Internet lies.. what are our rights as an average Joe?

['Shy]

What rights do we have, as ordinary human beings when someone publicly tells lies about us? As a celebrity, you have the money to "sue their asses off" and demand a public apology, but 9 times out of 10 it's done for the publicity in the first place, so who cares?

Hmm, I've thought long and hard on how to post this as plainly and simply as possible but I cannot think of the right words without getting very angry.

To be specific, my ex husband has written a mass of bullshit, speculations, implications, lies, whatever you want to call it, about me, my life, our life when we were married, even our sex life, on his website. Friends say ignore it, and your real friends know the truth, don't read his website, blah blah, but this really fucking hurts. To think, all our mutual friends we had have turned against me and think these things of me, because of all this shit he's told them about me, not to mention publicly posted on the fucking world wide web.

Now, the only comeback I have is a copy of his signatures on the divorce petition stating that he agrees to all the paragraphs of my reasons for divorce, that they are true, and that he does not contest them. In other words, yes, he admitted defeat and let me divorce him because he couldn't deny the reasons behind the divorce, but will not let anyone else see that.

So in my mind, it still fucking hurts. Yes I know the truth, but there's hundreds of people out there who have read what he wrote about me and feel sorry for the poor little man, give him support, hate me, even though I never met them.

Sorry for the rant. What I'm trying to say is - does anyone know if - legally - anything can be done to make him remove this crap from his website? My solicitor who is handling the divorce case says speak to the police. Well, excuse me, but a fat lot of good they will do? This isn't domestic violence, it's mental torture for one.

Anyways, thanks for listening, and if anyone has any advice I'd be most grateful.

 

[Catsby]

Catsby believes what you are saying amounts to libel.
Catsby doubts asking the owner will help, so ask your lawyer to issue a first demand (cease and desist type order) to both him, and more importantly, his webhost.

In the past, Catsby has seen that Webhosts will often just suspend the site to avoid them getting into legal problems, unless they are getting alot of money from the site.

 

[throdgrain]

Link !

 

[Tom]

Libel sounds right, although I never did understand the distinction between it and slander. Be warned though, you cannot recover your costs from a successful libel case.

 

[Tom]

BTW, set up your own website dictating exactly what happened from your point of view, with copies of legal documents and anything else you have to back it all up.

Then make sure enough people link from his site to yours.

 

['Shy]

BTW, set up your own website dictating exactly what happened from your point of view, with copies of legal documents and anything else you have to back it all up.

Then make sure enough people link from his site to yours.

Very very tempting believe me, and I could easily post a link in his guestbook.

Hmmm, but isn't that just being as bad as him?

 

[Stimpy]

It would probably be cheaper to have him kneecapped than it would to take him to court. Alternatively I'm sure there are some people here who could hack his website and you could replace his frontpage with a picture of him naked if you have one and if you don't one could be doctored to include sheep and other farm animals, the possibilties are endless.

 

[fatbusinessman]

Libel sounds right, although I never did understand the distinction between it and slander.

Slander is spoken. Libel is printed.

That simple

 

[fatbusinessman]

Alternatively I'm sure there are some people here who could hack his website and you could replace his frontpage with a picture of him naked if you have one

Although then he could sue you under the Computer Misuse Act of 1990, carrying a maximum penalty of 5 years in jail.

So not recommended.

 

[Stimpy]

Although then he could sue you under the Computer Misuse Act of 1990, carrying a maximum penalty of 5 years in jail.

So not recommended.

Well I meant someone good at it

 

[Damini]

Is it some crappy Tripod job? Is so, just write to them directly and say how outraged you are, and how you'd rather approach them directly before taking the legal route. It could work.

Don't sink to his level. Use this website as a reminder of what you're so lucky to be free from. If he wants to write that you smell of wee on the school toilet walls, then that reflects badly on him at the end of the day.

 

['Shy]

Is it some crappy Tripod job? Is so, just write to them directly and say how outraged you are, and how you'd rather approach them directly before taking the legal route. It could work.

Don't sink to his level. Use this website as a reminder of what you're so lucky to be free from. If he wants to write that you smell of wee on the school toilet walls, then that reflects badly on him at the end of the day.

