Bad jokes thread.

Fafnir

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Dec 22, 2003
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Bored at work so here goes...

How do you see on a car that its from Poland?


On the polish.
 

Ormorof

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why cant penguins fly? they cant afford plane tickets :(
 

Azurus

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What did the Jewish paedophile say to the kid?

Go easy on the sweets.
 

Laddey

Resident Freddy
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May 24, 2005
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Why did the chicken cross the road


to get to the other side.


What do you get if you run over an orange.

squash :(
 

old.Tohtori

FH is my second home
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Jan 23, 2004
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Fine, here goes:

Man goes to a bar, totally wasted, off his rocker, bouncing off tables and knocking over beers. The barman looks at this drunken swan dance until the man finally lurches over the counter.

"Choud shu pour me a dhrink?", says the man, spraying a fair amount of spit while he does.

The barman looks at the man and replies; "You've had enough..."

The man blinks, scratches his head while trying to hold his composure and after arranging his tongue in a comfortable way, he says; "Nho, bhut i'll thry one."
 

BloodOmen

I am a FH squatter
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Jan 27, 2004
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Knock Knock
Who's there?
Dr
Dr Who
DR WHOOOOOOOO........ :<


2 prositutes walking down the street, one says "You ever been picked up by the fuzz before?" the other says "No, but i've been swung around by the tits"
 

CorNokZ

Currently a stay at home dad
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Jan 24, 2004
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19,779
Why does Beyonce keep singing "To the left, to the left"?

Because ... have no rights

:(
 

Ormorof

FH is my second home
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why did the dead baby cross the road?

because it was stapled to the chicken :(
 

Everz

I am a FH squatter
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Nov 7, 2004
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The Chelsea board.
The Metropolitan Police.
A lady with an itchy crotch.

They all regret going for that Brazilian
 

Ormorof

FH is my second home
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Dec 22, 2003
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A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:

CHEESEBURGER: $2.50

CHICKEN SANDWICH: $3.50

HANDJOB: $10.00

Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to a meager looking group of men.

"Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile, "can I help you?"

"I was wondering", whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the
hand-jobs?"

"Yes," she purrs, "I am."

The man replies: "Well, go wash your hands, I want a cheeseburger!"


awww i can do better than that >.<


edit: i can:

a woman has 3 children, one day the children are wondering why they are named as they are...

so the eldest daughter asks: "mum, why was i named Daisy?"

to which the mother replies: "because when i was pregnant a daisy fell on my stomach"

the next day the second daughter asks: "mum, why was i named Rose?"

to which the mother replies: "because when i was pregnant, a rose fell on my stomach"

the third day the last child comes and says: "hhjahsifbbbluuuuuuuuuurga"

and the mother replies: "fuck off Fridge"
 

Devii

Loyal Freddie
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Aug 11, 2007
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I went on ebay the other day and brought a budgie... it went cheep

Devii
 

Lamp

Gold Star Holder!!
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Jan 16, 2005
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Australia wanted The Ashes - well they certainly got them now
 

Overdriven

Not a sandwich
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Jan 23, 2004
Messages
12,348
A few jokes:

Laddey isn't a chav.
Toht doesn't have a job.
O.D. doesn't have an addiction.
Bugz has an attractive GF.

:D
 

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