Friday night mistakes

[Darksword]

well its saturday, the day that you regret the stupid things you did last night while hammered so, what did you do last night, or anytime youve been drunk that you regret? cheer me up since i made a dickhead of myself last night and your misery will comfort me

 

[Shagrat]

worst thing i ever did was when i was out with a load of mates at Sector 5 in Leicester.

Gorgeous blonde haired girl in a tight one peice leather dress sat down on her own about 10 feet away from us. I was trolleyed (which is usually the only time I had the courage to talk to women) so I staggered over and said the first thing that came into my head.

Unfortunately that was "So, would you like to sit on my face" (in my defense, the dress was very short and I think that my mind might have locked on that particular area).

One slapped face later I had to stagger back over to where all my friends were pissing themselves laughing.....took a looooong time to live that one down

 

[Cadagdur]

Haha Shagrat priceless ^.^

I can't remember anything i've done perticularly but i always just do dumbass stuff...it's so annoying when you remember the next day and its like.. what was i thinking, i'll never drink again!
*that night*
*does another dumbass thing* <.<

 

[Ezteq]

hmm most embaressing one was prolly when i was 17 and a bit heart borken so my sister (10 yrs older than me) took me out to cheer me up, me not being old enough to get served and coming from a small town where everyone knew i was 2 young had about 3 or 4 bud's b4 we went out and asked for coke when we got to the pub, sister was getting me double bacardis and coke which i thought hmm tastes a bit odd, must have been due to the beers.

so i was drinking these fast thinking they were just cokes and bumped in to my stepdad was chatting to him wondering why my words were coming out fuzzy when my body decided to stay where it was and my legs had other ideas and wanted to run to the side, i excused myself and went to the ladies to wash face and have a wee,

long queue in ladies room and suddenly i got that swooping feeling in my stomach and puked right in the middle of the floor crying out "ive only been drinking coke!!" <barf again> finally made it in to a stall and thats the last i remember till i woke up in hospital.

"but i only had 3 or 4 bud's then i was on coke's all night!!" was the first thing i said my furious mother hovvering over me with a nurse, then my sister sheepishly chipped in from the side "erm actually was some bacardis in there too, i thought she knew"

later i was told how i was wheeled out on a gurney through the nightclub which contained just about everyone from my town, covered in sick and unconsious.

needless to say i kept a very low profile for quite some time afyter that, ive done worse stuff but this embaresses me the most cos it wasnt my fault.

 

[Blackjack]

Decided to drink until i couldn't see myself in the mirror. Can't remember a thing from 8 to 2 (when i fell on my bike and hit my head) was told the day after how i was kissing a leather couch and i fell over a doorstep and just lay on the floor with my pants down my ankles for 10 mins.

Drunk as fuck peeing in bottles and placing them around the outside of my friends house. He counted 6 full bottles of wee when he went out the next morning

At 14. Very very drunk. Got home at around 2. barfed on the floor. tried to call someone. got "This number does not exist" tried 3 times more.. no luck. turned on Tv. Barfed again. turned the volume way up. zapped around and the second i hit Tv1000 a gigantic "OHH yeah, fuck me!" booms through the house and my dad and his GF steps through the door to the livingroom and asks.. "Could you atleast turn it down" barfed again... with some giant cock thumping a helpless chick in the background. too drunk to be embarrassed at the time though

got caught having sex on a playground, then again.. dont really regret that. still embarrassing'ish.

decided to have alittle fun with a girl in my friends bathroom. Sat her on the side of the tub.. BAM his drunk father runs through the door wanting to borrow his bathroom. drunk as i am i try to move too fast, start to fall, accidently push her into the empty tub trying to hold my balance. Fall.. and land on her head. Resulting in a massive bumb

Have more, but a lot of them are somehow related to drunk sex. so i'll spare you

 

[Mikah75]

..

haha blackjacks are the best;D
i would share mine... but they're too bad and people i know might be reading :touch:
"Have more, but a lot of them are somehow related to drunk sex. so i'll spare you " <cough> same category
you had sex... in a playground poor kids.

