don't seem to have the power just now."
"Still recovering?"
"Uh. Yeh. That must be it. In fact, I would definately say I recently over-exerted myself."
Ham rubbed his chin and looked at the carnage happening below him. There weren't many Midgardians and they were hard pressed by Hibernian soldiers and random blasts of fire from the dragon. Fortunately there wasn't much room for the dragon to manouever and it was having difficulty targetting them. Jarl Bledmeer could clearly be seen driving the Midgardians around the keep but every time they got near the gate to try and escape a blast of fire would cut them off. They were having to dodge in and out to keep the dragon from getting a clear target at them. There weren't many left. Ham watched a Hibernian archer take aim at the Midgardians and braced himself to watch a countryman die. The Hibernian archer keeled over for no apparent reason. Ham's eyebrows shot up. He looked around and tried to understand what had happened.

Wait a moment.

There was an arrow sticking out of the Hibernian's back. Ham immediately looked for any high areas in the keep. There, just above the gate. Ham grinned broadly. A green cloak lay on the roof above the gate. Ham knew just who would be under that cloak.
"We still have friends but need to get dragon."
Haha get dragon. Inwardly he shuddered at those simple words.
Ham looked over the edge of the roof. It was a reasonable drop to the battlements. He could probably make it without breaking something.
"Need to get dragon before dragon get brother troll."
Seal looked down at the Midgardians running harried by the Hibernians and the dragon.
"Won't be long now, they are nearly cornered. You should save yourself Ham."
"Seal." said Ham slowly, "Ever say leave brother troll again, Ham snaps neck. Got it?"
Seal opened his mouth once and closed it again without saying anything. He very quickly nodded.
Ham frowned. He couldn't hurt the dragon if it was as Seal had said, the little vampire. It would still be Hibernian. He didn't fancy his chances if he let the dragon get the first hit in just so he could retaliate. He stood there on the battlements, impotent and frustrated.


Tesla picked her targets carefully. It was always one of the Hibernians that was out of line of sight of their comrades even if just for a moment. She had taken down three already with deadly accuracy. It was barely a dent in their numbers. She prayed that the dragon wouldn't spot her. In truth she was amazed it hadn't yet. Then again, she wondered at the disappearance of the vampire and the emergence of the dragon. It moved clumsily. She wasn't sure how dragons were supposed to move but this one moved as if it was unsure of how to control itself properly. She was just glad it hadn't gone airborne, as it would find targetting her fellows much easier.
Tesla spied a Hibernian druid at the back of the fighting, chanting and preparing to cast healing spells. A moment to aim and she let fly with another arrow.
Damn, only the shoulder.
Quickly notching another arrow, she took aim again while the druid grunted in pain and looked around frantically to see where it came from. Just as Tesla was about to fire her second shot there was a moment where the druid saw her and opened his mouth to shout to his friends. The arrow loosed from her bow and flew straight towards him, catching him in the neck. He helplessly pawed at the arrow as he fell to the ground.
"Get a grip Tes, that first shot was awful." she scolded herself angrily.
Tesla felt the world come to a standstill. Everything was as it was but she felt a tremendous will bent towards her and give her its attention. She looked across the courtyard and saw the dragon turn its head and focus both baleful eyes on her.
This is going to get messy she thought to herself.
The dragon drew back its head and Tesla instinctively knew what was coming. She scrambled up from her prone position and leaped to the left of the roof just as it exploded in a shower of sparks and wood.
Tesla ran along the battlements as fast as she could. The door at the end into the tower was her only hope.

