Good Comebacks

T

tisme

Guest
Might be old but they made me smile :)

Good Comebacks

Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Perhaps. I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."

Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

Man: "Is this seat empty?"
Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man: "Your place or mine?"
Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."

Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."

Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."

Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not Enter"

Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman: "Unfertilized !"

Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason"
Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"

Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy:
Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing".

Man: "Your body is like a temple."
Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."

Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there?

Hope u enjoy em too
 
W

Whisperess

Guest
Originally posted by tisme
Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy:
Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing".
Click to expand...
rofl :D
 
C

Conchabar

Guest
phew thx god i dont know women that say that
 
W

Whisperess

Guest
Originally posted by Conchabar
phew thx god i dont know women
Click to expand...
aww :(

there there conchy, it'll all be better in a few years. :D
 
S

swords

Guest
i do remember one of my female jitsuka friends say to a guy who followed her round the night club all night:

''look, there is not enough alcohol in this bar to make me want to sleep with you now FUCK OFF''

should have seen the colour drain from this blokes face :)
some people just dont take subtle hints eh :wink:
 
C

Coim-

Guest
Hehe. Yeah, some of them were pretty old, still funny though. :D
 
B

BlitheringIdiot

Guest
Man: "I have a level 50 skald, Ive capped all his resists"

Try to find a comeback to that chat up line!

I are teh Smooth Criminal.

(It worked on saltys imaginary girlfriend anyway)
 
O

old.Dillinja

Guest
What's a 'cha-tup line'? Some kind of dance?

edit ; bleh.
 
W

Whisperess

Guest
Originally posted by BlitheringIdiot
Man: "I have a level 50 skald, Ive capped all his resists"
Click to expand...
Woman: Nice, is that to compensate for him not being able to perform?
 
W

Whisperess

Guest
Originally posted by BlitheringIdiot
Man: "I have a level 50 skald, Ive capped all his resists"
Click to expand...
Or!

Woman: "I must've capped whatever resist-table you're on."
 
O

old.Dillinja

Guest
Originally posted by Whisperess
Or!

Woman: "I must've capped whatever resist-table you're on."
Click to expand...

Heh, that one was pretty good.
 
S

'Shy

Guest
How about:

Woman: A skald??? Hahahahha I wtfpwn you with my ubah1337 infil
 
B

BlitheringIdiot

Guest
Originally posted by 'Shy
How about:

Woman: A skald??? Hahahahha I wtfpwn you with my ubah1337 infil
Click to expand...

Then I'd propose to them.
 
O

old.Dillinja

Guest
Maybe he likes a woman who takes control. :p
 
O

old.Dillinja

Guest
Me, and unless you want me to edit that last post to 'man' I think you should be quiet. ;)

Edit : I just noticed something btw, if you scroll down the page really fast everything looks like it's written in italics. :D
 
B

BlitheringIdiot

Guest
Speaking of which...

How did you get that cloak you were wearing in your 'Aegi does emain' video whisp?
 
W

Whisperess

Guest
Originally posted by BlitheringIdiot
Speaking of which...

How did you get that cloak you were wearing in your 'Aegi does emain' video whisp?
Click to expand...
lol, so it was you who 'haxx0red' your way around the ftp, git :p
( those were not meant for eyes outside the guild :p )

it's from the GOA event. ( Black Queen etc )
 
B

BlitheringIdiot

Guest
Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Perhaps. I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."
Man: "Oh thats right 'dirty receptionist gone wild III', you're very talented.

Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."
Man: "Afraid you couldnt keep yourself away from me?"

Man: "Is this seat empty?"
Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."
Man: "Because you'll be on my lap, am I right or am I right!"

Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"
Man: "Yours it is then!"

Man: "Your place or mine?"
Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."
Man: "Its ok, ill go home and wank of to images of you, that way I win and you loose."

Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."
Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."
Man: "Its ok, ill go home and wank..."

Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."
Man: "Still in training?"

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not Enter"
Man: "Please use the back entrance?"

Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman: "Unfertilized !"
Man: "Anal it is then!"

Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason"
Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"
Man: "OMG! ...I just came with excitement, sorry"

Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."
Man: "Dont make me wank again!"

Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
Man: "Ill go spend my millions on some other girl then... :("

Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy:
Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing".
Man: "Dont worry, you wont be conscious."

Man: "Your body is like a temple."
Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."
Man: "So you're free all day! Me too!."

Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."
Man: "Sure! I've got a lovely 4-figure debt you could have."

Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you."
Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there? "
Man: "They have porn there?"

Capped my charisma too...
 
B

BlitheringIdiot

Guest
Originally posted by Whisperess
lol, so it was you who 'haxx0red' your way around the ftp, git :p
( those were not meant for eyes outside the guild :p )

it's from the GOA event. ( Black Queen etc )
Click to expand...

The naked one was funny. :D
 
W

Whisperess

Guest
Originally posted by BlitheringIdiot
The naked one was funny. :D
Click to expand...
Thanks :D It was a fun event :)
The event lasted way over an hour though, and even with the downsizing the the movie is still a tad bit long :)

( and before you complain about playstyle in the DF movie - that was the actual first run I had after months of not playing her and with a trial spec :) thank god I don't have that spec anymore :D )
 
B

BlitheringIdiot

Guest
It was the bit where you waited for the two greys and two greens to start xping before you killed them, that I found funny. :p
 
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