Child Beating Shock

[doh_boy]

Originally posted by sad_mung
Say what?

Two apples ate a spam fritter and walked to mars.

The Fire-Brigade say this is common and should not be taken with two glasses of water a day. (Within moderation)

Boom-Tish!

huh?

 

[Brynn]

Originally posted by sad_mung
Say what?

Two apples ate a spam fritter and walked to mars.

The Fire-Brigade say this is common and should not be taken with two glasses of water a day. (Within moderation)

Boom-Tish!

ehh, yea im confused too. however it doesn't take much

 

[Brynn]

This Aberdonian woman was being investigated by the Child Protection agency. The woman turned up on her door
ChildCareLady "Excuse me miss but it says you have 10 children living here"
BamWoman "Aye"
ChildCareLady "Ok, What are their names"
BamWoman "Baz"
ChildCareLady "you named them all Baz?"
BamWoman "Aye"
ChildCareLady "why?"
BamWoman "So when i call for dinner i just yell Baz"
ChildCareLady "what if you want to speak to one individually?"
BamWoman "I just yell their last name"

WayHay

 

[sad_mung]

Originally posted by doh_boy
huh?

It was just another nonsensical joke like the previous one.

Too satirical perhaps?

 

[doh_boy]

Originally posted by sad_mung
It was just another nonsensical joke like the previous one.

Too satirical perhaps?

Harold Shipman == Serial (cereal) killer.

Cereal on the rampage...needed stopping. (read killing).


It makes sense..... yours

 

[sad_mung]

Oh serial/cereal....ahahhahaha, how very drool.

At least mine makes sense if you come from universe which posesses 11 dimensions.

 

[doh_boy]

Originally posted by sad_mung
Oh serial/cereal....ahahhahaha, how very drool.

At least mine makes sense if you come from universe which posesses 11 dimensions.

A joke about string theory!? :eek2: <monty python>RUN AWAY!! RUN AWAY!!!!</monty python>

 

[Brynn]

on now im really confused. it went from easy to understand knock-knock jokes to ones you have to think about, bad thinky jokes

 

[-fus-]

knock knock!
Who's there?
Runip
Runip .....


*groan*

 

[Sibanac]

knock knock!
Who's there?
Ivan
.......

(plenty more where that came from btw)

 

[doh_boy]

Originally posted by Sibanac
knock knock!
Who's there?
Ivan
.......

(plenty more where that came from btw)

That one only works when its a new combine harvester (BTW)

 

[leggy]

Knock Knock!
Who's there?
The Barrysworld forumites...

..."oh fuck off you lot are more annoying that ****ing jehovah's witnesses"

 

[sad_mung]

Knock Knock
Who's there?
What was this...
What was this who?
What was this thread about again?

Knock Knock
What the f'hell do you want now?
Dead dog sir?
Dead dog sir who?
No, no sir. Do you want a dead dog?
Oh look just sod off will you?
That's a no then sir?
Yes it bloody is! What the hell would I do with a dead dog?
I dunno..cook it?
Cook it?! What am I? Korean?
Korean completely off the thread yes!

Boom Tish!

 

[doh_boy]

you're all too cynical

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Ernie says to Mike
behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a
doctor."

"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike
replies. "There's a diagnostic computer down at Walmart.
Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you
what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds
and costs ten dollars ... a hell of a lot cheaper than a doctor."

So Ernie deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it
to Walmart. He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights
up and asks for the urine sample.

He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds
later, the computer ejects a printout: You have tennis elbow.
Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It
will improve in two weeks.

That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology
was, Ernie began wondering if the computer could be fooled.

He mixed some tap water, a urine sample from his dog, urine
samples from his wife and daughter, and masturbated into
the mixture for good measure.

Ernie hurried back to Walmart, eager to check the results.
He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits
the results.

The computer prints the following:

1.. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.

2.. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with antifungal shampoo.

3.. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.

4.. Your wife is pregnant ... twin girls. They aren't yours.
Get a lawyer.

5.. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will
never get better.

 

[sad_mung]

Oh the pain....so old......but at least it made sense!

 

[doh_boy]

Shouldn' t it be dead horse? or at the very least donkey?