it's been a while, another breakup thread!!

[old.user4556]

Seriously Trem, you wouldn't. They're all fucked up in the head.

 

[TdC]

there is a difference tbh: I'd like lots of se><or with 19yo ladies. I would *NOT* (no oh please god no) like a relationship with said 19yo ladies.

 

[TdC]

the hard bit ofc, is getting my gf to ok all that se><or. or even join in!

 

[Trem]

the hard bit ofc, is getting my gf to ok all that se><or. or even join in!

Shes up for a threesome don't you worry about that!

 

[old.user4556]

there is a difference tbh: I'd like lots of se><or with 19yo ladies. I would *NOT* (no oh please god no) like a relationship with said 19yo ladies.

That's probably the problem. We spent the first month of our relationship just casually sleeping together, it was great. Then she called it all off mid december because of the lack of commitment. Instead of me saying "yeah ok, fun while it lasted" - we both tried to pursue a relationship.

 

[NikonL]

Why do girls have such a hard time getting over people? If i get over a girl, I can see them a year later and they'll just be "a girl" to me, I won't feel anything special for them other than a sense of familiarlality (sp?).

But it seems that a girl cant get over a guy in a lifetime, they can come back 5/10 years later and all the emotion will come flooding back to her.

Anyway, I feel for you G. I'm in a similar but not identical situation in that my current GF has (had) a guy that was her absolute best friend, and that they were the closest it was possible to get without being in a relationship and in love, until he did three things to her (I'm not saying what they were as it's not my right) that completely fucked her up and changed her forever.

He's "run away" now. And while I don't waste time thinking about it, I don't look forward to the innevitable day he turns up at her door and says "look! I've been all the way to Luton or wherever the hell my bus pass got me, and its changed me as a person, im much better now, forgive me and then break up with your bf and then i can have sex with you and then get bored of you and break your heart again" (I don't think he'll say that last part, but thats the kind of guy he is, you all know the type )

As mature and grown up as she is, I don't think I've met a girl under the age of 25 who had the emotional make up to realise a mistake like that before they make it. But who knows, she could suprise me My rule as always with relationships is to just sit back and enjoy them until something goes horribly wrong, then get out of there and chalk it up to "experiance" so that the same mistakes arent made again

 

[TdC]

My rule as always with relationships is to just sit back and enjoy them until something goes horribly wrong, then get out of there and chalk it up to "experiance" so that the same mistakes arent made again

wise, until you want to go long term. then you have to work out your differences, and if you make a mistake, then you have to try your damnedest to make good the situation.

btw, your avatar. still got the original pic?

 

[old.user4556]

Why do girls have such a hard time getting over people? If i get over a girl, I can see them a year later and they'll just be "a girl" to me, I won't feel anything special for them other than a sense of familiarlality (sp?).

But it seems that a girl cant get over a guy in a lifetime, they can come back 5/10 years later and all the emotion will come flooding back to her.

I know what you mean, I spoke to my 5 year long ex the other day and it was like we were just friends. We got on well, but there was nothing more to it. She was having a shit time with her boyfriend and i helped her to see the right thing to do. She was just ... another girl, didn't feel special at all.

My argument is, that you either want to be with someone, or you don't. She says she's moved on, but i really don't think she has. That's what my gut tells me, she's not moved on at all. Well, maybe she did, but now he's back she's right back where she was. She either wants to be with me, or she doesn't - which is it. Personally, I think she's trying to get over me as quick as possible so she can get back with him without the baggage.

That said, she's still in love with me, why does this other guy want her back if she loves someone else *shrug*.

She's too young, that said this can happen to older couples.

 

[rynnor]

she needed some space to sort herself out

This is the point when you run - sounds heartless but relationships cannot 'fix' someone - if you find out their screwed up at an early stage then get the hell out fast!

Only thing you can do now is move on and forget her - to attempt to 'hang in there' will really fuck you up...

 

[rynnor]

It does make you a little creepy tbh.

