R
Rodders
Guest
With the start of Cammlann, and the importance of guilds on that server, there’s going to be a massive growth in new guilds. Having been an officer in a number of guilds in a number of games, including this one, I’ve had a fair amount of experience of the different personality types which make up the player community. We all have different elements in our characters, and people slip from one category to another, but most have a dominant characteristic. So, for anyone out there thinking of starting a guild, or any existing officers who just need to feel someone understands, this is an officer’s guide to guild members.
Helpers
These people in real life are probably social workers, nurses or primary school teachers. They exist to help, they want no recognition, they make your life easier. You love these people. You want to have their babies. There are about 5 of them in every thousand players. If you get one, hold them, love them, caress them, never let them go.
Classes - They tend to play group-friendly support characters – healers, bladeturns, defensive tanks.
Loyalty – they will never leave. They’re likely to be the people carrying on the guild name even after it’s disbanded.
Most likely to say – “Would you like me to do that interview for you ?” “I’ve sorted out the rams for the raid. When do you want them ?”
Least likely to say – “Sod this, I’m off.”
Rank&File
The core of your guild. Probably the majority unless you’re unlucky. These people say little, get on with their business and don’t bother you. They turn up at guild events, although sometimes you’re not quite sure why, as they don’t actually SAY anything. Chances are that the first time you notice some of them is when you recruit them, and the last time is, errr…, there isn’t another time. These people just want a strife-free gaming experience. As long as the ship is steady, they’ll stay. But if the atmosphere turns sour, they’re likely to jump on any departing bandwagon.
Classes - They spread across all classes, but you’ll find a lot of these folks in your solid tank force.
Loyalty – they will not leave unless pushed.
Most likely to say – “---“
Least likely to say – “Hi folks, anyone fancy a good chat while we level ?”
Grumblers
These are your blokes-down-the-pub. Their existence is defined by a non-specific feeling of discontent. Never entirely absent, but never strong enough to actually make them get off their arse and do something about it. They’re not dangerous in small numbers, and like many blokes down the pub, can be amusing and good company. But get enough of them together and guild morale drops faster than a whore’s pants. The key with these people is that they need to be in a guild in order to have something to moan at. They’ll actually be quite upset if the guild they moan about ends, because then they have to find another to join and moan about.
Classes - Grumblers can be any class, but take a close look at your casters in particular; ever wondered why people who choose to play characters with cloth armour then seem to moan so much about dying quickly in melee ? You’ve found a grumbler.
Loyalty – Surprisingly high. Every now and again, one will persuade himself to leave. When he finds that he can’t moan at himself in isolation, he’s likely to want to return.
Most likely to say – “Yeah, I know we got all three relics and killed the dragon in one day, but we could have done it faster.”
Least likely to say – “Thanks for that, I really enjoyed it”
Drama Queens
These people should have been given more hugs by their mothers. They crave your attention. They need to be central. They are, without doubt, the most annoying members of your organisation. They’re the ones who always have something to say, even when there’s nothing worth saying. Have a guild meeting or event and you can guarantee that the drama queen will find a way of taking centre stage. As there’s nothing worse in their eyes than being ignored, they will even invent conflict to get more attention. These people love to be victims. As an officer, you may not even know them, but you can be sure that they’re already convinced you hate them/love them/think about them hourly. They’re likely to wear garish outfits to draw attention to themselves – you can be sure that these people WILL have glowing weapons. They like nothing better than to hint repeatedly that they’re thinking of leaving, in the hope of getting people to beg them to stay. For once in life, the old adage is true : ignore them and they will go away.
Classes - Obvious candidates are extrovert characters – skalds, bards, minstrels. Also likely to play very rare classes.
Loyalty – depends entirely on the level of attention.
Most likely to say – Anything. Anything at all. Loudly. Repeatedly.
Least likely to say – “I don’t have an opinion on that”
Islands
These people think they’re playing an offline game with NPCs. They believe the whole purpose of your guild is to serve their every need. You can spot these types easily. They’re the ones who will complain endlessly that they can’t get a guild group for levelling, and then literally minutes after they hit 50, complain endlessly that they can’t get a guild group for RvR. Their idea of hardship is waiting 30 seconds for anything. Their idea of socializing is standing in a crowd yelling “lfg”. They have never actually done anything for other people in their whole gaming existence. In DAoC they are likely to get to level 50 without making any friends at all. After all, why would they make friends with NPCs ? They’re also those most likely to spit the dummy if anything doesn’t go according to plan. It’s hard to despise these people, because hell, we all remember what it was like being an angry 13-year-old. But get too many, and they’ll start to influence your rank&file.
