Funny Spam

~Yuckfou~

Lovely person
Joined
Dec 22, 2003
Messages
2,594
This had me in pleats.....


----------------------------------------------------------
APPEAL FOR URGENT ASSISTANCE.


Dear,

With due respect and with GOD all thing are
possible that is why I call for help to please Permit
me to inform you of my desire of going into business relationship with you. I got your contact from foreign trade bussiness chember.

I prayed 7 days prayer over it and selected your name
among other names due to its esteeming nature and there commendations given to me as a reputable and trust worthy person that I can do business with and by the recommendation , I must not hesitate to confide in you for this simple and sincere clean business 100% risk free assurance and I will like you to know that all neccesery arrengement have been ready.

I am Micheal Radci the only son of late Mr and Mrs .
decot radci, My father was a very wealthy cocoa merchant in Abidjan the economic capital of Ivory coast, my father was poisoned to death by his business associates on one of their outings on a business trip .

My mother died when I was a baby and since then my
father took me so special. Before the death of my
father on January 2004 in a private hospital here in
Abidjan he secretly called me on his bed side and
told me that he has the sum of ten million,five
hundred thousand United State Dollars.US$10,500,000 left in fixed /suspense account in one of the prime bank here in Abidjan that he used my name as his only son for the next of Kin in Depositing of the fund.

He also explained to me that it was because of this
wealth that he was poisoned by his business
associates. That I should seek for a foreign partner
in a country of my choice where i will transfer this
money and use it for investment purpose such as real
estate management or hotel management and I wil like
you to know that before I contacted you I have been
introduce you to the bank director where my late
father deposited the my money before he died and the
bank director told me that they are ready to transfer
this money directly to your account as a new
beneficiary of this money. then I will like you to get back to me intime so that I can gave you the contact of the bank where my latefatehr deposited deposite the money for you to spoke to the director so that we can proceed imediately and I wil like yout o get back to me imediately you receieve this mail so that we can settle this matter amicably and I will be waiting to hear from you in my hotel where I lodge my self becuase those bussiness association people that kill my father they are looking for me to kill me so that they can claim this money, so I will like you to please get back to me imediately so that we can proceed. I am honourably seeking your assistance in the following ways, so that I can go and summited it to the bank for imediately procedure.


(1) To provide a bank account in which this money
would be transferred into.

(2) To serve as a guardian of this fund since I am
only 22 years old.

(3) To make arrangement for me to come over to your
country to further my education and to secure a
resident permit in your country.
Moreover, I am willing to offer you 20% of the
total sum as compensation for your effort/input after
the successful transfer of this fund into your
nominated account overseas.
All the necessary arrangement has been made at the
bank where my late father deposited this fund and the
DIRECTOR of the bank told me that as soon as an
account of my choice is forwarded to their bank that
they will transfer this fund to my destination.

Please RING me immediate you received this mail for
us to proceed in this transaction which I beleived
that you shall call me for good news that you have
comfirm my money in an account which you will provide.

Furthermore, you indicate your options towards
assisting me as I believe that this transaction would
be concluded within seven (7) days you signify
interest to assist me.

So thank you for your understandinga nd my GOD be with
you till the day we are going to see face to face in
your country and I will like you to always pray for me
as orphan like me who have lost is parent.

Thanks and God bless you.

Best regards,

Micheal Radci.


I will be waiting for your call in the Hotel where I lodge + 22507864655

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

I'll bet some stupid fuck probably in America is reading a mail just like that, "Hunny, jeez we have to help this poor guy!".
 

tris-

Failed Geordie and Parmothief
Joined
Jan 2, 2004
Messages
15,260
can you pm me his email address so i can have some fun?
 