 

[Dandare]

Had quite a bad night a couple of years ago.....
It was christmas a the drinks were flowing fast..too fast.
After 10-12 pints of stella any many aftershocks I decided to talk to a guy we all know.He's 6ft 7ish 19stone ex rugby player,he's reknowned for when he is drunk telling others how to treat there lady and how to look after them.
Normally I shrug these comments off and just laugh but this time my ugly stella head reared up and decided enough was enough and I proceded to tell what I thought of him and the reason he was still single was the fact he spoke so much bullshit,after his shocked response I was heard to say at the top of my voice there that pissed on your bonfire!
At this point he was ready to kill me and some friends ushered me out the back door and told me go home,so I walked off mumbling something about pissing on his bonfire with another friend.
About 100 yards down the road I decided to take a leak againest a dry stone wall,but fell face first into the wall knocking myself clean out and causing a 3 inch gash on my forehead,my friend could'nt move me at all and decided to go back for his car to get me in,while bundling me into the back still clean out an old couple pulled up thinking my friend had hit me with the car and did we want the police..
After coming round at home I decided I was ok and started on the xmas sprits at home....upon waking in the morning with 2 black eyes my wife noticed something very strange about our gas fire I had wee'd all over it prolly with the saying I pissed on his fire in my head.
The fire never worked again.
And I don't go in that pub much now.

 

[cHodAX]

Docwolfe got blitzed and shagged my 74yr old gran but I suppose that is his story to tell...

 

[Mikah75]

,..

lol lovely!
dan come keep me company:< im all alone

 

[Ezteq]

Dan!!! "that pissed on your bonfire!" LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!

classic

 

[Darksword]

LOL all brilliant, still my one feels the worst atm so keep the good/bad stories coming lol

 

[Mikah75]

..

is it sex related?
cos if it isnt, theres no reason not to tell us

 

[Huntingtons]

we wanna hear yours :<
I think i was told that i stopped a train once :/ not sure about that tho, seems so unlikely to stop it even tho its 10 yards from the station.
dont recall doing anything that i found embarrasing cept for talking/hitting on strange things :/ (most embarrasing stuff usually includes the opposite sex, other stuff i've done never made me embarrased when told about it)

 

[Mikah75]

..

hitting on strange "things" eh

 

[Huntingtons]

hitting on strange "things" eh

some of it really would be a shame to call girls :/ unfortunatly for me.

 

[Mikah75]

..

lmao xD

 

[Hawkwind]

The wife

 

[Darksword]

we wanna hear yours :<
I think i was told that i stopped a train once :/ not sure about that tho, seems so unlikely to stop it even tho its 10 yards from the station.
dont recall doing anything that i found embarrasing cept for talking/hitting on strange things :/ (most embarrasing stuff usually includes the opposite sex, other stuff i've done never made me embarrased when told about it)

lol mine isnt that bad just tres embarrasing i.e. i didnt get naked and smack a bouncer hten cock slap the po po, but it still sucks pretty bad but kind long to type out so ill do it later - come on i cant believe there arent more stories.

embarrasing story 1; back at the beggining of last year i was out drinking and i cant remember what the dare was, was something stupid. anyway, i did the dare, wasnt that bad i just looked stupid for like 10 seconds, but my friend refused to buy me the pint he owed me, so i was joking about how he owes me a pint (which he did). anyway later i ended up talking to some people from my school that i dont really like, anyway i ended up demanding a pint off them for about 5 minutes quiet loud aswell. then my mate to get me to calm down (i was joking but pretending i was serious) said he'd get me a pint, to which i responded "shut up! my round!". got a round in, then was talking to this guy who my mate doesnt like, my mate ended up getting in a fight with him, i was hammered and see the other guy punch my mate so i just dive over (literally) just smack the guy once then land on a sofa like completely missed the fight lol looked like a dickhead. then we went to a house party we crashed and on my way out some guy was threatening us saying he was pissed off at his and that he had been to anger management for 4 years and stuff (hence we gave him the nickname anger management), and then i complained i was cold so they gave me a random coat, ended up being the guys who owns the house but i didnt know and neither did they so i just walk off real proud with my new jacket (almost got in like 4 fights because of that jacket ).

