I have

[Laddey]

A big, massive, fuck off beer belly. And it's only come in the last 3 months.

Seriously now, it doesn't suit me. I have a decent athletic build, toned not to fat not to skinny but my belly is absolutly hanging. God, its such an off put. I don't like sitting down because i have big tyres. Like, 5 of them.

It is really big, i'd post a picture but i'd get banned.

What's a good way of getting rid of my beer belly? I don't wanna be no muscle man with a 24 pack. I just dont want this big thing hanging off my body.

If i done say...100sit ups a night would it actually tone up abit and 'lose' abit of it's bulky-ness ? I dont want to lose weight so jogging would be out of the window.

All the stop drinking beer, stop eating shit posts will fail automatically because all my friends eat shit, drink shit, shit shit and they don't have half the gut i do and i dont want to stop drinking and eating KFC's because i have a gut. All due to metabolism and all that lark yeah, but surely i can get rid of it by sit ups and other home excercises?

 

[Uara]

ok. how about cutting down the amount of beer you drink. Its not stopping it completely!

 

[Laddey]

ok. how about cutting down the amount of beer you drink. Its not stopping it completely!

I canny do it cap'n.

I dont understand how one cuts down on drinking ale. I mean, you go out and get pissed - You drink how ever much its gonna take to get you pissed and to have a good night. You know what i mean man?

Just imagine going out and drinking a pint an hour, or a bottle of BLACKBERRY cider per hour. It's like....


no...

just no...

 

[Ashala]

if you want an advice you need to first look at yourself, can you actually change, you say that you wont wonna hear "stop drink beers, stop doing this, stop doing that" so before we can do anything for your body , i think you need to post our your weekly routine so the people who are willing to help you can get an insight on how to actually help you

but basicly you need to have an basic understanding on how calories / fat builds up in your body and that you cant just eat crisps all day long and stay healthy =)

so post away and ill help out as good as i can!

ps im a big fan of beers myself!

 

[Ashala]

and honestly im only cooping by doing workouts in the local gym

 

[adoNix]

wear a corsett!

 

[Bugz]

Laddey you're a stupid fuck!

I don't actually have anything to contribute mind you; I just needed to get that off my chest! :d

 

[Laddey]

Ok

Monday - Wake up at 8am, go down for toast (maybe with cheese) and a brew.

1pm - Have 4 Ham, lettuce, cheese spread sandwiches. 3 packs of walkers crisps (smokey bacon, steak and onion, salt and vinegary), a can of dr pepper.

6:30 - A good tea, with plenty of meat and vegetables

10pm possibly another snack.


Repeat til friday, where i do the exact same but then go out and drink roughly 12 pints, a couple (4-6ish) bottles of WKD (Laugh if you must)

Saturday, wake up around 10am. Have a slap up fry up, go to Greyfriars and start on the session again then around 3ish i'll have a gourmet burger with chips (you also get a beer free with it, it's £6.20. Try it!)

Sunday i chill, i eat breakfast (fry up usually) then wait til tea which is always a sunday roast.

I don't do any exercise. The most i do is probably waiting for the bus or running to the bus stop if im late.

 

[Ashala]

Monday - Wake up at 8am, go down for toast (maybe with cheese) and a brew.

if i understand it correctly you have a beer and white bread with cheese very early in the morning.

first of all, DONT drink beer in the morning, if this is a custom for you, you really need to get rid of that habit, and for the bread and cheese, try some müsli or oatmeal, its alot better and an easy change for less fat / calories.

1pm - Have 4 Ham, lettuce, cheese spread sandwiches. 3 packs of walkers crisps (smokey bacon, steak and onion, salt and vinegary), a can of dr pepper.

TRY to drop the soda and maybe switch it out with a cup of tea?, crisps are really a heavy waight argument when it comes to stuff you need to cut down on, sure its fine to have a bag of crisps once in a while when you go down to the pub and have a few pint but DONT overreact!, if your used to have a few bags, cut down and say 1 bag then, thats a start.