Chilly

Balls of steel
Joined
Dec 22, 2003
Messages
9,046
i think the forum email address rule should have an exemption clause for "targets who are fucking asking for it" - deebs, make it so!
 

tris-

Failed Geordie and Parmothief
Joined
Jan 2, 2004
Messages
15,260
here is the story so far, my email at the bottom and his reply at the top
---------------------------
Dear Father,


I received your mail and the contents was well
understood, Also I will like you to know that we have
to proceed without wasting any more time since you are
with me I will like you to hang all what ever you are
doing for now and let us face this transaction with
all our mind so that within few days you can call me
for good news that you have received this money in an
account which you will provide to the bank where my
late father deposited this money. However,I really
thank you so much for your concern towards this
transaction which I believed that with your urgent
respond as I command you to do in few days you shall
call me for good news that you have received this
money in your account, and I will like you to please
to always call me in the hotel where I lodge so that
we can talk about the investments of this money after
the confirmation of this money in your account which
you are going to provide to the bank where this
transaction is going to take place to your account,
becuase I have make you to be the new Beneficiary of
this money. As you are already known that Am urgently
in need for this money to be transfer into your
account so that I will be coming to your country and
continue my sociology in one of the university there
while this money will be wisely invested by you in the
investment which you like and after the 25% of the
total money transfer into your account which was
instructed by my late father before his sudden death
to compensate your effort input during this
transaction, the profit that we make in the investment
will be share between you and me.

Now the Director of the bank told me that they will
like to hear from you to tell you their requirement to
transfer this money into your account which you will
provide to them.

Please call the bank firsthing on monday morning as
you can see that the bank director have ready to
transfer this money to your account which you are
going to provide to their bank immediately they hear
from you on monday morning.

Here is the contact of the bank


Name of Bank : West Atlantic Bank


Director : Dr. Pichop Jean(contact person)


Phone N° : + 225 0726 0754 ext 121

mail :


Fax N° : + 225 212 76260

Please you can contact the bank through their mail
address as you can see that i have already introduce
you to the bank as a new beneficiary to this money at
their bank and they have ready to transfer this money
into your account immediately they hear from you. then
please i will like you to look for good investment
which we are going to use this money for after the
confirmation of this money in your account as you can
see that this money it is very big amount of money and
all what we have to do is to invest it after the
confirmation of this money after the confirmation of
this money in your account which you are going to
provide to the bank where the tranfer is going to take
place to your account tommorow. i will like you to
contact the bank director through their mail address
tommorow morning because i want this money to be in
your account fast, so that i can come to your country
to come and continue my education moreoever to come
and be with you for the rest of my life as you can see
that those association peolpe that kill my lata
father, they are still looking for me to kill me, so
that they can heritage my late father money.

I will be waiting to hear from you immediately you
finish with the bank and you have to keep this matter
confidenciallly because this money it is my last hope
which God give to me and you as a father and mother
because you are now my father.

Thanks for your mail and God bless you for helping an
orphan like me.

Best regards
Micheal radci.











--- Tristram <
> Dear,
> I would like to answer your call of help with a
> great big YES I WILL DO IT!
>
> I am glad that GOD picked me, as we have had a great
> past when it comes to things like this. He has
> picked me on several occasions such as getting
> someone to finance the Statue of Liberty and trying
> to find out who shot JR.
>
> I am sorry to hear of your fathers poisoning. I did
> wonder why the profits of cocoa dropped in that
> particula area by 3.65%. I am also sad to hear of
> your mother dieing, but GOD must of picked them for
> their business prowess and he probably needed
> funding to rebuild the pearly gates of heaven.
>
> I have speaking to my solicitor (Foboff, scame &
> son), and they agreed that your proposal is
> legitimate and there is absolutley nothing illegal
> or dishonest about it. My bank is ready to recieve
> you.
>
> I am a willing guardian currently 40 years of age.
> As you know i live in the UK so the government
> allows you free roaming over the borders and you can
> join any school you like. If you cannot get in
> through a legitimate route, try to jump in a lorry
> or run through the channel tunnel.
>
> I am afraid i cannot call you as my phone is tapped
> but i am also deaf and mute.
>
> I will pray for you every day, young Micheal. MAY
> GOD HAVE MERCY ON YOUR SOUL.
>
> Blessings and love,
>
> Mr T.
 

