Does sex matter in a relationship?

[AngelHeal]

You're easier to satisfy then a granny in heat

...wonders how tohtori knows how easy it is to satisfy a granny in heat...

 

[TdC]

Except doggystyle *nod*

relationship grind, foo though I'll accept doggystyle as a decent second

 

[old.Tohtori]

...wonders how tohtori knows how easy it is to satisfy a granny in heat...

There's nothing to wonder as the answer is very very simple

relationship grind, foo though I'll accept doggystyle as a decent second

Ain't no relationship problem that couldn't be postponed by a little doggy

Actually said that in a bar, and the women were "yeah i agree, it's just wonderful" and started jibbering about dogs. What followed, was priceless

 

[AngelHeal]

There's nothing to wonder as the answer is very very simple

/me hides me granny

 

[Iceforge]

When I say matter - I mean 'do you need it - does it have to be present.'

Now, not to be presumptious, but I do assume myself to be at least a semi-sane semi-adult and your question is if I need to have sex in a love relationship?

Erm..... whats the bloody point of claiming to be more than friends with someone if you got no bloody sex?

I mean, oh, sure kissing is great, but come on, I was put here on this planet to reproduce, I want kids some day (not right now!), so a relationship without sex would be completely pointless to me

 

[old.Tohtori]

Erm..... whats the bloody point of claiming to be more than friends with someone if you got no bloody sex?

That actually sounds like you only say you love someone if you want sex from them

Friends don't spend as much time, don't share all, don't support through all, don't hold you up financially and emotionally when needed, don't listen to you at anytime, don't just want but actually need to spend time with you etc etc...

 

[Bahumat]

Well i don't think it matters...

*waits for the neysayers to finish their grumbling*

...done? Good.

As in, it doesn't matter for a relationship as much as it's part of it, and it's a good thing if it's good, but as we can see from EQs answer, it's not a defining factor.

Trust matters, supporting eachother matters, love matters(less then the two before), etc. But sex, it's part of it and simply the ultimate hug if you will. And if you want to say "hugs matter in a relationship", in a meaningful way, then i guess sex would matter too.

Ofcourse this depends on what you mean by "matters". Is it a necessity, or a needed part, or a part of it.



Oooh nice comeback, let me retort

If i did, it must've been really bad since i don't remember it.

I agree with the Seel.

If you hold your partners hand its a sign of affection. Sex is the same, but on a higher degree. With sex it's you sharing your love and affection for that person (talking about couples, not one night stands).

I found sex is a way you can really really show your love/affection for that person, and for them to you. I always found it was like the closest you could ever be to that person (stealing Lucius's line "emotionally, physically and spiritually")...not sure if that's if thats a weird way of looking at it?

I think it is important, but it's not as important as some may think.

 

[Bahumat]

WAIT!

STOP EVERYTHING!



You mean we're not supposed to do that?

So thats what all the funny looks are about! BAHUMAT YOU LIED TO ME!!

Shut up and bend over a bit more

 

[Fafnir]

If you hold your partners hand its a sign of affection. Sex is the same, but on a higher degree. With sex it's you sharing your love and affection for that person (talking about couples, not one night stands).

Dam i must really love myself then when im slapping the monkey..

 

[Iceforge]

That actually sounds like you only say you love someone if you want sex from them

Friends don't spend as much time, don't share all, don't support through all, don't hold you up financially and emotionally when needed, don't listen to you at anytime, don't just want but actually need to spend time with you etc etc...

Well, the relationship wouldn't be going anywhere if it was just a girl who was nice, I had to spend a lot of time with, shared everything with, had to support through all, hold up finacially and emotionally, listen to at anyway and I need to spend time with, if that relationship couldn't give me the things I needed in life.
I know when I am in a dead-end relationship and if thats the case you better stop it while as soon as possible.

You might think it is all about the coming together for each other stuff like that, that is simply just not enough for me. I don't mind that and i need that too, the relationship can't be just about sex, but closeness without sex is just as little a relationship to me as sex with closeness is.

