I'm soooo bored

[Testin da Cable]

In one day I start at my new job, and I have delegated every possible task I perform to those who remain behind. All projects have been informed that I am no longer participating and that so-and-so is my replacement.

The net result of the above is that I now have nothing to do. Playing server-room-tennis is only fun for about half a day or so and I've already been to lunch so that's nixed too. Tasks I've scheduled for myself this afternoon are zip_my_homedir_and_mail_it_to_myself_cos_its_deffo_going_to_be_trashed() and figure_out_what_to_do_with_my_mail_archives(). I've moved shop before so I'm well aware that my future workstation will either work -but be a p133/48 or will be a pIV2.4/512 and not work at all [and be replaced by aforementioned p133]. My security settings will deffo all be skrewed to heck and all the firewalls will hate me. The firewall admins will refuse to re-set my settings because I'll suddenly be in a different department from what they were used to.

ho hum. I think I'll go for a wee walk

 

[Will]

Play tennis against that server-room window.

 

[Testin da Cable]

well, I played against a low-level tech and he beat the heck out of me 6-3 6-2.

 

[Will]

Sack him.

I'd just sneak off to the pub if I were you. It's traditional, is it not?

 

[Testin da Cable]

no, no it's good when they beat 'da man'. better than letting me win heh.

 

[dysfunction]

Dont you feel a bit ill? I'm sure you must be getting a migrane or something...you best go home and have a few beers!

 

[Wij]

u need high quality porn and a box of kleenex double velvet my friend

 

[Testin da Cable]

oh god and the new girl for a few floors down....*COUGH*


no of course not Wij, how dare j00!

 

[Mellow-]

You got beaten by a girl eh?

 

[Testin da Cable]

er no....but trust me, she may uh, beat me any time

 

[Furr]

you'd want to be beaten by a girl ?, wouldnt that like hurt ?,
unless.....



oooooh

 

[Testin da Cable]

yes

 

[Wij]

I'm too naive !

 

[Testin da Cable]

yes





















you dirty boy

 

[Summo]

Fill your spinky server room half-full with those little plastic balls and spend the rest of the day jumping off the server cabinets and laughing like a small boy.

Wonderful...

 

[Testin da Cable]

I expect that should cause some unexpected reactions I'll wait till I start at the n00 place though: they don't have server-rooms...they have server-floors! Several in fact.
I wonder if the resident techs would like a rousing game of server-floor-rugby?

 

[Wilier]

So, your in the new position then. Hows it goin thus far????

 

[Testin da Cable]

no, that's tomorrow. yesterday was my last real operational day, today is for cleaning out the old desk, turning in my dect, cryptocards and other kit that has wound up in my keeping over the years. plan on going home around 15:00.

 

[Wij]

GIVE ME YOUR PORN !!!

 

[Testin da Cable]

I have none for you mate

















but wait! a quick scan through the homedir servers will usually yield a few gigs worth...

ME: there's pr0n and other shite in the user-servers
DA MAN: you're not allowed to go through user's homedirs! privacy and all that old bean.
ME: it will cost 210000 euros to upgrade all the user-servers with new drives.
DA MAN: you're not allowed to go through....WHAT?!?!
DA MAN: err ok...we want a detailed report telling us exactly where all the goodie*cough* smut is, but you're not to remove it. Understand?
ME: are you mad?
DA MAN: run along now there's a good chap. chop-chop with that report now!

 

[Will]

I want to be Da Man. It sounds pretty easy.

 

[Testin da Cable]

well, 'da man' is usually a group of managers. the group, on average, consists of exactly one technically literate person(TM), two or three weak-minded fools and about five hardcore corporate politico's(TM). This ensures that either [worst] things don't go the way you 'd like(TM) or [best] you get the smelly end of a compromise(TM).
the trick is that you have to do as much as you can before the TLP gets killed off by the HCP's.











the above is a joke though..........*sob*

 

[old.Kez]

I bet you work for Chello, don't you? :\

 

[Testin da Cable]

AHAHAAHAHAahahacunt


you hurt me Kez. even I still have some standards

 

[PR.]

sooooo you work for AOL?

 

[Testin da Cable]

NNNNNGGGGGGGHHHH!!!

 

[Wilier]

So, today must be the day.

Good luck TeeDee.

 

[Testin da Cable]

arrrgh! nothing works



thanks wilier

 

[Wilier]

Would you like me to come round and

"'it it wiv me 'ammer??" [/rough mechy speak]

 

[PR.]

*closes real version of Uplink after a successful night of 'optimizing' TdC's new servers*