but see all thats like nothing i can talk about that fine and feel no shame just pure proud of myself but feel like a dickhead about friday lol (got loads of worse stories just cant remember them, like the time i told my mate i fancied him by accident (was ment to be a girl ))

 

[Ormorof]

like the time i told my mate i fancied him by accident (was ment to be a girl ))

yeah ive done that before too... but it was worse i was replying to a girl in an email (this was coming home at about 3am after falling in a bush, finding my PC on! )and i accidently clicked reply all! so told all my mates, my brothers and my parents too how good looking they were in terrible english, i havent been able to live it down yet

 

[Ezteq]

lol when i was a young'un was in a club (same1 i passed out in years later) chatting to this bloke and thought hmm my jeans feel odd................ had a pair of drawers left up one of the legs from god knows when.

puked up over my own back, never turn round when you think you might not puke, cos if your wrong, thats what happened.

was in the middle of an epic snog and ran away yelling "SHIT IMA GONNA PUKE!!"

woke up on a saturday morning with some random dj wannabe pleb asleep handcuffed naked to my bed, i went to get me brekkie (cold spaghetti hoops out of the tin) when i walked back in bedroom noticed about 3 scaffolders on roof opposite looking in, really embaressing but i just waved and carried on eatin me hoops and watching cartoons, tbh didnt know what else 2 do.

[edit: oh and btw as mentioned lived in small town so every1 knew about it before i'd finished my brekkie]

 

[Marc]

Cant think of anything embarassing ive done when i was drunk. Asking women out who bomb u out, or saying something like Shagrat mentioned doesnt really embarass me. When the full monty was out, they played the music in a club so i got on stage and did a full strip, some poor woman ending up with my armanis smack bang on her face, didnt find that embarassing at all. Maybe i dont embarass easy?

 

[Darksword]

lol

well, ive liked htis girl for a while, like since we started talking really, but she was going out with my mate so i just lived with it, even tho it was killing me not telling her but meh then they broke up or whatever and we were still good friends, used to talk to each other loads and text each and stuff and was all cool. by this time some of my close mates knew i really liked her and, well ill be honest me and my mates are dickheads, we wont pass up an opportunity to make each other feel stupid. so they, being the genius' they are stole my mobile and after reading the texts she sent me decided they wanted to text her from my fone, oh the joy. ok once, not that bad she knew it was them, and got over it, things seemed fine, couple of days later again, they did the same thing but texting worse stuff. ok twice, bit stupid but things seemed ok-ish, we still talked and things didnt seem wierd, then 3rd time, they were looking at the photos and stuff and my phone was lieing about so i didnt notice, then i realised. got a bit fucked off by then, i didnt think she fancied me and she was a really good friend (say was coz.. well ill explain in a sec) and didnt want to lose her as a friend. So i got bit fucked off, especially since after that we kinda didnt really talk for a few days, then the ***** texted her again, got pretty angry at them at this stage and since that it stopped, but well damage was done etc. didnt hear from her since then till like night before results when she texted me asking bout smoking the next day or something. found out on results day she had been going out with her ex girlfriend and stuff, dunno why she hadnt told me but meh, theyd broken up again by then and after that we started talking more often and stuff and shit seemed cool. then leeds festival, we were gunna meet up and stuff but fone batterys and no recharge tent = sucks, and my other mate who i thinks abit jelous kept sneeking off to her tent and stuff lol and i wouldnt tell anyone and he was only one that knew where she was camped at but i had an amazing time so didnt care that much, decided it just wasnt ment to be.

then the dreaded friday night out in town with mates, i got pretty hammered pretty quickly, and my friend was being a dickhead refusing to talk to this girl who he likes and she likes him and like he just blanked her and stuff. in a hammered state we made a quick bet that i had to tell this girl that i liked it or i was gay, and then he would speak to paris and stop being a bitch. anyway, staggering home i realised the time and remembering the bet decided i had to do it then and there or id lose face and be labelled gay (which wouldnt really bother me, yeh im "homophoebic" but i dont care) and in my drunken state i must win! so i decided to text her instead of ringing coz it was pretty late. now i wanted to tell her in person but the chance rarely popped up and i never had hte bottle to tell her. so anyway i did the dickhead thing and texted her, worst thing ever! since then i didnt hear from her till today, at school, and its just been wierd between us, like hardly talked and stuff so grrrrrrrrrrrrr definatly the most dickhead thing ive done to date (and yes worse than stripping to raise £5 for a busker, and the guy didnt pay!). moral of the story is DONT EVER DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO AND JUST USE YOUR BRAIN!

thats a fucking long winded story considering i could have said "texted a girl i really like and fucked up bigtime" lol but meh.

