How long should you leave it?

[old.user4556]

You meet a gorgeous and really nice girl, you exchange a lot of saliva, you really hit it off conversation wise, you don't want to see the back of one another, you exchange phone numbers, she tells you she wants to see you again, she says that you're hot and that she wants to go out for dinner...

... this was last night, so I texted her at midday to say I got home safe from Glasgow and that i had a good night and to see how she was. No returned text. At about 8pm tonight, I tried to call, no answer - left a voicemail saying "hey it's G from last night, just phoning to say 'hi', give me a call when you get this - bu bye". No returned call.

Ok ok, it hasn't even been 24 hours since I last spoker to her, but I did really like her and I refuse to become a stalking desperado with repeated phone calls so I shall not phone again ... unless that's what she secretly wants me to do? Is there some secret "rule" of phoning when the other person doesn't return the call? Does she want me to pursue her? Should I give it a few days, then try one final time if I haven't heard from her?

She seemed really into me in a big way, it wasn't like a casual chat and a "can i call you some time?". I do feel something more than just an sexual attraction, i've not felt this way since I broke up with my ex a few months back (which is excellent in the 'moving on' stakes).

 

[Mobius]

I would leave it forever and stalk her via myspace.

If I weren't me however, I'd probably give it a few days then ring and ask after her wellbeing etc because you were worried about her not contacting you for a bit then she'll probably phone you and just say like "ohh I ran out of credit, sorry luv!" or whatever women talk like nowadays.

 

[Pfy]

You meet a gorgeous and really nice girl, you exchange a lot of saliva, you really hit it off conversation wise, you don't want to see the back of one another, you exchange phone numbers, she tells you she wants to see you again, she says that you're hot and that she wants to go out for dinner...

... this was last night, so I texted her at midday to say I got home safe from Glasgow and that i had a good night and to see how she was. No returned text. At about 8pm tonight, I tried to call, no answer - left a voicemail saying "hey it's G from last night, just phoning to say 'hi', give me a call when you get this - bu bye". No returned call.

Ok ok, it hasn't even been 24 hours since I last spoker to her, but I did really like her and I refuse to become a stalking desperado with repeated phone calls so I shall not phone again ... unless that's what she secretly wants me to do? Is there some secret "rule" of phoning when the other person doesn't return the call? Does she want me to pursue her? Should I give it a few days, then try one final time if I haven't heard from her?

She seemed really into me in a big way, it wasn't like a casual chat and a "can i call you some time?". I do feel something more than just an sexual attraction, i've not felt this way since I broke up with my ex a few months back (which is excellent in the 'moving on' stakes).

Either leave it a couple of days and call/txt again or simply boil her cat.

 

[MYstIC G]

Let it lie

 

[Chilly]

FLIRT DIVERT!

ahahahah, check the scott mills radio 1 page to see if she really did flirt divert you

 

[Tombha]

wait til monday and see if she gave you the number to a bakery...

 

[Chilly]

This is the flirt divert number btw: 07770 756 408

If that's the one she gave you, forget it and think about how shit you must be

 

[Frizz]

Chilly, you're a cold-hearted man.

G, leave it a for atleast a couple of days. Wouldn't want to be too eager. If no luck, then leave it.

 

[Skyler]

I don't have much experience in this field.. I've never not had a return call and I'm very forgiving so I can wait or be patient...

It's quite hit and miss, on one hand you are thinking she might have missed your messages, been distracted, something bad happened etc. All reasons for you to call again. But on the other you are thinking what if she doesn't want to talk to me, what if I seem to keen etc.

The hardest part in it for me is the leaving of messages, you leave a message in one frame of mind and saying one thing, she will hear that whenever she chooses to listen to it, so if you get it wrong here it's a bad thing. It wouldn't be so bad if you knew you could call again in a couple of days and catch her in person, cause then you get to find out either way and she can't really play games - if she even is.

So I would say leave it for 2-3 days, around then try and find the best possible time to catch her so she answers and you get to speak to her, that's your best chance imo.

 

[pez]

You've already done more than i would do tbh but having said that if you really like her and just can''t chalk it up as a drunken one off then leave it alteast 3 days and giver her one more try.

I know there have been plenty of times i have been drunk really drunk and been all over a girl, exchanged numbers, woken up the next day thought 'wtf was i doing' and spent the next 2 weeks ignoring the girl.

