Faceparty Ownage

BloodOmen

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I was pissing myself when I read this LOL.



"Maverick UK social network Faceparty has today told its millions of users it "can't be arsed" with their attitudes, and so has "shut the whole site down and fucked off to the zoo".

According to an outstanding rant posted to faceparty.com today and titled "To tha Haterz", the site's users have been complaining over an unfulfilled promise to provide "free cool tools" to everyone who uploaded a picture of themselves in fancy dress.

Faceparty's operators dispute users' claims that they have failed to deliver the "free cool tools" on time. In today's missive they promise to delete the account of "every single twat who moaned about their friggin' free cool tools". Users are warned that if they moan again the administrators will shut Faceparty down and get a job instead.

One particular "nob", we're told, is suing Faceparty because he didn't get his "free cool tools". We'll let Faceparty explain why it believes that's unfair itself:

Listen this is our HOBBY, not our business. there was a time when you understood that - back when the net was run buy [sic] the people like us, and not by massive corporations - just because MySpace and Facebook sold out to the corporate world, doesn't mean we did - we said no. Stop expecting "customer service" from us, cos WE DON'T HAVE CUSTOMERS - IT'S A FREE FUCKING SITE - too many of you treat us like we owe you something.

And quit the "you need us attitude" cos we really fucking don't. We don't make money from you - it's free. The things you pay for only cover the costs for the things you use.

The fit of pique is not entirely out of character for Faceparty, owned by Anarchy Towers Ltd. It's probably best known to most Reg readers for its unusual decision to kick out everyone over the age 36 because they might be paedophiles. It claimed new laws would mean the government would force it to verify all email addresses against the Sex Offenders Register, which it refused to do.

It was unclear how kicking out everyone older than 36 helped, or why that age was chosen. Faceparty later said it had deleted the accounts for other reasons.

The Guardian reported in November last year that Faceparty's audience was declining after peaking at six million, although today's message claims the recent mass deletions took out seven million profiles. According to the paper it's favoured by clubbers and gay men.

You can read Faceparty's whole, brilliant tirade against its users in all its glory here. We've also saved a copy here for when the admins get back from the zoo.

The site's operators might not be paper billionaires, but they make much more interesting copy than boy-droid Gates clone Mark Zuckerberg. And for that, we at least, thank them. ®"
 

megadave

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haha, fucking right.

people who care about social networking sites are a bunch fucking twats
 

Ezteq

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lol i got a few sour looks at uni when we were asked to describe search resources we used to find information i said forums and the tutor said Oh what like facebook? and i says no, i mean useful ones lol

facebook is a waste of bloody space tbh theres this woman who comes in the library pretty much every sodding day and spends her whole hour on facebook while her toddler either sits there board shitless, screams and cries or runs about the library like a wee wild beastie. i really cant see the point in it...but then i guess facebookers would say the same about FHOT so i'll stfu lol
 

BloodOmen

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I got a facebook acc :p i don't use the **** tho lol i mainly made it to try find old school mates.
 

tris-

Failed Geordie and Parmothief
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lol i got a few sour looks at uni when we were asked to describe search resources we used to find information i said forums and the tutor said Oh what like facebook? and i says no, i mean useful ones lol

facebook is a waste of bloody space tbh theres this woman who comes in the library pretty much every sodding day and spends her whole hour on facebook while her toddler either sits there board shitless, screams and cries or runs about the library like a wee wild beastie. i really cant see the point in it...but then i guess facebookers would say the same about FHOT so i'll stfu lol

you should trap the kid and cook him.
replace with a cabbage patch doll in the pram.
 

Sharma

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AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH!

I would say it's a shame but it really really isn't. :p
 

Dukat

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I made a face party account back in college after being nagged by friends - soon after none of us could be arsed anymore and we abandoned it.

A few years later a new batch of friends at college(the old lot had all dropped out lol) nagged me into making a myspace account, I continued to log into this every now and again after they abandoned thiers but gradually it just became a way of leaving messages to people I wasnt really in contact with anymore (eg. lost/threw away thier phone number etc).

Now it isnt even that, I just hardly see the point in it anymore, its a nice way to show photo's & leave messages to friends & family if you are spread out geographicly but not much more than that for me.

Largely people just treat it as a game - to be 'cool' you have to have lots of friends and a 'leet' profile. So everyone invites bands and 5 million people they dont know and will never message just to get the friends count up, then only ever talk to any of them through emo-blog style "bulletins" which normally consist of "OMFG NAME YOUR FAVORITE COLOUR OF WEST AFRICAN GOAT, SEND THIS MESSAGE TO ATLEAST FIVE OTHER FRIENDS BY TOMOROW OR YOUR HEAD WILL FALL OFF" anyway, so its all just a boring waste of time nowadays :(

Faceparty used to be good, no doubt the creators are justified in making a post like this - the net is falling prey to fat couch potato consumerism and its good to see it fighting back like this.

GO INTARNETS! :fluffle:
 

megadave

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Facebook sucks too, it's just an impersonal way of contacting people. if you really wanted to speak to them you'd phone them up.
 

Dukat

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im glad you remembered what i taught you about myspace

lol :D YOU MYSPACE LEET BOI TRIS!! :D

Actually you dont get the admiral ackbar seal of approval because your 'about me' bit says your 20 but your actual display age is different!!!
*points* *shames*

:( SHAME



:D

:sex:
 

Dukat

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Facebook sucks too, it's just an impersonal way of contacting people. if you really wanted to speak to them you'd phone them up.

Whats the difference between a social networking site and email? or text messages?

They're impersonal but they're also occassionally convenient. If I want to contact someone in Australia without either staying up until a stupid hour of the night or spending a fortune on phone calls, why not go for something where we can leave messages just like on a forum and catch up when we have time?

Its convenient for both me and the person I want to communicate with to use email and sometimes a social site such as Myspace. I dont see it as me not wanting to talk to someone if I leave them a message.
 

Aoami

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Facebook sucks too, it's just an impersonal way of contacting people. if you really wanted to speak to them you'd phone them up.


I disagree. Facebook is the manly way of calling your mates 'just for a chat'.
 

Lamp

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Internet whingers are worse than someone sticking a ham sandwich up your bum
 

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