Classes – The defining feature of an Island is that he will whine enormously about a situation which other players would love to be in. So it’s no surprise that you’ll find a lot amongst your stealthing classes.
Loyalty – none at all. The Guild is there to serve them, not the other way around. They’ll join another guild without hesitation if they think it’ll give them 5% more XP or RPs.
Most likely to say – “This guild is crap. I logged on 1 minute ago and I still haven’t been offered an uber group to do [fill in immediate priority here]. I’m off to join Nolby Pride.”
Least likely to say – “I’m thinking of setting up a group to help others XP. Anyone care to join me ?”
Snakes
These are the scorpions in your slippers. They are not nice people. This is why they can never manage their own successful guild. They are consumed with jealousy of those who can. Rest assured that their intention is to bring YOU down, and if the guild goes too, that’s just collateral damage. They will never seek open conflict, preferring to work in the shadows, inventing complaints and cultivating an audience of discontent. Every time a member doesn’t get exactly what they want from you, no matter how unreasonable, the Snake will appear at their shoulder, whispering sympathy - even if the day before they were sympathetic to someone who wanted the exact opposite. A sign that a Snake is at work is when you realise that a group of your people are starting to act separately to the rest of the Guild. By this time, you’re in trouble. When they Snake thinks they have the support they need, they will strike. This will not take the form of a direct complaint by the Snake, but rather the Snake “representing the views” of a disenchanted group. Many Guilds have been brought down by these people. Knowing that their back-stabbing and hypocrisy means that they can never effectively run a Guild themselves is no consolation if you’re watching them from the rubble of your own ruined organisation. Do not try to reason or make friends with these people. The whole point is that their grievances are invented in order to damage you. As long as you are an officer, you’ll be the enemy. Root these people out and remove them. They are cancer.
Classes – if only they were so easy to spot.
Loyalty – None whatsoever.
Most likely to say (quietly) – “I just wanted to say that I though it was really unfair that the officers wouldn’t powerlevel your character for you while you went on holiday. I’ve always thought a good guild should do that.”
Least likely to say – “Our officers do a damn fine job in difficult circumstances”
To all Guild officers everywhere – don’t let the buggers get you down.
Helpers
These people in real life are probably social workers, nurses or primary school teachers. They exist to help, they want no recognition, they make your life easier. You love these people. You want to have their babies. There are about 5 of them in every thousand players. If you get one, hold them, love them, caress them, never let them go.
Classes - They tend to play group-friendly support characters – healers, bladeturns, defensive tanks.
Loyalty – they will never leave. They’re likely to be the people carrying on the guild name even after it’s disbanded.
Most likely to say – “Would you like me to do that interview for you ?” “I’ve sorted out the rams for the raid. When do you want them ?”
Least likely to say – “Sod this, I’m off.”
Rank&File
The core of your guild. Probably the majority unless you’re unlucky. These people say little, get on with their business and don’t bother you. They turn up at guild events, although sometimes you’re not quite sure why, as they don’t actually SAY anything. Chances are that the first time you notice some of them is when you recruit them, and the last time is, errr…, there isn’t another time. These people just want a strife-free gaming experience. As long as the ship is steady, they’ll stay. But if the atmosphere turns sour, they’re likely to jump on any departing bandwagon.
Classes - They spread across all classes, but you’ll find a lot of these folks in your solid tank force.
Loyalty – they will not leave unless pushed.
Most likely to say – “---“
Least likely to say – “Hi folks, anyone fancy a good chat while we level ?”
Grumblers
These are your blokes-down-the-pub. Their existence is defined by a non-specific feeling of discontent. Never entirely absent, but never strong enough to actually make them get off their arse and do something about it. They’re not dangerous in small numbers, and like many blokes down the pub, can be amusing and good company. But get enough of them together and guild morale drops faster than a whore’s pants. The key with these people is that they need to be in a guild in order to have something to moan at. They’ll actually be quite upset if the guild they moan about ends, because then they have to find another to join and moan about.
Classes - Grumblers can be any class, but take a close look at your casters in particular; ever wondered why people who choose to play characters with cloth armour then seem to moan so much about dying quickly in melee ? You’ve found a grumbler.