I think it depends on the people involved tbh - I've not done it personally but if the people are both similarly mature then theres no problem with it but the opposite also applies regardless of age.

 

[Gamah]

wise, until you want to go long term. then you have to work out your differences, and if you make a mistake, then you have to try your damnedest to make good the situation.

btw, your avatar. still got the original pic?

Yeah long terms are shit.

 

[old.Tohtori]

All realtionships are about speedbumps.

Usually they come in small(which can be easily crossed) and big periodical ones(which really stress out the relationship.

Small ones are just a test if you fit together, the big ones...well...they can break even the sturdiest one.

6 months.
1 year.
5 years.
10 years.

Usually the big ones.

But the basic of things is, things work or don't, people fit or don't, people break up as friends or don't.

My ex is my trusted best friends these days, 100% trust both ways and tell everything. Things just have a way of going as they will.

 

[old.user4556]

Can you even love two people at the same time, in that way?

 

[Trem]

Can you even love two people at the same time, in that way?

Yes.

 

[old.Tohtori]

Yeah, love is a tricky bugger.

If you really love someone, that love will stay lingering in your underpants like a bad case of herpes. You think you're over it, water under the bridge etc, you fall in love with another person, maybe less, maybe more and when you see that old love, each and every single little good aspect of the past relationship comes barrelling down like...barrels on donkey kong.

Nobody ever remembers "Oh i loved that guy/girl, but we didn't go well together."

It's either, "I hate him!" or "Ooh he's so wubely".

 

[old.user4556]

Yes.

Elaborate.

How do you address the situation.

 

[Skyler]

Love is a strange thing, once it happens, the real deal.. it doesn't ever seem to go away. You might find it harmed or changed over time but a bit of it will always stay there and as has already been said, you will still remember parts of that person fondly.. no matter what they do.

 

[Calaen]

Elaborate.

How do you address the situation.

Basically, I have a wife, I love her with my heart and soul. Before my wife going back years ago I was dating my best friend for about 4 years.

She is still one of my closest female friends, I do however hold very strong feelings for her, I honestly thought she was my soul mate, up until I met Marguerite.

So there is my take on it I am IN love with my wife but I also have a little bit of love for my ex and I still care about her alot.

The hardest thing which I found at the start was drawing a big line which I would never get close to crossing, it took some doing but I benefitted the most from having both of these women in my life however few times I do see my ex it is nice to know everyone can get on knowing that we have both moved on.

 

[MYstIC G]

Not read whole thread, but seems she's playing A against B so she can escape you both?

 

[Trem]

Elaborate.

How do you address the situation.

As I said in another thread I don't believe in love for people who aren't blood, if that makes sense. Even then I am sure I only truly love my son, he is the only person I could not live without. Me and Samm split up about 3 years ago, I didn't stop breathing, it didn't kill me, yes I was fucked up but I lived.

So in my opinion you can love 2 people the same, it all depends on what you call love. Theres love and then theres jealousy, the 2 are hard to split up.

All of the above is Trem thoughts and my feelings and thoughts alone.

Its a stupid life and I try to figure stuff out the best I can.

 

[TdC]

Its a stupid life and I try to figure stuff out the best I can.

ditto. it's hard sometimes though.

 

[MYstIC G]

From what I've heard, more often than not it's soft!

 

[TdC]

it is now tbh, as I fell yesterday mountainbiking and I think I cracked a rib. when I hurt, se>< is far from my mind

 

[Will]

Lightweight. You aren't a man till you've broken several ribs.

 

[Ch3tan]

You could always capitalise on the oppurtunity, have the ribs removed, the pain will go and you can stop moaning about your missus not giving you head.

 

[tris-]

with them removed, you could also practice auto fellatio for when the bitch isnt up for it.

(or is that what chetan is trying to say anyway?)

 

[Ch3tan]

Yes, with slightly more subtlelty than you tris-

 

[tris-]

Yes, with slightly more subtlelty than you tris-

its beating around the bush that causes such confusions, blunt or not at all

 

[TdC]

*twats tris-*

 

[Tom]

Oh noes