 

[Ezteq]

aww hunny get some better mates tbh, the ones youve git sound like right arseholes.

 

[DocWolfe]

phones are fucking dangerous when you're drunk.

was going out with this bird, basically she was a bit of a strange one it wasn't going to last anyway but I planned on dumping her tactfully. But she text me asking what I was doing on this night, and I basically replied, that she was boring and she had no personality. I never heard from her again, but I bumped into one of her friends a couple of months later, who told me she joined the army and went to iraq seriously.

 

[Calaen]

lol

well, ive liked htis girl for a while, like since we started talking really, but she was going out with my mate so i just lived with itut things seemed ok-ish

she had been going out with her ex girlfriend and stuff, dunno why she hadnt told me but meh, theyd broken up again by then and after that we started talking more often

Are you a guy and is she Bi sexual? or you a lesbian?

im so fucking confused.

 

[DocWolfe]

Heres another one, I seem to attract bad things and fat women when I'm drunk.

I was round my mates house party on boxing day, and everyone was fucking sloshed, I used to go to school with this bird and she was on the bit of the large side basically I'm walking past the toilet and she opens the door and drags me in and starts getting off with me. Saying this she had a boyfriend, who was at this same house party. Being absolutely norked (and it had been a while since I got any) I didn't resist and (unfortunately) we ended up having sex upstairs in my mates house. After 10 minutes, I look down and realise shes on the crimson tide uke:

I came downstairs and a couple of my mates have twigged on to whats happened, but luckily her boyfriend hadn't. To this day I have flashbacks horrible, horrible flashbacks.

 

[Deacan]

Every friday night is a sodding nightmare for me.

As I don't drink I usally end up as the farking taxi.

 

[soze]

I decided the top of a hedgerow looked like a nice place to have a little nap when walking home drunk once. So using all my tact skill and cunning i climb on to the top try to lay down and fell right off the other side. I ripped a new pair of jeans and my shirt. It was only made ok when two of my friends climbing over to see if i was ok fell too

 

[Huntingtons]

Cant think of anything embarassing ive done when i was drunk. Asking women out who bomb u out, or saying something like Shagrat mentioned doesnt really embarass me. When the full monty was out, they played the music in a club so i got on stage and did a full strip, some poor woman ending up with my armanis smack bang on her face, didnt find that embarassing at all. Maybe i dont embarass easy?

got it the same way, when i do something really shitty when drunk i dont feel embarassed (unless i harm my mates or its about girls -.-).

 

[[SS]Gamblor]

I've done some werisd stuff when drunk.
thing is i don't get embarassed as such.

But i have pulled my fair share /yours/march's/nakk's/50% of Fh's share of Fat birds ( why .. i don't know why myself).

Worst was some scary chick in Sheffield, i woke up the next morning , popped next door where i should of been staying and couldnt' find my jacket, pop back into her house ( students =) ) and no sign of my jacket, so head home to dublin a few hours later, next time i'm back ( 8 months later) i find out that she had nicked my jacket and liked to wear it going to bed.
I haven't seen her since that fateful night. scary biatch.

Falling asleep in a toliet in a resteraunt, the fuckers never checked so i wake up 4 am , asleep , trousers around the ankles , everything is pitch black . I get dressed , wander upstairs to the main floor , and nothing around.
I foned the R0zzers to say that i'd been locked in , and procded to start banking on the shutters to the outside , get my head clean blown off when the alarm went off, the speaker was about 2 foor to my right. the owners show up start giving out to me. I just shrug and walk out on them =).

and before any of the ladds or lasses start,

was in Manc for a Guild meeting , Seeing as i'm from hib there was bound to be a few bugs. Any night i had pizza from a particualr takeaway i feel asleep.
least i gave my guildies a good laugh =).