Snotwheeze laughed at the small female running terrified from his mighty self. Quickly realising where she was heading, he turned and blasted the battlements just ahead of her. Pieces of equipment lying around and dead bodies combusted immediately but the ancient stonework of Bledmeer though blackened, held. He saw her skid to a halt and pause. Laughing again he prepared another blast. He growled as it took him a few seconds to manouever his huge frame around for a clear shot. There had to be an easier way to target these insects. He took another deep breath and hosed the battlements with raging fire. He couldn't see the figure on the battlements any more. Suspicious that he still hadn't killed it, he looked around. He snarled as he scanned the battlements. The norse female was opening the door to the tower. He howled and tried to turn a bit more.
Involuntarily, his wings beat in frustration and Snotwheeze paused. He felt his body lift slightly. He beat them again. He could control them. Snotwheeze forgot the norsewoman momentarily as this new sensation filled him. As a vampire in bat form it had felt like waving his arms. This was different. He beat his wings again and howled in victory.


Jarl Bledmeer and his remaining five men were pushed back into a corner of the keep. They were still fighting. Mercifully the dragon had diverted its attention elsewhere and the burning blasts had stopped for the moment, at least towards them. He had watched the dragon blasting parts of his precious keep. It infuriated him to see the Faste he was so proud of first invaded then abused like this. He channeled that fury through his tired limbs.
The big troll, Tight, worried him slightly. He was now using a mattock like any self respecting Midgardian might, but in his other hand, he held a dead celt and was using it as a shield. Whenever the body became too bloodied to defend with, he'd pick up another and use it in exactly the same way. He had to conceed it had a wonderfully demoralising effect on the Hibernians attacking, but at the same time it just didn't seem... right. Only trolls could be so bloodthirsty. And the goon seemed happy, even though he was probably moments away from dying. Still, the men took heart from the big troll. Nothing seemed to slow him and they drew strength from that.
He heard a huge roar behind the Hibernians they were fighting and glanced back into the courtyard. There was a mighty beating sound and Jarl Bledmeer saw the dragon flapping its wings and rising into the air, slowly and uncertainly at first then with increasing speed and strength. Dark foreboding filled his heart.


In the tower corridors there was carnage. Shattered chitin carcases and dead Hibernian bodies were strewn throughout the interior. The Hibernians were being pressed back. The strider numbers were just too many for them. Deep within the hive, the Ice Strider queen watched through her childrens' eyes as they pressed the Hibernians back. She was suspicicious as to why they had been let in, but there was much feeding here and revenge for all her children killed over the years, even though some were falling in this battle. The Chillers were her frontline troops, towering insectoid warriors that could hand out massive amounts of damage at close quarters. Behind them were the Frostweavers, hive casters that could harass and freeze the blood of enemies where they stood. The Hibernian enchanters and eldritches could not get in close enough to use their most devastating spells and the battle was not going well for them as gradually their numbers were thinned out. The striders pressed on down to the courtyard, the way carpetted with the green cloaks of dead Hibernians.
Inside her cold mind, the queen smiled. Soon, for the first time ever, a human keep would belong to the Ice Striders.
 

Healer McHeal

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jan 10, 2004
Messages
704
that was worth waiting for imo :), but, still, give more, you keep stopping at places that leave us in suspence!! :D

EDIT: corrections
 

Teslacoil

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Apr 8, 2004
Messages
1,223
Tight charged with them, all the time looking around for something he could use as a mattock. A lurikeen assassin leaped out at him but didn't even make contact. Tight plucked him out of the air.
"You will do." and as he said that he began swinging the hapless lurikeen around.
"Nice balance, good action, make good smishing."
Swinging the screaming lurikeen over his head he charged the guards and slapped them with their own comrade. Hibernians went flying in all directions as he mowed through them swinging the lurikeen, who was rapidly becoming more bloody with every swing.

UNBEATABLE ! HAHAHAHA !

Jarl Bledmeer was right in there beside him and grabbed the first sword he could from a fallen Hibernian.
Eyeing up Tight and his rather unusual weapon, he said, "We REALLY have to talk.""Smish now, talk later." rumbled Tight happily.


Where have i heard this before? ;))))
 

[SS]Gamblor

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Feb 1, 2004
Messages
1,293
well it did have me laughing ....

and on patch day too ...