Loyalty – Surprisingly high. Every now and again, one will persuade himself to leave. When he finds that he can’t moan at himself in isolation, he’s likely to want to return.
Most likely to say – “Yeah, I know we got all three relics and killed the dragon in one day, but we could have done it faster.”
Least likely to say – “Thanks for that, I really enjoyed it”
Drama Queens
These people should have been given more hugs by their mothers. They crave your attention. They need to be central. They are, without doubt, the most annoying members of your organisation. They’re the ones who always have something to say, even when there’s nothing worth saying. Have a guild meeting or event and you can guarantee that the drama queen will find a way of taking centre stage. As there’s nothing worse in their eyes than being ignored, they will even invent conflict to get more attention. These people love to be victims. As an officer, you may not even know them, but you can be sure that they’re already convinced you hate them/love them/think about them hourly. They’re likely to wear garish outfits to draw attention to themselves – you can be sure that these people WILL have glowing weapons. They like nothing better than to hint repeatedly that they’re thinking of leaving, in the hope of getting people to beg them to stay. For once in life, the old adage is true : ignore them and they will go away.
Classes - Obvious candidates are extrovert characters – skalds, bards, minstrels. Also likely to play very rare classes.
Loyalty – depends entirely on the level of attention.
Most likely to say – Anything. Anything at all. Loudly. Repeatedly.
Least likely to say – “I don’t have an opinion on that”
Islands
These people think they’re playing an offline game with NPCs. They believe the whole purpose of your guild is to serve their every need. You can spot these types easily. They’re the ones who will complain endlessly that they can’t get a guild group for levelling, and then literally minutes after they hit 50, complain endlessly that they can’t get a guild group for RvR. Their idea of hardship is waiting 30 seconds for anything. Their idea of socializing is standing in a crowd yelling “lfg”. They have never actually done anything for other people in their whole gaming existence. In DAoC they are likely to get to level 50 without making any friends at all. After all, why would they make friends with NPCs ? They’re also those most likely to spit the dummy if anything doesn’t go according to plan. It’s hard to despise these people, because hell, we all remember what it was like being an angry 13-year-old. But get too many, and they’ll start to influence your rank&file.
Classes – The defining feature of an Island is that he will whine enormously about a situation which other players would love to be in. So it’s no surprise that you’ll find a lot amongst your stealthing classes.
Loyalty – none at all. The Guild is there to serve them, not the other way around. They’ll join another guild without hesitation if they think it’ll give them 5% more XP or RPs.
Most likely to say – “This guild is crap. I logged on 1 minute ago and I still haven’t been offered an uber group to do [fill in immediate priority here]. I’m off to join Nolby Pride.”
Least likely to say – “I’m thinking of setting up a group to help others XP. Anyone care to join me ?”
Snakes
These are the scorpions in your slippers. They are not nice people. This is why they can never manage their own successful guild. They are consumed with jealousy of those who can. Rest assured that their intention is to bring YOU down, and if the guild goes too, that’s just collateral damage. They will never seek open conflict, preferring to work in the shadows, inventing complaints and cultivating an audience of discontent. Every time a member doesn’t get exactly what they want from you, no matter how unreasonable, the Snake will appear at their shoulder, whispering sympathy - even if the day before they were sympathetic to someone who wanted the exact opposite. A sign that a Snake is at work is when you realise that a group of your people are starting to act separately to the rest of the Guild. By this time, you’re in trouble. When they Snake thinks they have the support they need, they will strike. This will not take the form of a direct complaint by the Snake, but rather the Snake “representing the views” of a disenchanted group. Many Guilds have been brought down by these people. Knowing that their back-stabbing and hypocrisy means that they can never effectively run a Guild themselves is no consolation if you’re watching them from the rubble of your own ruined organisation. Do not try to reason or make friends with these people. The whole point is that their grievances are invented in order to damage you. As long as you are an officer, you’ll be the enemy. Root these people out and remove them. They are cancer.
Classes – if only they were so easy to spot.
Loyalty – None whatsoever.
Most likely to say (quietly) – “I just wanted to say that I though it was really unfair that the officers wouldn’t powerlevel your character for you while you went on holiday. I’ve always thought a good guild should do that.”
Least likely to say – “Our officers do a damn fine job in difficult circumstances”
To all Guild officers everywhere – don’t let the buggers get you down.
that was brilliant 
I'm a drama Queen!!