Hmm that was meant to cheer you up, i think i need to work on it

 

[Paradroid]

Have you tried standing on her lawn at night in the pouring rain, clutching a bottle of liquor, and sobbing and wailing "You bitch, I thought we had something, I thought you liked me!!!...why??!! WHY!!??...(*sob*)..."?

At times like these it's always good to ask oneself: what would Wij do?

However, to do that we must first picture the unsuspecting host, lying in their peaceful slumber, when a figure emerges at the window, reminiscent to that scary scene in Salems Lot...tap-tap-tapping on the glass...the sleeper awakens, frozen with horror, their eyes focus towards the window and the source of this unwarranted nocturnal interruption, to reveal the now familiar sight of a half-naked Wij, on the porch roof, slapping his cock against the window again!

 

[JBP|]

Well if it were me i wouldn't phone her at all, unless you really wanted to look like some kind of desperado.

If she is intrested she will phone you (i assume she has your number too?), If not just move along to your next conquest.

 

[Overdriven]

Oh, I was meant to answer those calls? =( Sorry... =D


Haha. Best bet is to leave it a few days, then give her a text or a call asking if she's been alright (as suggested above) - Don't do the whole 100x messages a day route.. =<

 

[Raven]

3-4am is usually a good time to catch someone in, call her then, if she doesn't pick up the first time she obviously didn't get to the phone in time so try again.

 

[old.user4556]

This is the flirt divert number btw: 07770 756 408

If that's the one she gave you, forget it and think about how shit you must be

Didn't you think I already know about that?

oh, i already checked that her phone would ring and it did when we exchanged numbers.

 

[Tilda]

As has been said, leave it 3-4 days give her 1 final ring/txt and if no reply, leave it.

 

[Ch3tan]

oh, i already checked that her phone would ring and it did when we exchanged numbers.

She might have been put off by your paranoia. Let it lie! She'll get back to you if and when she wants to.

 

[MYstIC G]

Maybe she reads this forum and now thinks you're a mental?

 

[Gamah]

You're asking on an internet forum on when to call me? I don't think we should see each other again. By the way..you gave me herpies :<

 

[Pfy]

Send her a letter like that. Obv. if you're not an asian girl then change that bit.

 

[old.Tohtori]

You actually did a bit of "desperate guy" routine there.

Here's how it goes in a nuthsell:

You meet someone, if the person is reasonably sober, you call(never text) not the next but the day after.

If there's no answer, you leave a generic "Hey just taking a poke here to say the other night was real cool" or something.

Then leave it, forever.

Oh and if the person is more then moderately drunk, if you didn't bring her home, you shouldn't be allowed to have testicles

 

[old.user4556]

That's harsh , I don't think I did the desperate guy thing at all, I think it was fair enough to drop a quick text and then one call at night - but that was as far as I was prepared to go.

But since it's been so long since I did the "exchange numbers in a nightclub" routine, I didn't want to kill it by calling a) too late b) too soon, but above all I certainly knew that if she didn't pick up the first time that I was gonna have to leave it at least a few days - try again - then forget it after that. I hate being bombarded with texts myself, let alone calls.

That said, (and this is the confusing part), some of my girl pals think that it's nice to be chased and if the bloke they met doesn't do the chasing then someone else will but they don't want to be harassed - so obviously theres a fine line. I guess it depends on who's doing the chasing, if Anne Widecombe is phoning at all hours, i'd ignore her calls. Then again, should Angelina Jolie wish to phone me religiously; be my guest .

 

[old.user4556]

She might have been put off by your paranoia. Let it lie! She'll get back to you if and when she wants to.

T'was more a case of her giving me her number, then i rang it so she could save the number, if you know what i mean.

 

[tris-]

usually if someone doesnt reply, i text them again later. then maybe later i phone them, for what i think is the last time. then i just keep doing it till they dump me, then i try to stay friends by sending random texts.

just the usual things.

 

[SAS]

Big G rule one... women are not logical and everyone of them is different. Part of the attraction of them I guess, but also part of the annonace .

The night you met might of been perfect, but you have to ask what did she want out of it? She may of got your text and thought "nice guy but problem is boyfriend / married / ex / just split up and can't handle seeing someone / I have a kid he might not want to know etc". Point is there are 101 reasons why she has not replied to you and if after a few days you get no contact I'd drop it.

Easy for me and other guys to say as I know how you feel, but after a few days you'll forget about her and then find someone else.