Roo for something very important =)
 

MaditioneR

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Nov 12, 2004
Messages
21
you should release a book tbh :C this is some good shit, tight and seal makes me crack up alot too xd
 

Healer McHeal

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jan 10, 2004
Messages
704
so whens the rest making its way onto the forum roo? havnt had anything good to read for the past, well, ages :p
 

Tilda

Moderator
Moderator
Joined
Dec 22, 2003
Messages
5,755
Oh it gets better :D
Damini, please PM your agent this page ;)

Tilda
 

cog

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Jan 8, 2004
Messages
540
Just spent a good few hours reading the whole series and what can I say, fucking brilliant :clap:

Now make with the rest of it, I need to find out what happens ;)
 

Oro

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Mar 3, 2004
Messages
691
Most of very final bit written on laptop. Mulled something *really* stupid I hadn't planned before and decided to run with it. What the hey :D

Won't be long, next few days - apols for not finishing last week when expected to - didn't run out of steam, just this pesky thing called real life being damned inconsiderate :D


Once again, thanks for all the really nice things peeps are saying, its much appreciated :)
 

cog

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Jan 8, 2004
Messages
540
Forgot to mention, I loved the 'War and more war' by Trollstoy from TTSV :D laughed quite a bit over that one :drink:
 

Oro

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Mar 3, 2004
Messages
691
Ham leaped from the tower, "Geroniiiiiiiitrollllllll!"
It was a magnificent leap, showing the kind of acrobatic prowess of which the troll fathers would have been proud, flawed by only one small thing.
Halfway down, Ham realised he'd missed the battlements completely and was plummetting towards the actual courtyard itself, a fall sure to break every bone in his great troll frame.
"Trollocks!" he cursed as he realised, quickly followed by "Tweet?"
Ham flapped his arms...wings, and fluttered sideways to land safely on the battlements, where he turned back into his normal self, the only after affect a mild desire to circle above someone and shower them with droppings. He looked up and Seal's black nose was poking over the tower edge with what Hamwas convinced was a fluffy grin underneath it.
Ham gave Seal a quick thumbs up and then ran towards the gate area, from which Tesla was still pot-shotting random Hibernians.

Seal bounced back from the edge of the tower. He'd done something right. His little Sealy heart swelled with pride. He felt different, stronger. Something had changed in him. He had a lot more power than berore though his control was just as tenuous. He felt slightly weak from saving Ham, but he noted that his power didn't seem to drop like it had done before, draining him completely and leaving him exhausted. Now if only he could muster enough to sort out that dratted vampire, but he didn't dare try it.

A Midgardian soldier burst into flame, screaming for a brief moment as his body incinerated. A wave of heat washed over Jarl Bledmeer and the remaining Midgardians. Even Tight registered that this was not normal behaviour for your average person.
"Dat something you don' see every day." he said, "Well not less father Troll doin' the cookin'."
Jarl Bledmeer sighed. Tight had used up two lurikeens and a small Celt now. The psychological damage to the hibernians seemed to outweigh the actual physical damage but it was a marginal call. He was constantly complaining about durability loss on Hibernians and no wonder they had such problems in stand-up fights. Jarl Bledmeer had to bite back asking how Tight knew that Midgardians made better impromtu clubs, he had a horrible feeling he wouldn't like the answer.
Jarl Bledmeer knew this fight was lost. Though they'd eaten through the ranks of the Hibernians, they were now pressed into a corner with nowhere to go. The courtyard walls were behind them. The dragon circled above, delighting in picking them off one by one with pinpoint accurate blasts of fire while the Hibernian soldiers kept them hemmed in. There was nowhere to go, and no help coming. There was himself, Tight, three warriors and a battlehealer remaining.
"Ah who wants to live forever..." he cursed, swinging his sword in a massive arc, more to keep back Hibernians than to do damage.