Calaen

I am a massive cock who isn't firing atm!
Joined
Dec 22, 2003
Messages
9,537
omfg.. How pissed would you be if it was legit tho :)
 

tris-

Failed Geordie and Parmothief
Joined
Jan 2, 2004
Messages
15,260
lol. mine at the bottom again

Dear Father Tristram,
>
> Sir, i receieved your mail and the contents was
> well understood, however i will like you to know that
> you dont need to worry about this transaction and i
> dont want you to inform any body about this
> transaction again as you can see that we are doing
> this bussiness base on trust. now i will like you to
> know that since you have ready to help out of this
> problem, then i will like you to lets us finish
> everything through mail address since you can not hear
> and you can not speak i dont want you to worry about
> it because i know that i always like to pray, then my
> believed is that after the confirmation of this money
> in your country, then my coimming to your country you
> will be hear in jesus name and you will be speaking in
> the name of Jesus Amen because i really trust in God
> in God i trust. now i will like you to know that you
> dont have anything to do with your bank all what you
> have to do is to contact the bank where this money was
> deposited as you can see that their bank are ready to
> transfer this money into your account as you can see
> that you a new beneficiary to this money at their bank
> and this money is going into your account directly, so
> i will like you to settle with your bank and send your
> account information to the bank throgh their mail
> address for to proceed immediately in this transaction
> as you can see that we need to get everything done
> because i my self i have problem with the manager of
> the Hotel where i lodge. please if you really know
> that you are ready to help me out, then you should
> keep this matter confidencaily you dont need to worry
> your bank as you can see that immediately this money
> confirm in your account, then your bank will be
> calloing you to give you good news that you have such
> amount of the money in your account, then you will now
> go to your bank to go znd have access to this money
> because you are the beneficiary to this money, so i
> will like you to contact the bank tommorow through
> their mail address as you can see that the transfer
> will be commence tommorow, so you dont need to go to
> your bank. because the bank is going to transfer this
> money to your bank through their electrnics wire of
> transfer.
>
> I will be waiting to hear from you immediately you
> finish with the contact the bank through mail address
> tommorow and get back to me, so that i can know when
> my late father money will be confirm in your account
> which you are going to provide to the bank.. or do
> you want diplomatic to bring this money for you in
> your country by wesday for you to see this money face
> to face and the diplomatic will be deliver you the
> money through 21 thunks boxs. i will be wanting to
> hear from you if you need it like that, then you can
> told the bank director immediately you contacted him
> through mail.
>
> Thanks for your mail and God bless.
>
> Best regards
> Micheal radci.

------------------------------
Dear Micheal
Before i can give you my bank details, i will need a deposit of no less than
50USD otherwise my bank will not let me give out details for such a big
transaction. For a transaction like this, my bank has to pay for a red
carpet and a limosine to carry the giant size comical cheque. Could you
please observe that i am deaf and mute and so unable to phone any numbers.
I am sure i made this clear in my previous email. My solicitors would also
like to speak to a legal representitive of yours, before we can accept your
50USD deposit. You will need a legal repesentitive from my country, i can
supply phone numbers for you to hire one.
You mentioned people are trying to kill you? I am unsure if i can allow you
to live with me if you have assasins after you. What protection can you
supply me?

God bless and many hugs,

Mr T.
 

jaba

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Dec 25, 2003
Messages
780
Set up a new bank account and give him the details!! Do it!! :clap:
 

tris-

Failed Geordie and Parmothief
Joined
Jan 2, 2004
Messages
15,260
Dommers said:
There deaf and mute bit had me in tears. :D
it is me who is deaf and mute :D couldnt think of any other way of getting out of phoning him. jaba do you know anywhere i can quickly setup a bank acct, afaik you have to go through all kinds of shit now because of money laundering.
 

tris-

Failed Geordie and Parmothief
Joined
Jan 2, 2004
Messages
15,260
ive already got an egg account :/
 

tris-

Failed Geordie and Parmothief
Joined
Jan 2, 2004
Messages
15,260
lol, this guy is teh funnies. my reply to the last email at the bottom, his latest reply at the top. woot i have a new son!