Lifes to sort to chase after women. If a girl really does like you there will be a balance and it will feel right. I see women as a jigsaw puzzle. You'll meet a girl and things may fit right, but most of the time pieces are trying to be forced together, and something will break, but when the match is right the pieces come together nicely.

As a guide: meet a girl in a pub / club and it goes well and you have her number. One of you swap numbers and drop call the other person (that way you get confirmation shes not giving you a crappy number and does not look like you are checking her). When you leave pub/club do not text. In morning wait until 12pmish then text a normal nice message about how you liked meeting her e.t.c. If there is no reply DONT text again (101 reasons why she might not of replied right away). In evening text again once more and then leave it. 2 days later text one last time and then give up. If she replies though game on...

 

[old.user4556]

She got back in touch, she said as much as she liked me and thought I was lovely, she wasn't looking for anything serious at the moment (translate: a nice way of saying no ), but since then we've texted a couple more times and that we both liked one another and had a very fun night together. She also said she'd see me next time .

Short n sweet, what a great girl, but it'll never be more than some fun with her. Look forward to seeing her again in a couple of weeks!

Edit: she also apologised for leading me on and giving me the wrong idea.

 

[Moo]

You meet a gorgeous and really nice girl, you exchange a lot of saliva, you really hit it off conversation wise, you don't want to see the back of one another, you exchange phone numbers, she tells you she wants to see you again, she says that you're hot and that she wants to go out for dinner...

... this was last night, so I texted her at midday to say I got home safe from Glasgow and that i had a good night and to see how she was. No returned text. At about 8pm tonight, I tried to call, no answer - left a voicemail saying "hey it's G from last night, just phoning to say 'hi', give me a call when you get this - bu bye". No returned call.

Ok ok, it hasn't even been 24 hours since I last spoker to her, but I did really like her and I refuse to become a stalking desperado with repeated phone calls so I shall not phone again ... unless that's what she secretly wants me to do? Is there some secret "rule" of phoning when the other person doesn't return the call? Does she want me to pursue her? Should I give it a few days, then try one final time if I haven't heard from her?

She seemed really into me in a big way, it wasn't like a casual chat and a "can i call you some time?". I do feel something more than just an sexual attraction, i've not felt this way since I broke up with my ex a few months back (which is excellent in the 'moving on' stakes).

edit: kinda pointless post when reading urs just above

 

[old.Tohtori]

She got back in touch, she said as much as she liked me and thought I was lovely, she wasn't looking for anything serious at the moment (translate: a nice way of saying no ), but since then we've texted a couple more times and that we both liked one another and had a very fun night together. She also said she'd see me next time .

Short n sweet, what a great girl, but it'll never be more than some fun with her. Look forward to seeing her again in a couple of weeks!

Edit: she also apologised for leading me on and giving me the wrong idea.

Heh, you do know that THAT doesn't mean that she wants a friend right? *grin*

As amazed as some people might be, she thinks of you as a possible f*ckbuddy. But you might have written this in "just have fun" also, don't know your moral writing ethics

It's so much fun to have friend girls who tell all the dirty secrets

 

[pez]

Heh, you do know that THAT doesn't mean that she wants a friend right? *grin*

As amazed as some people might be, she thinks of you as a possible f*ckbuddy. But you might have written this in "just have fun" also, don't know your moral writing ethics

It's so much fun to have friend girls who tell all the dirty secrets

I don't know i think you might be being too optimistic.

Alot of girls love having guys hanging off them, living in hope even though, they'll never like them or do anything with them.

I think she sounds like one to avoid tbh. Worst thing you can do is start to really really like her.

 

[old.user4556]

Alot of girls love having guys hanging off them, living in hope even though, they'll never like them or do anything with them.

Funny you should mention that, she was there that night with two guys who were "friends". That had alarm bells ringing right off the bat because from my experience in the past, women/girls who like have a large social circle of "male friends" or enjoy flirty social fun with men have always been bad news. The same can be said of womanizing men; any woman hoping to tie him down to exclusivity is on a hiding to nothing.

I remember asking her "is that your boyfriend you're with?" and she said "oh no, they're just my friends". Does she not have female friends to go out with... *shrug*.

Also re the desperation thing: I think if you like someone, and someone likes you; why fuck about? If I gave a girl my number, because I liked her, and she texted the next day - i wouldn't bat an eye lid, infact i'd like her to because I liked her. But that's just me, I guess people like to play games of "don't look keen", but I think those people have been watching too much Sex In The City or Hollyoaks.