Snotwheeze circled in the night sky just above the keep. This was the greatest feeling he had ever known. At the back of his mind was the driving, bitter force of his demon master to kill Ham and return to Hibernia, but this power was incredible. Why the troll had to die he had no idea, but die he must. He blew a kiss to the Midgardians, and another burst into flame. Five left, including the magnificent troll. He would kill them all except the troll, who he would make his pet forever.
Snotwheeze saw something was wrong in the tower. The Hibernians should have been out now, carrying the head of that troll, Ham Fisted. He flew around the tower and through the windows he saw Hibernians dying to the Ice Strider onslaught. He howled in rage and beat his wings furiously, picking up speed and flying skyward straight up. Wheeling, he dived and inhaled, ready to let rip with furious flames. Swooping into the courtyard he flew straight at the tower door as the remaining Hiberians ran out, chased by the striders. They saw the dragon charging and leaped to either side of the doorway as Snotwheeze opened his massive jaws and ignited death.
Flame shot forward licking around the doors and into the corridors of the keep, burning and killing Ice Striders as they charged. Chitin cracked and an inhuman screeching could be heard throughout the keep. Creatures of frost and ice, the striders were doubly vulnerable to the fire. They died by the dozen in seconds.
The flames went searing up stairs and around corners. Anything alive in its path died.

The Ice Strider queen howled in agony. So many of her children dying. The pain in her mind crippled her senses. They had a dragon defending Bledmeer! Why had she never seen this before? The loss was staggering, her precious children were dying all through the tower, engulfed in flame. She screamed a silent command to the remaining loved ones. Back down the tunnel my children, it was a trap all along. Retreat from Bledmeer.
The Ice Striders in the tower that still lived turned as one and ran for the secret passageway, their insect legs carrying them at incredible speed just ahead of the searching fire.

Snotwheeze withdrew from the tower, once more arrowing skyward. The tower itself now burned inside. Wheeling, he looked down. A few Ice Striders had made it out into the courtyard and were battling with the Hibernian remnants. The striders there were quite clearly trying to fight a path to the
main gate. Now that was interesting: there were suddenly a lot of striders fleeing from Bledmeer, but they were appearing at some distance from the keep before they started running. Obviously the crafty Midgardians had a secret exit. Snotwheeze was about to fly that way to kill the rest of them when he spotted his one true quarry shambling along the battlements. The orders in his mind overrode his desire to burn and kill the striders.
Hissing, he hovered a moment, then changed direction. He quickly gathered speed and drew his wings in, aiming like a crossbow bolt for Ham. His heavy lidded eyes fixed on the troll. So focused was he on the troll, that he failed to spot the human shape on the roof above the gate, raising up from prone to standing position and taking careful aim with a longbow.

Jarl Bledmeer growled at his troops as they fought, "we're not dying cornered like rats. At my word, we charge."
Experienced as they were, the Midgardians were now exhausted, fighting only on the willpower of the condemned. All grunted acknowledgement.
"FOR MIDGARD!" shouted Jarl Bledmeer.
"FOR BEER!" shouted Tight.
"For ten silver a month and no dental." grumbled one of the soldiers.
Jarl Bledmeer charged the left flank of the Hibernians. Now the Hibernians had the opportunity to circle the Midgardians if they wished, instead of having only one line of attack against them. The Midgardians kept moving though, breaking for the front gate. Opposite them, the striders were also fighting towards the gate.

The Hibernians were pressed at both sides; with very few remaining troops the battle was now more or less even since they were facing both striders and Midgardians at the same time. Nara watched the changing battle from behind his troops. The Hibernian numbers had been decimated by the Striders. He gave orders to a subordinate to oversee the battle and decided it was a prudent time to scout outside Bledmeer - perhaps all the way to Hibernia. He saw a troll running along the battlements and cursed.

That damned heathen had caused them so much trouble and was now likely to cost Nara his command. The striders were between Nara and the battlements on one side, and the Midgardians blocked the way to the other. Nara didn't dare consider the tower. Gods knew what was in there. Nara pulled the hood up on his cloak and began picking his way to the gate. On his way there he pulled a cloak off a fallen Midgardian soldier and stuffed it in his pack.