Hehe, a bit more complicated than that, Damini, altho nice interpretation

His main website is a mix of music and film reviews, bad poetry and general rantings about politics and British rail, etc. He also links off there a Blog, with which I have already logged a complaint, but no response as yet.

So it's not exactly an entire website dedicated to me so much, as his own personal website he's had for many years, he's established a name within a certain community for what he does, and he's now taken to telling the world all about what a horrible wife I was.

 

['Shy]

It would probably be cheaper to have him kneecapped than it would to take him to court. Alternatively I'm sure there are some people here who could hack his website and you could replace his frontpage with a picture of him naked if you have one and if you don't one could be doctored to include sheep and other farm animals, the possibilties are endless.

This made me smile If only life was that simple!




*disclaimer: Please do not pm me if you can do this.





*remove the word "not" from that last sentence.










*for the mods: this is a joke.

 

[Driwen]

[QUOTE='Shy]Very very tempting believe me, and I could easily post a link in his guestbook.

Hmmm, but isn't that just being as bad as him?[/QUOTE]

if you just tell your story and with the reason why you post it(meaning link to his webbie) and posting a link on his website isnt being as bad as him. As he started it and he gave you no chance to defend yourself, while you do (due to the link).

Thing is im not sure this will solve much as it will probably will end up in a mudslinging contest and Im not sure if anyone can win such a contest. Basically if the friends you lost are to dumb to know that mudslinging happens after a divorce and dont go to you for your side of the story, maybe its better that you lost them.

 

[Tom]

[QUOTE='Shy]Very very tempting believe me, and I could easily post a link in his guestbook.

Hmmm, but isn't that just being as bad as him?[/QUOTE]

Well, for all I know you could be a liar, and he could be right, but lets assume you're not. He is lying, and has no real evidence to back it up. You do, and can set the record straight.

Sounds more than fair to me. Although personally, I'd just go round and brick his windows. Easier, and more annoying.

 

[Danyan]

I'd suggest talking to a solicitor if it bothers you a lot (i.e. enough to spend cash on it). You may not actually have to take him to court, just the threat of legal action can be enough sometimes.
If it is untrue and you can prove that it has caused defamation of character, then you should be able to sue for libel.

 

[Cyfr]

Hacking the website seems a good idea! Then give us the link, I want to see nekkid pictures

 

[Danyan]

This website might be useful. Note that under UK law you can also sue his web space provider for libel (assuming they are UK based). Simply informing them of your intention will often be enough to have the content removed.

 

[SilverHood]

This website might be useful. Note that under UK law you can also sue his web space provider for libel (assuming they are UK based). Simply informing them of your intention will often be enough to have the content removed.

In theory you can sue them, but it doesn't work that way.

Just do a WHOIS lookup on the domain it's hosted on (www.dnsstuff.com), and contact the admin contact.

Sometimes hosts would love to take a site or page offline, but can't due to contractual agreements - a court order is the only way.

While working for a hosting company over easter, I actually remember a teacher who complained that her ex had written nasty stuff on his website a few months back, and she wanted it removed because she was scared that her pupils our colleages might find out.
The site wasn't hosted directly by us, so we couldn't touch it. Told her to go to the police and report it as harrasment - if the police told us to shut the website down, we could, without getting into a legal mess.

 

[caLLous]

Defamation of character innit?

 

[Gog]

Write to whoever hosts the website informing them that it contains defamatory remarks about yourself. Ask them to investigate and consider removing the appropriate pages.

The leading case in the UK for defamation on the internet is Godfrey vs Demon. The court ruled that Demon were liable for defamatory remarks hosted by them on a newsgroup, as the plaintiff had notified them previously of the remarks and had asked for them to be removed. Most hosts/ISPs are well aware of this case and will action most requests for removal.

If that fails to work, or if the host is outside the UK, then you would be best getting professional legal advice. UK law is very complicated when it comes to defamation (for example the wording could be construed as merely insulting, which is not the same as defamtory).

 

[ArrrImmaPir8!]