 

[liloe]

That actually sounds like you only say you love someone if you want sex from them

Friends don't spend as much time, don't share all, don't support through all, don't hold you up financially and emotionally when needed, don't listen to you at anytime, don't just want but actually need to spend time with you etc etc...

I kinda disagree there, though =)

I even daresay that with some friends I can have more in common with my partner, but I don't love them in the same way. I have a very good friend which I've known for like 17y now and no matter in what situation he was, I would've helped him out no matter what. I defended him when other talked BS about him, we spent hours and hours together (ofc sometimes more, sometimes less, distance makes that harder). Some weeks I had the impression I lived at his house and I know most things that are going on in his family. I swear, if he needs something really important right now, I stop what I'm doing and go help. When his mother died a few months back I changed all my plans to just be there and help out (part of his family is French). NOW don't get me wrong, this is not a hymn to myself, because on countless occasions, I could count on him helping me in the same way =)

So if you ask me, the difference between friend and partner is that little extra thing - sexual love (or however to call it). I find that really hard to explain, but it's not only (but also) physical attraction, it's that feeling when you're with your partner. You want to touch them, kiss them etc.
You can wake up next to your best buddy after a long night (now be it male or female) but don't tell me you'll give them the same look than you'll give your partner =)

 

[Himse]

Sex matters in mine and Bugz's gfs relationship.

 

[old.Tohtori]

Well, the relat*snip* sex with closeness is.

Well that's not really answering anything i said, but taking it to a whole different place again. But what the hey...if you define a dead-end relationship as "not getting any" and if you define love by sexing someone up, then by all means do. Not that i'd ever agree.

I kinda disagree t*snip*our partner =)

You don't hug a friend the same way, you don't talk to a friend the same way, you don't talk about the same things to a friend the same way...and if you base that disagreement on the "look" you give your partner in the morning, it means you agree that there's more then just sex. You can support and whatnot your friend too, good for you, good friend, but it's NOT the same.

You don't love your friends like you love your love. Sex is moot in that context.

 

[AngelHeal]

...i think the question to all this is:

what are you suposed to do?

A: reproduce as efficient as possible.

What does efficient reproducing require?

the product (in this case often a child ) needs stuff. ie food school etc.
why does this child need stuff?

so he/she can reproduce aswell xD

now how can you make sure your own product (yes again a child!!, or in some cases a monkey, you never know with some FH ppl aint that right toht?) with reproduce itself hm?

by giving him good basics.

-neutral territory: culture, land, friends
- school: smartness, also higher income probaly wich leads to bigger house often maybe better security systems ie safety ie sur5all.

now... my point is:

Why are you in a relationship?
Because if you shag the guy/woman you are sure you will reproduce.
That goes from both way's!! (unles using safety but that isnt a nature thing).
And if you stay together, the chances are you're guy/girl will shag a other guy/girl are smaller then if you're single, ie will get more children.
Wich you dont want because then there's less food for your own child.
So does sex matter? Yes!



now said all this gimmeh a cookie!

 

[soze]

Yes I know a few people who have not gone after a relationship becuase the sex was not right. "Shes a lovely girl good looking nice sence of humour but she lays there like a sack of spuds during sex". Sex is a big part of a relationship and cheating be it because sex with the significant other has got boring or whatever causes allot of break ups.

Sex is not everything to me im not that highly charged but if my GF was not compatible in bed i think it would end or when you do get thoese urges you are gonna look elsewhere.

 

[AngelHeal]

Yes I know a few people who have not gone after a relationship becuase the sex was not right. "Shes a lovely girl good looking nice sence of humour but she lays there like a sack of spuds during sex". Sex is a big part of a relationship and cheating be it because sex with the significant other has got boring or whatever causes allot of break ups.

Sex is not everything to me im not that highly charged but if my GF was not compatible in bed i think it would end or when you do get thoese urges you are gonna look elsewhere.

tbh mate..
if i had 3 hands i would've put 3 thumbs up for you.