Ham sensed something in the air above him. He knew what it was without looking. He was halfway along the battlements, no cover before the gate. He ran harder. He saw Tesla rising up on the roof above the gate and prayed the huntress knew what she was doing. He had no desire to be a roast Ham.
Tesla sighted along the notched arrow, aiming at the dragon's left eye. She could do this kind of shot standing on her head normally, but even she was nervous now. She had one shot she reckoned. She licked her lips nervously and frowned as she concentrated on the diving dragon. She saw its huge mouth open and start to breathe in, preparing to exhale flame.
Tesla let fly with the arrow, it sped towards Snotwheeze.
She missed.
The arrow glanced off the dragon's scaly armour at an awkward angle. Tesla's eyes widened and she cursed, hurriedly grabbing another arrow from its quiver. The dragon changed course, now aware of the attacker. She had bought Ham maybe a few seconds, but only by making herself the new target.
The dragon was now flying straight towards her. Tesla notched the arrow and without thinking fired it off at the dragon.
"From Tesla, with love." she muttered.
Her aim was true. It was one of those moments where time slowed down to a crawl and she could follow the path of the arrow as it flew towards the dragon, perfectly aimed. The dragon seemed to register shock as it realised this arrow would be the one that ended its life.
Just before the arrow hit, the dragon disappeared.

The striders finished off the last remaining Hibernians on their side of the keep and ran straight for the main gate and freedom. This left very few Hibernians for the Midgardians to deal with and now they realised they were leaderless. The Midgardians could see a visibile change in the Hibernians. No longer assured of victory they began to panic. One turned and ran to the gate. Very quickly the others did the same. Jarl Bledmeer had to put a restraining hand on Tight's shoulders as Tight continued to pound away.
One Hibernian threw down his sword and held up his hands. Tight grinned at him and he who took this to mean he wasn't going to get beaten to a pulp and relaxed. Tight smacked him on the top of his head and the Hibernian crumpled to the ground unconcious.

Ham skidded to a halt just below the roof where Tesla stood. He turned and looked back along the battlements. There was no dragon. Instead, there was a rather small dog standing with a completely surprised look on its face. It was black with sharply pointed ears and a long snout. Ham looked up but the night sky seemed to have stopped raining dragons. He looked back at the dog then suspiciously towards the top of the tower. Sure enough, Seal was barking happily and clapping his flippers together.

Jarl Bledmeer led the Midgardians chasing after the fleeing Hibernians. They ran straight for the main gate. There was no way the Midgardians could catch them - a bard was clearly beginning to pound on a drum and incant to magically increase their speed. The Hibernians cleared the gate before the Midgardians were even halfwfay to it.
Nevertheless, Jarl Bledmeer and the others ran outside after them. Once outside they stopped immediately. The Hibernians were outside, halted senseless. Around the bottom of the hill were trolls, kobolds, norse and valkyn and even an occasional frostalf. There were many tens of Midgardians. At first Jarl Bledmeer thought it was reinforcements then he realised they were too unkempt and unruly to be soldiers. They looked more like vagabonds, rogues and thieves than fighters of the realm.
A massive female troll stepped forward from the crowd, dressed in shabby leather with axes stuffed in her belt.
"You call this way to greet ladytroll comin' all way out here?"
"Uh...?" said Jarl Bledmeer.
Tight shot foward, "MA!"
The two embraced. Troll hugs are not for the squeamish or anyone who's just eaten heavily but they came out of it apparently unharmed. Tight saw his father in amongst the crowd and waved madly.
The Hibernians emerged from their daze and seeing the small army surrounding them, immediately dropped their weapons.
Jarl Bledmeer wasted no time and approached the female troll, "Jarl Bledmeer, lord of Bledmeer Faste. You are?"
"Tired, hungry and not liking frontiers. Keeping having to scrape infiltrators off boots. That no way respectible lady troll should have to behave."
Jarl Bledmeer almost made a comment about the word 'respectible' but something made him stop. Maybe it was the twin axes, maybe it was that this huge troll looked like she could swat him. Maybe it was the way Tight now had a friendly hand on his shoulder.
"Careful how you speak to Ma." said Tight, good naturedly.
"I be needing somewhere to sleep. Where is best room in keep?" asked Ma.
"Thats MY chambers." exclaimed Jarl Bledmeer, aware he was losing control of the conversation but unaware he'd never actually had control of it.
"Nice gentlenorse like yourself be happy to give ladytroll room while staying and I thanks you for it. Better put that fire out first though."
Ma whistled and a kobold stepped forward.
"Clean tower."
The kobold looked nervously at Jarl Bledmeer.
"Usual stuff? Small and carryable?"
"No idiot. Clean up, not clean out."
The kobold coughed, "Sorry Ma, sure thing."
He beckoned and several other kobolds slouched forward
"Clean Ou...er, Up Crew with me. lets go." he said.
Ma smiled at Jarl Bledmeer, daring him to say something.

