April 2011: An unsent letter to a lover

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An unsent letter to a lover​

I remember when.
I set pen to paper.
I wanted to say so much, I did not know if there would be, enough ink.
As it dried. As it dried.
I got so, so scared.
My mind froze up so much, I could not, even think.

I know that sorry.
Sorry is a word that will never be enough.
When all you wanted was to be free.
Free to give your love.
And I remember all of your suffering. And I did, I gave it to yer.
Fills me now with regret.
Things I did to you, make my eyes bleed.
I do not understand why.
I do not understand why.
I even spurned you with the greatest silent, that my mouth could keep.
But even now I am uncomfortable with the fact your love.
Drives you away and needs you to leave.

I read your letters, every one of them.
Yet some of which, filled my hearts needs.
Even then I wanted so much.
Those words, made me feel like a Peach.
But my life is fraught with indecision.
Leaving nightmares on the street.
I could not make a choice either way.
Leaving you scraping at walls.
Where there should be only peace.

I was all you needed.
Yeah that I know.
I was all that you needed.
Yet I do not want you to go.

And as you leave me behind with your ticket.
Clenched firmly in your hand.
Remember, that I hope the best for you.
I really hope and pray.
Then when you think of me please understand these words.
Unrequited, I will forever be.

I say my last words to you.
With a pang in my heart.
I mean this oh so much.
Leave this in mind with this last touch.
Let your.
Let your.
Let your...soul shine!
Let your.
Let your.
Let your...soul shine!