Dear Father Tristram,

I will be going to the bank to inform the bank
director that you need this money to be move through
the Diplomatic. i will ge back to you immediately, i
return from theb bank.

Thanks for your mail and God bless.

Best regards
Micheal radci.
FRom Your Son.


<écrit :
> Dear Micheal the prude,
> I would like it if you could have a diplomat meet
> with the money as it is
> quicker for me and my bank account has been stopped
> at the moment. I called
> the bank but they will not tell me why my bank
> account has been stopped but
> they are currently investigating some activity. You
> have still not told me
> what protection you can offer if people are still
> after you. I maybe
> unwilling to carry this out if you can not protect
> me from the black tiger
> clans that are after you. If you come to live with
> me then i will need
> protection also. I have currently secured you a
> position in the University
> of Holy Sancramony. They will be able to continue
> your learning. I am
> currently decorating a room for you to stay in but i
> need to know the
> following things -
> Favourite colours of wall paper
> Favourite colours of carpet
> Single bed, double bed or king sized bed?
> Will you bring your own bed sheets or will i need to
> buy some more?
> Will you sometimes have lady lovers stay with you?
>
> Do not worry about anyone knowing of this
> transaction. My wife tryed to
> read my emails but i have made sure she can no
> longer 'see anything' if you
> know what i mean.
>
> IN THE NAME OF THE FATHER, THE SON AND THE HOLY
> SPIRIT, AAAAAMEEEN
> Warmth and forgiveness,
>
> Mr . T
>
 

Paradroid

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Jan 2, 2004
Messages
645
I think I saturated my senses on 419 eaters a while ago.

You do all realise that in years to come some of these might be real "My father was an email scamster...millions need laundered..etc etc etc".

;)
 

itcheh

Part of the furniture
Joined
Dec 23, 2003
Messages
740
tris- said:
My wife tryed to read my emails but i have made sure she can no longer 'see anything' if you know what i mean.
Love it
 

~Yuckfou~

Lovely person
Joined
Dec 22, 2003
Messages
2,594
Another one landed today.....


"Attention Sir:
Before I proceed, may I humbly introduce myself to your good self, My Name is Mr.Usman Bello, an Iraqi refugee ,my Father was until recently, one of the personal aid to the president of Iraq who was formerly overthrown out of power during the War in My Country which took many life .
Prior to this last serious crisis that is still ravaging in my country, which recently led to misfortune of our government and my late Father's position as the personal aid to the president, we were able to come over here in Thailand with my mother for investment ,we inherited the sum of US$16 Million. The funds were originally gotten from my late Father's proceeds. My late father was able to safe guard the fund with a very good diplomatic contact from my Country to Thailand which make us to come here to plan our life.
But all is about life and death I witnessed another tragedy which could have taken my own life in Thailand here but I feel this is not the time, It started on 26th of December here in Phuket another disaster occurred here named( TSUNAMI) which as well took the life of my mother and up till now her body are yet to to be found, I am the only surviving person in my Family now.
I have decided to contact you because I am interested in investing in your country . Please kindly guide and assist me in making the right investment as every thing regarding technical and logistics details is worked out and ascertained to our respective satisfaction. In view of your participation, I am ready to give you a good negotiable percentage for your assistance, or better still commit it into viable Joint venture projects, be assured that you stand no risk of any kind as the funds belong to me as the only surviving son. As soon as I get your consent, I will quickly move this fund to your country for investment .
However, upon your acceptance to work as my partner, you can contact me with my private telephone number or e-mail for more details.I strongly believe that associating with you to embark on this and other business ventures will derive a huge success here after, please include you private contact telephone number and private e-mail when replying.
Yours Sincerely.
Mr.Usman Bello."

I wish all that shit had actually happened to the thieving scumbag tbh.
 

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