Tesla and Ham exited the main gate. Ham had Seal on his shoulder and behind him a small black dog trotted. As soon as the dog saw Tight it started panting heavily, yelped and ran up to him, running around in little circles and jumping up.
"I think it likes you." said Jarl Bledmeer.
"Why dat?" asked Tight.
"Well its trying to hump your left leg."
"Oh yeh." answered Tight.
Tight leaned down and picked up the dog. Its eyes glowed red briefly and everyone took a step back except Tight who seemed quite oblivious to both that and the fact that it seemed to have rather overdeveloped incisors.
"I shall call you Jugulator."
Snotwheeze looked up at his new master adoringly. He was a very happy puppy. he could get used to the new name.

Several hours later as dawn was raising the first faint light, they stood beside a funeral pyre downhill from Bledmeer and Jarl Bledmeer finished the ceremony to see the dead on their way to Valhalla. He beckoned to Tight to light the pyre. Tight raised one arm towards the sky and called down a small lightning bolt to ignite the pyre. Going by his ability lately he figured that would be all he could manage. Unexpectedly the pyre exploded as a massive burst of ball lightning struck it. Bits of burning bodies flew in every direction. He blinked twice. Faintly on the wind Tight was sure he could hear a muffled, godly 'Muhahaha'.
Jarl Bledmeer put his head in his hands.
Tesla tried not to smirk, respect for the dead was one thing, but she wasn't surprised in the slightest these clod trolls couldn't get anything right.
"I'm out of here. That amateur, Blood, said he was coming here and I'm sick of turning down his marriage offers, I'm not sticking around."
Ham turned to Tesla. "Take care dear hunter."
"Huntress."
"s'wot I said." said Ham.
Tesla opened her mouth to speak then saw Ham grinning. Okay, this one wasn't so stupid but that didn't mean he was smart.
"Yeh you too. Good luck whatever it is you lot are up to."
"Thanks, Mother and Father Trolls brought volunteers to help."
Tesla refrained from commenting that the volunteers all had bruises, black eyes and in some cases, broken limbs. She had heard of Ma Fisted but hadn't twigged that Ham was the son of Galplen's most infamous berserker.
She nodded to the others and pulled her hood up and set off, soon out of sight in amongst the nearby trees.

Nara approached the little clot of Midgardians around where Ham stood. One left and headed into the woods. The rest were standing around talking, none attentive. He pulled the Midgardian cloak tight to make sure none of his Hibernian armour showed through and approached Ham, his orders burning bright in his mind. In his right hand, he held a small poisoned dirk. His sense of self preservation warred with his orders, but the will of his master could not be denied by any mere Celt. As with all of those from his village, when they came of age, they were damned.