6:30 - A good tea, with plenty of meat and vegetables

seems fine, but if you wonna cut down on some extra calories, try a wee bit more vegatables and a wee less meat, just a little, a little dosent hurt!

10pm possibly another snack.

i know its hard to cut down on the snacks, i really do, but instead of removing them completely, try to eat less of them, as i mentioned instead of 3 bags of crisps try 1, then basicly just eat less snacks =)

Repeat til friday, where i do the exact same but then go out and drink roughly 12 pints, a couple (4-6ish) bottles of WKD (Laugh if you must)

in my eyes weekends, and especially fridays has always been sacret and "not up for a debate" when it comes to what you should eat so here i say, go nuts, just do what you usually do, BUT ONLY if you have dont a good job on cutting down on the ugly stuff during the week[/quote]

Saturday, wake up around 10am. Have a slap up fry up, go to Greyfriars and start on the session again then around 3ish i'll have a gourmet burger with chips (you also get a beer free with it, it's £6.20. Try it!)

Sunday i chill, i eat breakfast (fry up usually) then wait til tea which is always a sunday roast.

again weekends are sacret so dont bother that much, but it sounds like you need to cut down on your fried food, thats a really bad habit and can save you alot of extra beers in the end.





in the end, its just a matter of getting use to new routines, if you just have the guts to try out something new for a few weeks you WILL eventually be able to get use to it and maybe not like it, but atleast undetsand that its healthy for you and that way around, be able to change your health cycle....hopefully!

good luck!

 

[Ezteq]

i heard vodka and diet tonic is a good way to drink alcomahol without the calories, personally i don't know as havn't tried. Beer is very bloating though (tis why its called a beer gut tbh) and from the look of it you could cut down the ammount of bread you eat because thats good for bulking you up in a fatty blobby wobbly way.

however laddey old son, your attitude of "aargh help i need to lose this fat but am not changing dietry habbits or exercising!" is not going to help you, if you could sit there eating chips and will the fat away there would be no fat people in this world (except for those too lazy to will while eating). However, a good tip for losing excess fat is to flip your meals so you have a dinner sized breakfast and a small breakfast sized dinner (that way your not going to bed on a full tum.

or... you could buy one of those electronic pulse toning belts, it might not help you lose the weight but if you tighten it enough and wear it all the time it might hold your gut in lol

 

[Lamp]

Beer makes you fat

Cut down the amount of beer you drink and get a little exercise every day

 

[Mey]

I need to stop drinking cider Vodka and tonic just doesn't look right in my cider mug of awesomeness!

 

[Huntingtons]

bigsoz ez, vodka is 40%, and alcohol has 38 calories/gram. sugar has roughly 16/gram protein 17 or 15/gram (cant remember) and fat 34/gram or something*

You need to cut down on alot of things.
Crisps every day? no good for ze belly.
start eating oat meal for breakfast or rybread!


*DISCALIMER:
these numbers are what i learned in biology and may or may not be accurate since my memory works worse than laddeys dads semen (and as you can see, it worked pretty fucking poorly)

 

[Billargh]

if i understand it correctly you have a beer and white bread with cheese very early in the morning.

I think by brew he means a cup of tea Ash

 

[- English -]

i had a beer belly over summer but its pretty much gone now since ive been going the gym / swimming / 2mile walk to uni + 2 mile back

 

[Ashala]

I think by brew he means a cup of tea Ash

yeah i guess, would seem abit over the top to start out with a pint in the mooning

 

[old.Tohtori]

I'm no nutritionist, or care for that sort of thing, but i am tuned into the great grapewine and it speaks so;

Beer belly comes via summer to store fat for the winter.

Beer belly is sexy these days, unless it's a tanker.

