Overdriven
Dumpster Fire of The South
- Joined
- Jan 23, 2004
- Messages
- 12,638
So, in this world of politically correct nursery rhymes.. I thought I'd post these new and improved versions of our childhood stories. (rep to who ever can find the reason I'm posting this 
Mary Had A Little Lamb:
Mary had a dimensionally-challenged-but-no-less-useful-to-society lamb,
Its fleece was as rainbow as snow,
And everywhere that Mary went,
The lamb chose to follow, out of its own free will
not because it felt compelled to by the mores of a patriarchal phallus-centred society that seeks dominance over non-human life forms.
Georgy Porgie
Georgie Porgie, pudding and pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play,
Georgie Porgie was accused of sexual harassment and creating a hostile offensive environment and after a summary tribunal he was taken away.
Jack and Jill
Two young persons of opposite genders, proceeded toward the apex of a natural geologic protuberance. The purpose of their expedition was to procure a sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel, the exact size of which was omniously omitted from the record. As the male person precipitously descended, he consequently sustained severe damage to the upper cranial portion of his anatomy. A similar fate befell the female, who immediately after the male person, performed a self-rotational translation oriented in the same direction having been traversed by the young man.
Baa Baa Black Sheep
ba ba ethnic minority sheep
have you any wool
yes equal person, yes equal person
3 bags full
one for my superior but no less important a person
one for the imperialist scum who has inherited a title
and one for the vertically challenged person of male gender
who lives down the no less an important a road than a motorway
Little Miss Muffet
Physically diminutive (but no less a valuable person) --- (objectionable and archaic term denoting gender and marital status removed) --- (Name based solely upon that of male parent hence perpetuating a patriarchal, phallo-centric, male-dominated society with all the war-mongering rapist implications thereof removed)
Sat on a tuffet...
Others out there.. Found them the best. (There atually proper new politically correct ones around, I preffered those though)
Mary Had A Little Lamb:
Mary had a dimensionally-challenged-but-no-less-useful-to-society lamb,
Its fleece was as rainbow as snow,
And everywhere that Mary went,
The lamb chose to follow, out of its own free will
not because it felt compelled to by the mores of a patriarchal phallus-centred society that seeks dominance over non-human life forms.
Georgy Porgie
Georgie Porgie, pudding and pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play,
Georgie Porgie was accused of sexual harassment and creating a hostile offensive environment and after a summary tribunal he was taken away.
Jack and Jill
Two young persons of opposite genders, proceeded toward the apex of a natural geologic protuberance. The purpose of their expedition was to procure a sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel, the exact size of which was omniously omitted from the record. As the male person precipitously descended, he consequently sustained severe damage to the upper cranial portion of his anatomy. A similar fate befell the female, who immediately after the male person, performed a self-rotational translation oriented in the same direction having been traversed by the young man.
Baa Baa Black Sheep
ba ba ethnic minority sheep
have you any wool
yes equal person, yes equal person
3 bags full
one for my superior but no less important a person
one for the imperialist scum who has inherited a title
and one for the vertically challenged person of male gender
who lives down the no less an important a road than a motorway
Little Miss Muffet
Physically diminutive (but no less a valuable person) --- (objectionable and archaic term denoting gender and marital status removed) --- (Name based solely upon that of male parent hence perpetuating a patriarchal, phallo-centric, male-dominated society with all the war-mongering rapist implications thereof removed)
Sat on a tuffet...
Others out there.. Found them the best. (There atually proper new politically correct ones around, I preffered those though
)
