I just killed a man...

[DocWolfe]

Whats the best way to dispose of the body?

Discuss.

 

[Laddey]

Feed him to the pigs.

or

Go Hanibal Lector on his ass.

or

Necrophilia and cremate(sp) his sorry ass!

 

[cHodAX]

Wait until your housemate is asleep, go into his room and put some blood of the victim on him. Wipe your prints off the murder weapon, somehow put the murder weapon in his hand for fingerprints and then hide it under his bed.

After that call the police and say you just found a dead body and found a trail of blood into your housemates bedroom. When the police arrive tell them Pete did it and you are off scottfree!


Oh unless it was Pete that you murdered in whichcase you can expect to be repeatedly bumraped for the next 20 years in Wormwood Scrubs!

 

[Shagrat]

Get him into your car with a wire coat hanger up his sleeve then you can drive around pretending he is waving at people before going to a beach party where a series of hilarious events involving people stumbling across the dead body is bound to happen before you escape, scot-free, in some completely implausible manner.

 

[Ned]

Get him into your car with a wire coat hanger up his sleeve then you can drive around pretending he is waving at people before going to a beach party where a series of hilarious events involving people stumbling across the dead body is bound to happen before you escape, scot-free, in some completely implausible manner.

ROFL irl

logged on to rep you :england:

 

[Jeros]

The same was i heard about some guy on the net who found a dead fox on the road

he took it home and had sex with it then ate it

 

[Basic_X]

Go Mafia on him, put his fet into a concrete bath and dump him at sea

 

[Minidk]

eat him

 

[echome]

Turn your self in... Crime does not pay!!!


BULLCRAP!!! haha

 

[CorNokZ]

First let pigs eat him, and then take what's left of the corpse and put it into a concrete mixer and treat yourself with a new floor or something

 

[preacherboy]

Shove him up your Fat ass

 

[DocWolfe]

I was thinking more along the lines of cutting up the body into small chunks, filling the bath with caustic soda, slowly adding the chunks and stirring until it becomes a thin solution.

And then I pull the plug. I'm open to suggestion though.

 

[fl3a]

cut into small chunks.
throw into a very hot fire.
burn it some more.
dont throw the ashes all in one place.

 

[Ctuchik]

I was thinking more along the lines of cutting up the body into small chunks, filling the bath with caustic soda, slowly adding the chunks and stirring until it becomes a thin solution.

not working aparently. caustic soda cant completly dissolve meat. and certainly no the bones.
saw that on Mythbusters. or was that another acid they used?

 

[Wonk]

why do you want to dispose the body? cut off his arms and legs, and make a table out of him.

 

[DocWolfe]

why do you want to dispose the body? cut off his arms and legs, and make a table out of him.

ingenious!

 

[preacherboy]

ingenious!

Yes I think he has got him coverd

 

[crispy]

Whats the best way to dispose of the body?

Discuss.

Who says dispose? I say bring your new friend to a taxidermist and you'll have a nice lifelike statue in your own home!

 

[haarewin]

why do you want to dispose the body? cut off his arms and legs, and make a table out of him.

i dont know if anyone has ever flicked through one of those 'mums' magazines, where they have 'great tips' from the readers on how to save a few £ and what to do with leftovers and whatnot. i can see the comments the week after this suggestion already:

"wow, a great tip for all these dead bodies i have laying about. thanks!"

"excellent, now i won't be wasting the children i brutalise weekly! i've already made a nesting of 3!"




my suggestion, drip candle wax all over it and pretend you had a waxwork made.

 

[Calaen]

Mealworms.

 

[Cerb]

as bricktop would advise - You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together.
Sol: Would someone mind telling me, who are you?
Brick Top: And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".

 

[Svartmetall]

Put the body in a bathtub full of quicklime, wait till it's all liquidised - averaging at 5 days for a 200-pound man to completely liquify all skeletal components including marrow - then let it wash away. Remember to fill the bathtub with water and empty it about 20 times afterwards so the PH balance in your drains neutralises, or else it's too easy to see that a chemical agent has been used in large amounts. If you have a water meter you may need to manually reset it so it's not obvious that an unusually large amount of water has been used in a short period of time.

 

[pikeh]

as bricktop would advise - You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together.
Sol: Would someone mind telling me, who are you?
Brick Top: And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".

*sigh*

it was only a matter of time really wasnt it?

 

[soze]

Get a small boat and sail to france. Leave the body on a french beach sail home and relax. When they find it they think drugs cartel killing in french warters the last person they suspect is you!

 

[Heta]

*sigh*

it was only a matter of time really wasnt it?

yes it was

was the first thing I thought about my self, but as I was too lazy last night to find the quote it didnt't become the second post in the thread atleast

 

[Nate]

YouTube - Snatch - Brick Top: Feed them to pigs
[youtubevid]kBvCPTK1MmY[/youtubevid]

I like pigs.

 

[Amildin]

who needs to dispose?

give it to someone for xmas, their problem then...

 

[fettoken]

Anyone who have seen Pusher 3 knows how to dispose of a body...

 

[Huntingtons]

that is so fucking sick in pusher3

(people who said it was bad i dont understand i absolutly loved it - much better than the 2nd)

 

[Bahumat]

Activate a WoW account and sit him infront of the pc. Call the cops saying he's been on there for 2 weeks without eating.