You'd be better off ignoring it. If you do go down a legal route you're not even likely to win since personal stuff is incredibly contentious and difficult to prove. You've not suffered any loss of earnings as a result so you'd not get any compensation.

Write to whoever hosts it whinging and you might get lucky.

 

[Paradroid]

[QUOTE='Shy]Very very tempting believe me, and I could easily post a link in his guestbook.

Hmmm, but isn't that just being as bad as him?[/QUOTE]


Very hard to judge without any facts. Are you 100% sure that he knows you know about his site?

I would take the direct route, be a man ffs!
(....sorry.)


Phone him and demand an immediate retraction, and, an html apology!
If he acts like a c*nt, then...

/Bunny-Boiler
Phone his work and leave the same message with his bosses (the more the merrier).
If he has no one you can use for leverage (including the social if he's not working), repeat same message to said "friends" - describe his behaviour as "you're worried about him" & "matter of fact like" (you've moved on....he hasn't).
Bunny-Boiler/

I'd advise threatening the above first, but if he really does act like a c*nt (and continues to after the threat), be prepared to act....or his next update on his site could be "The Psycho-Hose-Beast Diary".






.....OR.....

Phone him up and give him the ultimatum "if you don't get rid of that webpage, I'm never having sex with you again!". The beauty of this is obvious, you never intended to ever have sex with him again, but by saying that he will think there's still a chance of something (casual), and treat you better.

Or, if you really despise each other, hint that your tasty mate fancied "moving-in" to your old spot, but you're definately going to dissuade her now!

It's genius.

And, as far as notifying the webhost, lawyers etc, yeah, maybe that's what's needed, but, I bet if you contacted all the websites connected to his, fellow bloggers etc - you would get better results from "X"....peer pressure an 'ol that.

 

[~Yuckfou~]

Link !

Absolkinfreakinlutely!! fs.

Secondly, asl?

Thirdly, ignore his rantings, who gives a fuck what he thinks?
You are happy, I guess, so live your life happy not bitter.
(been there done that, long time ago) (long long time )

 

[Driwen]

Phone him up and give him the ultimatum "if you don't get rid of that webpage, I'm never having sex with you again!". The beauty of this is obvious, you never intended to ever have sex with him again, but by saying that he will think there's still a chance of something (casual), and treat you better.

Or, if you really despise each other, hint that your tasty mate fancied "moving-in" to your old spot, but you're definately going to dissuade her now!

after a divorce and shhy (who is a she ) now living with a new bf I dont think her ex husband would believe the never having sex card. And after a divorce all the property is legally divided, so the second card will most likely not work (or shhy even owns the old spot, dunno).

 

['Shy]

Yes, (thanks Driwen), note the ex bit in my post I've not spoken to him for nearly two years now, and frankly never ever want to again.

He's written in his blog he suspects I read his site, of course he can't be certain because we don't speak, but occasionally he'll say something to the effect of "I know my wife reads this, sad bitch", etc. So yes, I'm pretty confident he says certain things to irritate me. I only ever got angry and responded once with a comment in his guestbook after he'd written some weird poem about me, and he responded by laughing, calling me the sad one, and deleting my comment and saying it's not big or clever.

Regarding the comment someone said about see a lawyer, well I already said I've done that and they said go to the police. I don't believe the police will actually do anything because we're not even married any more, and they don't have power over things like this.

The best advice I've seen is finding his web provider, and I'm going to do that now. Still waiting for a reply from Blogger, I'll give that another couple of days seeing as it's the weekend.

Thanks for all your comments

 

[Wij]

Good Luck

 

[Tom]

Tell us where he lives, and we'll go down and 'sort him out'. Manchester style.

 

[Danyan]

Tell us where he lives, and we'll go down and 'sort him out'. Manchester style.

Yeah!

 

[SawTooTH]

Stop reading his site. Get on with your life. All a legal battle will do is cost you money and in the end these things can rarely be won due to this being opinion.
Those that care for you should follow suit. Those of a like mind with him are probably not worth knowing.

Any more contact with him either directly or through lawers is in mu opinion playing his game and handing him the POWER. He still can get to you and affect you.

By ignoring him and above all else being happy in yourself you have beaten him.

He sounds very sad