Out on her royal yacht the Queen was enjoying the sea air when she spied
a man in the water off the port bow - clearly being menaced by a very
large shark.
Through her binoculars she could see it was Christian Ronaldo,
struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a 20 foot shark!
The queen ordered the captain to change course to try and save the poor
man, but she knew the yacht's top speed would never get them there in
time.
At that exact moment a speedboat containing three men wearing white
England shirts sped into view.
One of the men took aim at the shark and fired a harpoon into its ribs,
immobilising it instantly.
The other two reached out and pulled Ronaldo from the water and, using
long clubs, beat the shark to death.
They bundled the bleeding, semi-conscious Ronaldo into the speedboat
along with the dead shark and prepared for a hasty retreat, when they
heard frantic calling .......
It was the Queen calling them to the yacht.
On reaching the yacht the Queen went into raptures about the rescue and said
to Beckham, Rooney and Gerrard (for it was they) "I will give you a
knighthood for your brave actions. I thought the England team would hate
Ronaldo after the world cup, but I see that my England team are true
heroes and should serve as a model for sportsmanship to other
countries."
She knighted them there and then, and proceeded to sail away.
As she departed Rooney asked the others, "Who was that?!"
"That," Beckham answered, "was our Queen. She rules the Commonwealth and
knows everything about our country."
"Well," Rooney replied, "she definitely knows F*ck-all about shark
fishing.
How's the bait holding up?"
a man in the water off the port bow - clearly being menaced by a very
large shark.
Through her binoculars she could see it was Christian Ronaldo,
struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a 20 foot shark!
The queen ordered the captain to change course to try and save the poor
man, but she knew the yacht's top speed would never get them there in
time.
At that exact moment a speedboat containing three men wearing white
England shirts sped into view.
One of the men took aim at the shark and fired a harpoon into its ribs,
immobilising it instantly.
The other two reached out and pulled Ronaldo from the water and, using
long clubs, beat the shark to death.
They bundled the bleeding, semi-conscious Ronaldo into the speedboat
along with the dead shark and prepared for a hasty retreat, when they
heard frantic calling .......
It was the Queen calling them to the yacht.
On reaching the yacht the Queen went into raptures about the rescue and said
to Beckham, Rooney and Gerrard (for it was they) "I will give you a
knighthood for your brave actions. I thought the England team would hate
Ronaldo after the world cup, but I see that my England team are true
heroes and should serve as a model for sportsmanship to other
countries."
She knighted them there and then, and proceeded to sail away.
As she departed Rooney asked the others, "Who was that?!"
"That," Beckham answered, "was our Queen. She rules the Commonwealth and
knows everything about our country."
"Well," Rooney replied, "she definitely knows F*ck-all about shark
fishing.
How's the bait holding up?"
lol 
