Smells

Lamp

Gold Star Holder!!
Joined
Jan 16, 2005
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22,950
*** 3 minutes ago ***

So I'm in *my* room on the computer, and been happily farting away for a good 35 minutes, when the wife passes by to put some towels in the airing cupboard, catches a whiff of the room, then sprays half a can of air-freshener into the room.

Now you need to understand that out of all the rooms in my house (her name's not on the mortgage), this is my one room of solitude. Its MINE. She doesn't go in. She's quite happy to stay out. Its a tiny little room. But its all mine. Its like the garden shed type thing. Only thing I can't do in there is smoke or screw her sister. Apart from that its mine.

Surely I'm allowed to fart as much as I want ? She's never sprayed in there before. Now it smells of chemical flowers. At least the fart smell was natural.

*eyes watering from air freshener now*

Does a man have no privacy even in his own castle ?

Perhaps only in death.

*parp*
 

cHodAX

I am a FH squatter
Joined
Jan 7, 2004
Messages
19,742
Divorce imo, then take the sister for a test drive in your private room to see if she might be a better bet! :p
 

Rookiescot

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jan 16, 2004
Messages
816
Good greif lamp .... you cant just go to the bathroom to float an air biscuit ?
 

Nate

FH is my second home
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Mar 13, 2004
Messages
7,454
Go and fart in her private room then, you pussy. Take the fight to her!!! She may have won the fight, but the battle rages on! Prep yourself, make your body a farting machine and not just any farting machine, THE farting machine. Eat, drink, sleep, but before any of those FART. Destroy her, make her wish she never met your anus.
 

tierk

Part of the furniture
Joined
Feb 16, 2004
Messages
2,884
Go get yerself a couple of XL portions of humus down you just before heading to bed and let off a couple of shots under the duvet. She wont have time to get the airfreshner, though be warned you probably end up sleeping on the couch for this. :cheers:
 

Naetha

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Dec 22, 2003
Messages
1,564
If she's not having to share that room with you (i.e. the farting isn't bothering her) then tell her to piss off with her air freshener. I'd much rather have fart smell than air freshener smell (well, the spray stuff anyway - the more benign stuff is OK).

I get pissed off when other peoples' farts bother me, but if I don't need to be in that room then who cares?
 

fettoken

I am a FH squatter
Joined
Jul 18, 2004
Messages
9,640
So you like your own fart. Imo buy a few tupperware´s and fart in them, then close the lid and save like 10 boxes for such an occation!
 

echome

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Feb 19, 2004
Messages
1,609
Haha that is a proper whine ;-)

But if that is your biggest problem in life, then I envy you my friend.
 

Sparx

Cheeky Fucknugget
Joined
Sep 30, 2005
Messages
8,059
sleep with her sister, in the bed you share. And let her catch you


She wont be spraying anything after that
 

Jarahl

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Dec 29, 2003
Messages
1,781
sleep with her sister, in the bed you share. And let her catch you


She wont be spraying anything after that

Except maybe lead from the shotgun she goes out to buy after seeing that? :)
 

Imgormiel

Part of the furniture
Joined
Apr 18, 2004
Messages
4,372
You all suck!

None of you said 'Smells like teen spirit' for which you would have got rep and lots of :worthy:

But like I said, you all suck :p
 

Nate

FH is my second home
Joined
Mar 13, 2004
Messages
7,454
Nice tactic if anyone pulls a gun on you there Vlad. I suppose your really quick at it too, maybe even faster then a speeding bullet!
 

Bahumat

FH is my second home
Joined
Jun 22, 2004
Messages
16,788
When she's asleep, wake her up and then fart in her mouth. she'll love it!
 

Roalith

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Dec 26, 2003
Messages
743
Go get yerself a couple of XL portions of humus down you just before heading to bed and let off a couple of shots under the duvet. She wont have time to get the airfreshner, though be warned you probably end up sleeping on the couch for this. :cheers:


Dutch oven, you know it makes sense. Same as above but pull the covers over her head.

She'll love you for it. Honest :D
 

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