im under heavy attack!

[tris-]

it was bad enough that 50 odd kids have set a massive fire going about 20 ft from my house.

now they are launching fireworks in every direction. some of the embers are landing in my garden and on the roof.

im tempted to call the police before my house burns down but they probably wouldnt arrive till next week

 

[nath]

Kitchen knife/baseball bat and lots of screaming.

Job done.

 

[Ch3tan]

He runs the risk of them shoving a rocket up his arse though.

 

[nath]

Yeah but if you're waving a blade about you're bound to make at least one of them bleed - ergo: worth it.

 

[Maljonic]

You could wear a tin helmet and sit of the roof with a bucket of water, and a bucket of sand, a la WW2 firewatch duty.

 

[Tilda]

get a BB gun

 

[Sharma]

get a BB gun

Air rifle, knock rocket pipe enough till it shoots chav in the face.

RESULT.

 

[Alan]

it was bad enough that 50 odd kids have set a massive fire going about 20 ft from my house.

now they are launching fireworks in every direction. some of the embers are landing in my garden and on the roof.

im tempted to call the police before my house burns down but they probably wouldnt arrive till next week

If you feel you need to call the police then do it, its what they are there for and you pay your taxes. Keep it anonymous if you would rather - the fact that fireworks are being misused would get them out.

 

[Chilly]

Dont be such a twat. The police arnt going to come out to tell some kids off for letting fireworks off on fireworks night unless you're some old biddy. You may well pay your taxes, but it doesnt mean you get a decent service for your money.

 

[mank!]

throw some bricks at them and shout obscenities in a semi-coherent manner.

 

[Tom]

Just say that the kids were waving Golliwogs around, and shouting 'DOWN WITH PIKIES'.

You'll have an entire division turn up.