biting your tongue

[Overdriven]

paper cuts on your scrotum

(Made me cringe IRL

Paper cuts in the end of your penis ARGH

 

[Lamp]

I've actually had a papercut on my eyeball. The sharp corner edge of a piece of A4 paper tore open my cornea. Went to hospital. Was really feckin uncomfortable. Eye wouldn't stop watering. Hurt all the time. Sunlight combined with hayfever made it intollerable. Took a week to heal up.

 

[Golly]

a spider keeps following me around the house, hes around 3" legspan wise (fecking big) and black spider on white walls isnt exactly inconspicuous.

but seriously, hes sat next to me in 3rooms in the last 15mins (living room -> kitchen -> study)

ROFL he just fell off the wall as i was typing that

this is class

but like, whys it following me? could it be the spider i kept as a pet a month back has come back to me? (i was taking the bins out and saw this monster, so put him in an old fish tank and fed him on wasps which he seemed to enjoy, as did i, fucking hate wasps- but i released him after about 4days)

spider-psyche!

edit: im insane arent i

 

[Lamp]

Maybe its Joor

 

[old.Tohtori]

IT doesn't matter which animal/insect it is, they WILL get used to humans and if they spend time and you feed them, they will remember.

It's just a nature thing.

Congrats mommy, it's a spider.

 

[Lamp]

OMG ! Toto talking about spiders without using the words "all" "spiders" "must" "die"

Have you been taking spidertherapy without telling us ?

 

[old.Tohtori]

OMG ! Toto talking about spiders without using the words "all" "spiders" "must" "die"

Have you been taking spidertherapy without telling us ?

Must spiders all die? *grin*

You see, they'll never expect a friendly person type of guy to...freon the f*ckers until they start to crack and then smash them to little bits with an icecube with their spidery mate frozen inside it

 

[Overdriven]

If not said... SPIDERS ARE FUCKING EVIL... I want to tame one now We get no wasps/bees though

 

[Golly]

If not said... SPIDERS ARE FUCKING EVIL... I want to tame one now We get no wasps/bees though

to be fair, how often does a spider "go for ya"

i keep snakes as an interest, and theyve never once attempted to bite me or do me any harm, they just want to explore a bit like most animals

also keep rabbits (3 atm but use to have 15!) and guinea pigs (only one left now, had to put one down yday, again use to have 8) and cats, and all of those have made more of an attempt to nip or bite me then snakes ever have

spiders in a harsh situation, being such ugly fookers they obviously draw a bit of hate, and theyre awfully good at startling people. doubt theres much malice in the little blighters though

 

[Lamp]

to be fair, how often does a spider "go for ya"

I once bred a spider with an elephant, a tiger, and a cheetah.

This 8-legged, 8-eyed terror of pure malevolence was 9 feet tall, had razor sharp teeth and claws, and could run at 100 KMH

Edit: Challenge for Toto: Photoshop that !

Those spiders (Lat. Arachnos Giganticus Panthera Felida) are not your typical house spider and WILL go for you. And catch you. And tear you to pieces. And eat you.

 

[Congax]

edit: fuck me I need to read the whole thread.

 

[old.Tohtori]

Edit: Challenge for Toto: Photoshop that ![/B]

For what?

I don't do charity on "dare" alone.

 

[leviathane]

spiders in a harsh situation, being such ugly fookers they obviously draw a bit of hate, and theyre awfully good at startling people. doubt theres much malice in the little blighters though

Go to Australia and start making friends with the local spiders

 

[tris-]

golly is the new lamp

 

[Sparx]

Go to Australia and start making friends with the local spiders

My parents have lived in Oz now for nearly 2 years, they havent seen any of these deadly mutant spiders yet.

I reckon its all a hoax created by the locals to stop people from visiting


(so i was told)

 

[Heta]

think the hoax is to lure you there and have you attacked by them!

 

[Golly]

golly is the new lamp

lamps much more special than me

 

[Wonk]

tris- is the new joor.










Hey, someone needs to be

 

[tris-]

wonk is the new wank

 

[Wonk]

wonk is the new wank

I've never heard that one before!!11

 

[Olgaline]

tris- is the new joor.

what's this? Lamp retired ?
but sure, I'll buy into it.

 

[tris-]

what's this? Lamp retired ?
but sure, I'll buy into it.

i wouldnt, its just another conspiracy, i seen a random video on youtube about it.

 

[Lamp]

Youtube is a US-government funded experiment.
Everyone who logs into the site has their IP automatically logged with the Pentagon
Pentagon computers then download software into your computer
They are able to read your thoughts.
Americans are evil.
Americans are aliens.
You could be an American.
your friends could be Americans !
Look to the skies !
What's that noise ?
Who's REALLY on the end of the phone ?
So you think you know who your wife / girlfriend is ? Do you ? Really ?