Damini
Part of the furniture
- Joined
- Dec 22, 2003
- Messages
- 2,234
When I was in Greece, my friend and I stopped off at a five star hotel and spa for a massage. My friend went first - she came out with a strange expression on her face. I whispered "how was it?" and she responded "It's a bit... pokey."
This turns out to be the understatement of a life time. This young, disinterested looking massuer instructs me to lie down, and then I swear it feels like she massages me with the corner of a desk. I have never known discomfort like it. Honestly, it felt like being beaten to death with a bag full of elbows. I even started laughing at one stage, because it hurt so much, and all I could hear was my friend's sad little understatement... "It's a bit... pokey."
(She was also fixated with my arse, and massaged the hell out of it. I found that a little... scary. I was wearing tankini bottoms, and she just ripped them down, and pummelled my bum. I was worried she would try to give me a very unhappy happy ending. I have never been less releaxed in my life.)
We were supposed to be having a facial at the same spa the next day, but we decided to run away, in case she did it with a brillo pad and a brick.
So, the next day we got to a different spa, and I have a head and shoulder massage, hoping to undo what horrors had been done. What can I say? It rained for five days in a row when we were out there. Anyway, as this second massage happened, I can feel all the bruises under my skin from the day before. Worse than that, I can hear *popping*. Like bubble wrap. You know how when someone touches you, and feels something odd, and keeps circling that location, prodding, trying to work it out like its written in brail there? Well, thats what this massage was like.
Afterwards, as me and my friend leave, we explain the massage we had yesterday, and these people at this spa laugh, and explain how we were both wincing through the massage and our backs felt all wrong (this conveyed through broken english). Joy.
Anyway, weeks later, my back still feels rubbish. So much for a "theraputic" massage. Things click now that never used to.
Do you think there is anything that can be done to undo a massage that felt like a car crash? Do you think it's just a case of a few months down the line everything will feel normal again, or should I just suck it up and say thats what happens when you pay for a massage in a place you just decide to go into on a whim, or what?
This turns out to be the understatement of a life time. This young, disinterested looking massuer instructs me to lie down, and then I swear it feels like she massages me with the corner of a desk. I have never known discomfort like it. Honestly, it felt like being beaten to death with a bag full of elbows. I even started laughing at one stage, because it hurt so much, and all I could hear was my friend's sad little understatement... "It's a bit... pokey."
(She was also fixated with my arse, and massaged the hell out of it. I found that a little... scary. I was wearing tankini bottoms, and she just ripped them down, and pummelled my bum. I was worried she would try to give me a very unhappy happy ending. I have never been less releaxed in my life.)
We were supposed to be having a facial at the same spa the next day, but we decided to run away, in case she did it with a brillo pad and a brick.
So, the next day we got to a different spa, and I have a head and shoulder massage, hoping to undo what horrors had been done. What can I say? It rained for five days in a row when we were out there. Anyway, as this second massage happened, I can feel all the bruises under my skin from the day before. Worse than that, I can hear *popping*. Like bubble wrap. You know how when someone touches you, and feels something odd, and keeps circling that location, prodding, trying to work it out like its written in brail there? Well, thats what this massage was like.
Afterwards, as me and my friend leave, we explain the massage we had yesterday, and these people at this spa laugh, and explain how we were both wincing through the massage and our backs felt all wrong (this conveyed through broken english). Joy.
Anyway, weeks later, my back still feels rubbish. So much for a "theraputic" massage. Things click now that never used to.
Do you think there is anything that can be done to undo a massage that felt like a car crash? Do you think it's just a case of a few months down the line everything will feel normal again, or should I just suck it up and say thats what happens when you pay for a massage in a place you just decide to go into on a whim, or what?
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