 

[Ezteq]

bigsoz ez, vodka is 40%, and alcohol has 38 calories/gram. sugar has roughly 16/gram protein 17 or 15/gram (cant remember) and fat 34/gram or something*

You need to cut down on alot of things.
Crisps every day? no good for ze belly.
start eating oat meal for breakfast or rybread!


*DISCALIMER:
these numbers are what i learned in biology and may or may not be accurate since my memory works worse than laddeys dads semen (and as you can see, it worked pretty fucking poorly)

lol thats ok it wasn't my information, i just read it in a magazine with some celeb saying how she replaced beer for vodka tonic (I can't stand vodka myself so wouldn't know).

this is what you get for using information spewed out by a celebrity, be warned!!

 

[Laddey]

Can't i just do hundreds of situps a night? Get myself a 6 pack. I currently have a pack, its more like a 1 pack though, but let me tell you! It's well paid for.

 

[Uara]

sit ups just tone I believe, it wont help the beer belly (at least i dont think it will)

 

[Himse]

whoever said dont drink beer in the morning

by brew he meant TEA

lol

 

[Ingafgrinn Macabre]

It's very simple.
To explain in an Excel formula:

=IF(Calories in > Calories out;"Beerbelly";"No beerbelly")

So, you either have to limit your intake, or make sure you burn more, so get your arse off that couch and start working out, or stop (limit) drinking beer and eating chips. Probably both is necessary.

 

[Azurus]

Situps will give you a 6 pack yes but they wont burn the fat which covers your abdominal muscles. (beer belly)

Just start doing abit of cardio. You will lose fat before muscle so you wont become uber skinny.

 

[Laddey]

Situps will give you a 6 pack yes but they wont burn the fat which covers your abdominal muscles. (beer belly)

Just start doing abit of cardio. You will lose fat before muscle so you wont become uber skinny.

I dont fancy losing weight anywhere else though tbh. Just my belly.

 

[Uara]

liposuction is the only option!

 

[Ingafgrinn Macabre]

I dont fancy losing weight anywhere else though tbh. Just my belly.

Then your only chance is liposuction. It's impossible to remove fat at 1 point, and keep it somewhere else. Focussed training like sit-ups don't work. They'll remove fat, that's true, but not only from your belly. They'll use just as much fat from your 2'nd chin as from your manboobs, as from your belly.

 

[Imgormiel]

A big, massive, fuck off beer belly. And it's only come in the last 3 months.

Seriously now, it doesn't suit me. I have a decent athletic build, toned not to fat not to skinny but my belly is absolutly hanging. God, its such an off put. I don't like sitting down because i have big tyres. Like, 5 of them.

It is really big, i'd post a picture but i'd get banned.

What's a good way of getting rid of my beer belly? I don't wanna be no muscle man with a 24 pack. I just dont want this big thing hanging off my body.

If i done say...100sit ups a night would it actually tone up abit and 'lose' abit of it's bulky-ness ? I dont want to lose weight so jogging would be out of the window.

All the stop drinking beer, stop eating shit posts will fail automatically because all my friends eat shit, drink shit, shit shit and they don't have half the gut i do and i dont want to stop drinking and eating KFC's because i have a gut. All due to metabolism and all that lark yeah, but surely i can get rid of it by sit ups and other home excercises?

Someone is lying to you, you're preggers! ;p

 

[Azurus]

I dont fancy losing weight anywhere else though tbh. Just my belly.

You wont, excess fat (your giant beer gut) will go first.

 

[Laddey]

Then your only chance is liposuction. It's impossible to remove fat at 1 point, and keep it somewhere else. Focussed training like sit-ups don't work. They'll remove fat, that's true, but not only from your belly. They'll use just as much fat from your 2'nd chin as from your manboobs, as from your belly.

You wont, excess fat (your giant beer gut) will go first.

Fight

 

[Azurus]

Fight

We aren't disagreeing, if you don't have much excess fat anywhere else it will be burned from your beerlocker. He was saying you can't target it with any special excercise just general cardio.