:worthy::worthy::worthy:

 

[tris-]

yes i think so. if your partner doesnt want sex it makes you feel rejected and unnatractive.

people are saying without sex youre just friends who kiss and cuddle. what if you had sex with your friend, what does that make you then? i slept with one of my friends and we ended up becoming enemies!

 

[Aoami]

Sex (read Good Sex) matters in a relationship because there isn't much reason to have a relationship otherwise.

 

[TdC]

lays there like a sack of spuds during sex

maybe she was asleep? seriously though. this is where talking comes in handy: you have to let the other half know what's up! you like something? tell them, you want something? tell them, you dislike something? bring it delicately perhaps, but tell them, because if you don't you'll just get sick of whatever's going down.
besides, this intimate talking will bring you closer together. perhaps the other half has issues, is embarrassed, doesn't want to, or just doesn't know. if you don't know, and they don't know, you'll never be able to help each other work it out.

 

[Huntingtons]

if you have a sex drive, then yes - at least in order not to cheat, thats how i feel. i know people can love and live together as a couple (many adults live togethers without having sex, but not without ever having sex) but they must have had sex at one point for it to work... thats what i believe in

 

[Fafnir]

Why are you in a relationship?
Because if you shag the guy/woman you are sure you will reproduce.
That goes from both way's!! (unles using safety but that isnt a nature thing).
And if you stay together, the chances are you're guy/girl will shag a other guy/girl are smaller then if you're single, ie will get more children.
Wich you dont want because then there's less food for your own child.
So does sex matter? Yes!

Yup sex matter in a relationship, just look at the Welsh people shagging sheep, they have relationships and they seem to really love thoose fluffy animals.


baaaaad.

 

[old.Tohtori]

It all comes down(no pun) to the same thing as the age thing:

Personal preferences and individual people.

For instance, me, i could live without sex.
Others can't.
I wouldn't need to go out and find sex, 'cause i wouldn't need it.
Others would feel not having sex as rejection etc etc etc...

So you can't really say, definitively, yes or no.

 

[Azurus]

I really can't be arsed to read this thread, but was the student forum 'The student room'?

 

[Gahn]

Is this a piss take thread? xD

 

[soze]

maybe she was asleep? seriously though. this is where talking comes in handy: you have to let the other half know what's up! you like something? tell them, you want something? tell them, you dislike something? bring it delicately perhaps, but tell them, because if you don't you'll just get sick of whatever's going down.
besides, this intimate talking will bring you closer together. perhaps the other half has issues, is embarrassed, doesn't want to, or just doesn't know. if you don't know, and they don't know, you'll never be able to help each other work it out.

It was not me was a mate who described the previous night if it was me and she seemed that un interested i would have got off. I always ask a new girlfriend what floats her boat mainly with oral sex no point getting lock jaw if your not getting the job done!

 

[Mey]

I really can't be arsed to read this thread, but was the student forum 'The student room'?

I hope so cause i've signed up and started to spam that place too..

 

[Azurus]

I hope so cause i've signed up and started to spam that place too..

Ah a fellow troll. They're all so academically minded and prissy, it's almost too easy.

 

[old.Tohtori]

Ah a fellow troll. They're all so academically minded and prissy, it's almost too easy.

What what? An attack and noone told me?!

 

[Azurus]

What what? An attack and noone told me?!

It's not official Sir Tohtori, just some underground guerilla attacks. Only the elite core of FH are involved.

 

[Olgaline]

maybe she was asleep? seriously though. this is where talking comes in handy: you have to let the other half know what's up! you like something? tell them, you want something? tell them, you dislike something? bring it delicately perhaps, but tell them, because if you don't you'll just get sick of whatever's going down.
besides, this intimate talking will bring you closer together. perhaps the other half has issues, is embarrassed, doesn't want to, or just doesn't know. if you don't know, and they don't know, you'll never be able to help each other work it out.

well put,
thats the basic breakdown template for a longterm "sexual" relationship to work imo.