Ham yawned, "Need sleep. Been long night brother troll."
Tight grinned, "Saw some nice girly trolls with Ma's crew. Might sleep later brother troll."
Jugulator barked, instantly jealous.
A soldier walked through the middle of them. Ham and Tight both frowned at him being rude but didn't realise until it was too late that it was Nara. Nara pulled out the knife quick as a flash and leaned slightly back so he could bring all his force to stab Ham in the throat. He kept falling backwards, an arrow sticking out of his chest. Another rapidly joined it and then a third. Nara hit the ground and didn't move.
Tight looked down in surprise at the dead Hibernian, nudging the corpse with his toe to make sure the Hibernian was dead. Ham chuckled and said to the dead Hibernian, "Tesla sends her love."
He looked out into the forest. From the edge of the trees, Tesla waved then disappeared back in amongst them.
 

haarewin

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jan 19, 2004
Messages
2,756
:D!
i want my very own jugulator :p it was great roo, excellent ending :)
 

Thrinnor

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Dec 22, 2003
Messages
58
Her aim was true. It was one of those moments where time slowed down to a crawl and she could follow the path of the arrow as it flew towards the dragon, perfectly aimed. The dragon seemed to register shock as it realised this arrow would be the one that ended its life.

I call dibs on "Arrow-Time" :D

Superb as always :)
 

Tesla Monkor

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jan 1, 2004
Messages
1,452
Excellent work again, Roo. I feel a bit sorry for Blood, but he can be very silly at times. ^_^

Keep up the excellent work!
 

Aremeriel

One of Freddy's beloved
Joined
Dec 23, 2003
Messages
800
:worthy: :worthy: :worthy:
EXCELLENT (sorry for yelling, but.... )
 

Jayce

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jan 23, 2004
Messages
438
- a bard was clearly beginning to pound on a drum and incant to magically increase their speed.

Someones going to say it so it might as well be me. Bard's use a Lute for speed not a Drum, thats what Mincers use.

Great stroy though, loved it :D
 

Oro

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Mar 3, 2004
Messages
691
Jayce said:
Someones going to say it so it might as well be me. Bard's use a Lute for speed not a Drum, thats what Mincers use.

Bleh sorry. Played a bard from 20-24 about a year+ ago and completely forgot that. Can't edit or would change it. I play fast and loose with the rules when it suits the story but that was just a mistake.

Thanks for the nice feedback peeps. Next up, The Wild Geas, already dropped a few hints and clues in about what's going on. Last Fisted story so will try to make sure the Fisteds, Seal and Jugulator go out in style.

A troll's best friend is his gay vampiric dog :D
 

Dimmer

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
May 9, 2004
Messages
346
I must say 36 pages in a word dokument... and the storry is incredible, though I'm having trouble finding all 5 of you storry's, I would really appresiate if you could mail them to me or post em all here.

If I could I would love to put them on my site for reading/download with your name on ofc.
 

cog

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Jan 8, 2004
Messages
540
Fantastic ending, Im already drooling in anticipation of the Wild Geas :worthy:
 

Dracus

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Dec 24, 2003
Messages
2,242
Teh story teller said:
He was constantly complaining about durability loss on Hibernians.

rofl...I hate it when that happens :p

/Dracus
 

Jeriraa

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Feb 17, 2004
Messages
948
Dimmer said:
I must say 36 pages in a word dokument... and the storry is incredible, though I'm having trouble finding all 5 of you storry's, I would really appresiate if you could mail them to me or post em all here.

If I could I would love to put them on my site for reading/download with your name on ofc.
These are the 1st 3: (links not verified, just pasted from an old post on our own boards)

The Elf, the Troll and the wardrobe
Oh brother Troll, where art thou!
Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Vendo

The 4th is this thread and the 5th is in the making I think. (Or if you mean "Bloodline" then that one is to be found somewhere in this section too, but written by Roo Stercoburn instead Oro and unfinished iirc.)
 

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