Herberts

[Tom]

http://www.smartdriving.co.uk/Driving/Driving_emergencies/Driving_emergencies.html

I knew I was right

 

[dysfunction]

Action for front tyre blowouts

This will cause the car to pull heavily to one side.

I've had a tyre blow (and been in a few others with others driving) out in the back and had no trouble controlling the car.

If the car suddenly pulls heavily to the one side as it does with a front tyre then you are likely to go into another lane into traffic...

So to me front tyre is worse...

 

[Whipped]

I guess all you can really pray for is that the person in the other lane is on their toes. Either that or all 4 of your tyres puncture at the same time.

Wonder what the actual odds are of that.

*Mails Hawking*

 

[Nos]

Call me crazy, but I think all four tyres blowing at the same time would be a smidgen worse than just the one popping it's clogs :/

 

[Frizz]

You should all know 4 tyres popped is worse than one because of the physics engine in Vice City!

 

[dysfunction]

You can't argue with that...

 

[WPKenny]

You should all know 4 tyres popped is worse than one because of the physics engine in Vice City!

To paraphrase the title of a book relating to movies,

"Everything I know I learnt from computer games."

 

[Deadmanwalking]

It was in Brighton?

Should have told them you were gay and starting coming on to them. That would have got rid of them bloody sharpish. Mind you, you wouldn't have been able to sit down for a week after.

 

[Frizz]

To paraphrase the title of a book relating to movies,

"Everything I know I learnt from computer games."

I hope my sarcasm wasn't lost on you, and you're saying that merely to knock me down a notch.

 

[Bullitt]

Yeah , like i know that sohuld i ever come across a giant spider/beastie or dragon it's weak spot will be the only unarmoured part...and possibly 'glowy'. And if I shoot a man 7 times in the foot he will drop dead. Fact.

 

[Mazling]

You could shoot off the foot with at max 3 shots, and then beat the person in the face with it - with the gun behind it.

 

[nath]

Three shots from what? A Shotgun?

I very much doubt a standard 9mm would take someones foot off with 3 shots though, maybe a Desert Eagle would.. but that's a hand cannon.

 

[mank!]

Ever seen what a Mag .44 will do to a woman's pussy?

 

[Brynn]

Ever seen what a Mag .44 will do to a woman's pussy?

urm......

 

[nath]

Ever seen what a Mag .44 will do to a woman's pussy?

I presume that's from a film, but honestly I have no clue. :|

 

[mank!]

Taxi Driver!

 

[Bullitt]

Yeah, sure

"It's off 'Taxi Driver' me-lud, twas not my intention to go rummaging around the underpants of young ladies with a handgun i swear it"

Your nicked!

 

[Damini]

Smashed car window.

I'm at the end of my fucking tether.

 

[Damini]

http://www.intrepidmedia.com/column.asp?id=1818

 

[Jupitus]

http://www.intrepidmedia.com/column.asp?id=1818

 

[Gumbo]

I second the . I wish there was something else you could do, but from your column it seems you're trying everything, I really feel for you.

In a cross posting frenzy from the recent mention of housing costs, I could just about afford a one bed flat in a street that suffers like yours has apparently suffered of late. But I don't see how I could face it. Bring on the revolution when this chav scum gets rounded up and punished properly, it makes me sooooo mad, nnnngh.

Hang in there and keep reporting even the tiniest incident, 999 them all too. Eventually as the crime figures get worse and worse the Chief Constable will have to go, 'Oooh that street is making me look bad, time we did something about that.'. Hopefully.

Let me leave you with another Good Luck mate.

 

[Wazzerphuk]

I second the . I wish there was something else you could do, but from your column it seems you're trying everything, I really feel for you.

In a cross posting frenzy from the recent mention of housing costs, I could just about afford a one bed flat in a street that suffers like yours has apparently suffered of late. But I don't see how I could face it. Bring on the revolution when this chav scum gets rounded up and punished properly, it makes me sooooo mad, nnnngh.

Hang in there and keep reporting even the tiniest incident, 999 them all too. Eventually as the crime figures get worse and worse the Chief Constable will have to go, 'Oooh that street is making me look bad, time we did something about that.'. Hopefully.

Let me leave you with another Good Luck mate.

You're a prick. Call 999?

I can't type any more, I really can't. There aren't words to describe what a **** you are for suggesting that.

Irresponsible fucking ****. **** **** **** **** ****.

 

[Gumbo]

You really think phoning the switchboard is getting her anywhere?

Maybe just doing nothing is the way ahead eh, put up with the sexual assaults? Let the arson continue, shell out an extra 50 quid a day on new tyres?

Yay for apathy!

 

[Gumbo]

Ok, I'm not saying, dial 999 when you see a kid dropping a sweet wrapper, but when they crash a stolen car into your wall, and start jumping about on the roof, yeah, I think it's worth notifying the police by the most expediant method.

When three aggressive youths are standing on your doorstep pushing cigarrettes through your letterbox, and your'e a female alone in your home, marvellous idea to phone a receptionist and wait 48 hours for the police to phone you back with a crime number.

The largest part of your council tax pays for the police. FFS if you can't summon them when you feel your person is being threatened, when exactly should you phone them?

 

[dysfunction]

999 is for life threatening emergencies only...no wonder they dont get to people who are on their death beds with people phoning up about a puncture.

Call your local police department...thats what they are there for!

Come on Gumbo get with it!

 

[Gumbo]

If you were on your death bed you'd call the police?

buh?

OK maybe I was wrong to say 'tiniest incident', but surely if you spot youths joyriding you can phone 999 to get an emergency police response. My local police switchboard isn't even manned 24hours. If you see an old woman getting robbed in the street, so long as she's not getting beaten in a life threatening way, you should wait till you get home and sit in the queue till a bored receptionist takes your details?

999 does cover 4 Emergency services in this country, believe me I'm as pissed off as anyone when people phone for an ambulance cos they have a headache, but the police are still there to provide an emergency service. Feeling scared for my safety in my own home, because people are posting lit fags through my doorway, would seem to me to be an emergency.

 

[Driwen]

btw cant the cops actually just patrol the street for long periods of time and at random days for a month?

 

[Gumbo]

Apparently they will be too busy attending life threatening, death bed style emergencies

That and doling out speeding fines.

 

[Damini]

I dialled 999 when I saw them crashing a stolen car, but other than that I just call the switch board. And patrolling isn't all that much good, because they use the road as a through route, and not to gather. It's a dark shortcut. Ideally, they would adopt the road, put up street lights and actually investigate crime instead of just using my constant reports to draw up pie charts.

 

[Tom]

Become a vilgilante. Wait until the kids separate at night, follow one home, and chuck a bucket of pink gloss paint over his head. Repeat to different kids at random intervals.